Friends w/o kids

Re: Friends w/o kids

• ahleesha member

  October 2012

  My two childless but married friends are planning a couple's getaway to Hawaii. Yeah, talk about making me feel left out everytime we are hanging out and they do their planning . I decided I needed to meet more moms and reached out to my local board where I met another mom. We have met for coffee once so far but I already feel comfortable around her since we have a lot of similarities and are going through the same things since our babies are two months apart. My childless friends just don't understand and can't relate so I needed to find someone who did. I still love my childless friends but I also want to surround myself with moms who know what I am going through so that I have someone to talk to and relate to.

   
  

  

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• Bucks County Newlywed 808 member

  October 2012

  My two best friends don't have children yet, however both of them are TTC starting this fall, so it has been nice giving them advice and talking about that.  I think it would be different if they weren't in the "child stage" right now, but they are.  I made it a point to schedule a girls night out in October where we went to dinner and got drinks, and I tried not to talk about the baby.

  I actually joined a mom's group in my town and now I regret it and am thinking of dropping out!!! I feel like I get the best advice here, and the group of women are so competitive and fake, so it's not worth my time.   
  

  
  

  married 8.9.08
  jackson thomas. 8.9.12
  

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• apollonia10 member

  October 2012

  Bucks County Newlywed 808:

  I actually joined a mom's group in my town and now I regret it and am thinking of dropping out!!! I feel like I get the best advice here, and the group of women are so competitive and fake, so it's not worth my time.   
  

  Me too! LO is one of the oldest babies there and yet all these moms of 5 week olds are trying to give me advice that I didn't ask for. Every time I mention something about LO (like how he goes down for naps after about 90 minutes) I get an onslaught of advice about how their babies sleep much longer after being up for a few hours. Yes, your baby is a NEWBORN! He's going to sleep longer no matter what!

   On the friends without kids thing, a few of my friends had babies around the same time as we did, but we're all busy with babies now, lol. Other friends without kids are doing their own thing and don't really get it. My mom's best friend had kids 10 years after my mom did, and it was only then that they got as close as they were before my mom had kids.

  The thing that bugs me is when friends get all "I'm going to get pregnant in December" smug. I don't wish them a hard time, but I do wish they could be more empathetic, as it took us nearly 2 years to conceive.  

  

  
  

  
  

  

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• temporalrobe member

  October 2012

  the first 2 months, not much, the last month yes, a lot. they like to see the kiddo and being back to work has helped me reconnect with the outside world.

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• smashton14th member

  October 2012

  I have a few friends that we finally started hanging out with again. But then one of my friends told me that my other friend thinks that I'm too protective of the baby. Just because i dont let everyone hold her but i did let her hold my LO so i dont know what her problem is. Obviously she is kidless. Even though they are super protective of their little dog! They have no clue what it will be like to be a parent. So I'm glad i am moving 10 hours away. :

  

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• smashton14th member

  October 2012

  MissMusic:

  smashton14th:

  I have a few friends that we finally started hanging out with again. But then one of my friends told me that my other friend thinks that I'm too protective of the baby. Just because i dont let everyone hold her but i did let her hold my LO so i dont know what her problem is. Obviously she is kidless. Even though they are super protective of their little dog! They have no clue what it will be like to be a parent. So I'm glad i am moving 10 hours away. :

  Not to sound like a jerk, but I bolded the thought that might make your friends talk about you or feel you are hyper-moming. They're not parents but you have to be sensitive, too.  I know sometimes people don't understand if they haven't been there, and things change for everyone when someone has a child, but something about this made me twitchy.
  

  
  Believe me i never talk to anyone like that... Just needed to vent.

  

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