Two Under 2

Advice

I don't have 2 under 2, yet, but me and my husband were thinking about adding to our family this year. Our son was born in April, 12. And thinking about getting pregnant in march. Which would mean our son would be almost 2 when the baby is born.

My husband is 11 years older than me, he is 35 right now..and we want at least 3 kiddos, So basically I know we need to have our kids pretty close in age. Any advice is appreciated, I am just hesitant and I don't know why. I want to have another one no doubt but having 2 under 2, kind of worrys me. How do you handle potty training? Tantrums? Seperate bedrooms or the same? Do you get 2 cribs? So many questions!

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Re: Advice

  • Our 2u2 wasn't planned so I didn't have the "luxury" of all the uncertainties and questions. But, being thrown into it head first (in pregnancy anyway, #2 still has a few weeks to actually arrive...), we've just had to consider everything in the moment based on DD's personality, our parenting goals, and what we think will be best for our family, all the while being sure to stay flexible because, you know, who really knows what it'll be like? For example, right now we've got a PNP set up in our room for the baby and DD will stay in the crib in the nursery for a couple months. When we're ready to move the baby out of our room, DD will get a new, big girl room, and will (hopefully) start sleeping on a mattress on the floor. Then the baby will get the crib. She'll be about 20 months or so at that time. If, for some reason, it doesn't seem to be working out, we'll try something else. So...you kind of make plans but then you stay open to them changing. I'm sure you know by now how kids keep us guessing! GL on making your decision though!
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  • Didn't plan ours quite so close (19 months), but we wanted two for my sons sake, figured closer in age could only help a sibling relationship eventually   and I really wanted to be pregnant with my second before I turned 35 (2 weeks and my oldest will be 21 months). It's a little bit of chaos some days, we've done some things a little different than we would have (moved my son out of the crib sooner, bought a double stroller, etc.), but most people say it gets better and the relationships close once they get older. And although it's chaotic and tiring, it's still fun, and I'm only two months in.
  • We planned our 2u2 but had them closer together then originally planned out. We wanted a 16 month age gap, then got pregnant 1st try so that moved it to a 15 month age gap. Then DS came 5 weeks early, so now they are 13.5 months apart. Despite that we love their age gap! It's hard and exhausting but exactly perfect for our family. As for your questions:

    We got 2 cribs. DD is 2 and she is still in her crib. I absolutely suggest getting 2, but I know there are lots that say transitioning early was fine for their LO.

    Tantrums, I'm not sure what you mean. They happen to the best of us. Whenever my oldest is having a tantrum she has time out and my youngest just goes about his regular activities. My DS has started acting out because he is copying his sister so it's a bit trying when they both are going at it.

    Potty training hasn't happened yet because my DD isn't ready. We tried but we failed. We will be trying again soon. I found this really hard because she wanted her potty to be out but my DS wanted to play in it so I was constantly trying to get my DS out of the bathroom and my DD in there. Honestly it was super hard with 2. Maybe when we try again it will go smoother.

    My kids have separate bedrooms. My DS still isn't STTN at 1 yr. I couldn't imagine them sharing a room!!

    DH and I LOVE our 2u2!! We say all the time how much we are glad we did this. However 2 so close has completely removed a 3rd child from our future. We have enough to handle with our 2 and we are DONE now! But getting the baby stage, sleepless nights, bottles, formula and all that infant stuff over with at the same time has been amazing. If I had to chose I'd do this age gap again in a heartbeat.
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