The difference between a Shower and a Sprinkle...
Sawyerplus1
member
I'm just looking at that post below about 2nd showers and I noticed a trend with a lot of the answers. Without getting into whether 2nd showers are tacky, I noticed most people describe a shower as 1) a large event with many people with 2) a gift registry, and a sprinkle as a 1) smaller gathering and 2) no registry. Is that the general consensus? Is it regional?
With DS and DD (yes, I was thrown a shower for a second baby) the party was at the hostess' home, with only female family members (a few girlfriends were at the shower for DS too). There were light snacks and a cake. Everyone brought a gift, but none of the "big ticket" items, and I didn't register for either LO. So in your definitions, did I have showers or sprinkles? I'm just curious b/c I'd never heard of sprinkles before the Bump and all the showers I go to here are pretty much the same.
Re: The difference between a Shower and a Sprinkle...
I've never heard of the term "sprinkle" outside of the Bump.
Even the smaller parties I've been to (ones that would fall under the "sprinkle" category) were still called "baby showers" on the invitations. I kind of wonder if it's a bumpie invention.
Agreed, especially outright asking for one. Did you do it?
Ditto this. People were SO generous at my baby shower that I would have been mortified having someone invite them to another shower/sprinkle/sip n see/gift grab in my honor
DS 3.12.08
DD 7.11.09
DD 8.01.13
I think there's a big difference between asking for one, and being given one. I never asked for either shower I had, but my sister insisted both times. At both showers there were less than 10 people there, just extremely close people.
My shower was about 15 people, coed (so 6 of those people were a couple that only bought one gift,) and I only registered for 2 items over $100. And my parents are the only ones that spent more than $50. I've only known one person to register multiple times for big items and a lot of people just got small things then too. Because of this I'd also been confused about the "sprinkle" concept cause in my mind when you only spend $30 for a shower so it doesn't seem horribly egregious to have multiple ones and I didn't see how small gifts are that "gift grabby."
Despite trying to specify that this post wasn't about whether a second shower was tacky or not, I cant help but wonder at your reasoning. In both cases for me, I was offered the shower and in no way asked for it (like I said, I didn't even register). I just dont understand how family wanting to celebrate the mom and baby by throwing a little party/get together/etc that people happen to bring gifts to, makes the MOM the gift grabby one. I did nothing to encourage the showers or the gift giving.
In my mind there also comes a point where, as 'tacky' as it may be to have another shower, it's even more rude to straight up refuse peoples offers to do something for you, kwim? Like, if I want to treat a friend to a meal out and she refuses my offer to pay (and not just in that polite, "no that's ok, but thanks" way, but straight up refused), despite my willingness and genuine desire to treat her, I would be put off by that. Am I alone in that?
I've never been to a shower for a first time mom like that. All of them have been big affairs--lots of friends/family and a registry. I live in the Northeast.
With that being said, if your shower only consisted of a small amount of close family members/close friends, I don't think it's wrong to do 2 "showers"
I'd first heard of sprinkles back when I was looking at invites for my shower with DD.I really think it totally depends on the area and/or the families.
Yeah IMO that's the general idea of a shower vs. a sprinkle. Generally you do see gifts at sprinkles around here, little things like a set of onsies or a small package of diapers, or a stuffed animal. But never registries, it's considered very tacky to put registry info on a sprinkle invite. I've also seen a lot of group, big gifts. Like my cousin had a sprinkle for her second and everyone put $20 in and we got her a new stroller.
I always consider a first shower a shower and subsequent ones a sprinkle unless they're full out registries and huge blow outs... then it's shower after shower and it's really frowned up around here... it's just super gift grabby.
Oh I see. I didn't clue into the 'asking for a 2nd shower' part of what you said the first time
But I do see that a lot on here, when people who have 2nd showers get accused of being gift grabby despite the fact they didn't ask for said shower.
And yes, CurlingRocks, if it's an over the top amount of events I can understand politely but firmly refusing. But a shower among family (or my example of treating dinner) seems different than that.