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LGBT Parenting
Littlejen22
member
Lurking and wanted opinions
Littlejen22
member
I hope you ladies do not mind but I wanted opinions on something and figured this would be the best place to ask. The Chick Fil A debacle...
DS is in Kindergarten and his public school PTA is sponsoring a fundraiser today. I was pretty annoyed when I realized that they were doing a fundraiser there but did not know what to say and to whom I would address it, I joined the PTA and know a few of these ladies From around town but do not know any of them well, I have no idea if trey are clueless of just plain asses. So today DS comes home wearing a Chick Fil A sticker and begging to go there and to a fundraiser at Barnes and Nobel today. I tried to tell him that we can go to Barnes and Nobel but he is begging to do both.
So, what is your take on this? Chick Fil A has already said they will no longer be supporting that group financially do is this something I should still be mad about? I still am mad this was ever an issue but I'd they have already agreed to pull their money should I let it go? WWYD. Oh, and I only have an hour to decide, lol.
DS is in Kindergarten and his public school PTA is sponsoring a fundraiser today. I was pretty annoyed when I realized that they were doing a fundraiser there but did not know what to say and to whom I would address it, I joined the PTA and know a few of these ladies From around town but do not know any of them well, I have no idea if trey are clueless of just plain asses. So today DS comes home wearing a Chick Fil A sticker and begging to go there and to a fundraiser at Barnes and Nobel today. I tried to tell him that we can go to Barnes and Nobel but he is begging to do both.
So, what is your take on this? Chick Fil A has already said they will no longer be supporting that group financially do is this something I should still be mad about? I still am mad this was ever an issue but I'd they have already agreed to pull their money should I let it go? WWYD. Oh, and I only have an hour to decide, lol.
Jen - Mom to two December 12 babies
Nathaniel 12/12/06 and Addison 12/12/08
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Lurking and wanted opinions
While the Cathy family personally hasn't changed their views (which is fine, they're entitled, as we all are, to believe what they want) Chick-Fil-A did say they will stop donating to the anti-gay and certified hate groups they were donating to in the past. For me, this makes me rest a little easier, though I haven't seen anything proving they've actually done what they said they would do--I feel like we kind of are expected to take them at their word, which is why I still haven't eaten there since this whole thing started.
As a teacher who has used CFA fundraisers in the past, I actually have a different issue with their fundraisers--not very much of the money actually goes to the school! You have to have the flyer/sticker from the school to have your purchase go towards support, and you aren't allowed to pass out flyers/stickers at the restaurant. That meant when I did fundraiser with my students there, we put in a lot of work in advertising to only make about $150. We got a very small percentage of the actual profits.
It's your call...I'm not as mad at CFA as I was, but I still don't like or trust them very much. Just my two cents.
IVF Oct/Nov 2012
Beta #1 = 77, Beta #2 = 190, Beta #3 = 1044
Cautiously optimistic.
If anyone has a good why of explaining this type of antihate message to an almost 6 and almost 4yo please feel free to share because when it comes to "bad" things with the kids I tend to avoid and shelter which is not what I really want.
We will probably go to get pizza or McDs and them to Barnes and Noble.
Tonight I will be drafting an email to the Principal and the PTA president if I can find her email telling them why I think this fundraiser is innapropriate. In all likelihood I will send it anonymously because I am not quite sure the response it will get and honestly I am not ready to risk that at my kid's school.
I probably would have taken my child to the fundraiser even with the recent controversy just so they got to participate but had an honest conversation about our family and what we believe. I just think we have to take into consideration their comprehension level. I completely understand passing on your beliefs to your child but sometimes when they don't understand, no matter what you say all they see is they did not get to participate. Now when their friends tomorrow talk about it, they feel left out again etc. I think by telling your son what you believe and that you believe all families should be equal then you are doing a bigger service to the community than depriving CFA of your $20.
If you would like to speak to your kids, in age appropriate manner, my recommendation would be stressing that there are families of all types. Some with a mom and a dad, some with just a mom or dad, some with two moms or dads and some with grandparents, aunts, foster moms or dads etc. That a family is made up of people who love each other regardless of gender or relation. They honestly don't care what companies support and will loose interest in the conversation but if you just talk about how it doesn't matter who your family is made up of, the color of your skin etc we are all equal. That will make a much better impact. When they get older and can comprehend inequality and larger issues, you can have a more detailed conversation at that time.
In writing a letter to your principle, I would simply state that moving forward you would love for the school to continue raising money in the community for school functions but you would appreciate if all family types were considered when selecting places to patron. You understand that places may be limited that are willing to fund-raise but you would really appreciate it if other places are considered so that all family types at your school feel comfortable participating. It is really upsetting when we have to explain to our children that we are not going to attend the fundraiser because the place chosen does not support our family or someone else's family.
I would leave it simple, short and to the point. To be completely honest though, you can find something negative about any place and it's almost impossible to make everyone happy. I am not sure it is worth the battle especially if it is done anonymously. (I am not advocating marching in there face to face to explain your disappointment, and completely understand you not wanting to say anything out loud. It just doesn't carry as much weight when there is no face or name to put with it) People tend to listen more when it is personal.
06/12 - BFP!!!!
Beta #1 15dpo - 256
Beta #2 18dpo - 1097
6wk U/S on 07/02 ~ TWINS!!!
EDD 02/21/13
09/10/12 Found out it's two Boys!!!! Sam and Jake
Jacob and Samuel born 1/29/13 at 36 weeks.
As for the teaching suggestions, thanks. DS fav book is The Family Book which pretty much says exactly what is written above. And some I am Caucasian, DH is Chinese, my FIL is Caribbean Our wedding pics look like the United Nations so we have that side of things covered. We do not have any close friends in the LGBT community ironically my stepdaughters' Mom is lesbian but my SD is grown and we never see her Mom so my kids are not exposed to same sex parents often althought that will likely change as we meet more people in the elementary school.
It is amazing how raising kids makes you see things clearer and makes you want to take the right path and teach them by example. And I will admit that my son preferring "girl" things has definitely made me have a stronger opinion on these things, or rather made my opinions stronger.
I am still not sure if I am going to write a letter, DH said he has no issue with signing his name and part of me really wants to but with the huge turn out at BN including the Principal who gave my son a high five I am just not sure if I want to potentially be identified as a "trouble maker" when we just started there. Ugh.
Oh, and FWIW, it does not look like CFA is changing their policy at all, about two weeks ago Cathy reiterated his stance and that it was not changing. It sounds like old school lying Chicago politics is at play for the Alderman announcing the change, it never came from CFA from what I could find.
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/mobileweb/2012/10/03/chickfilapresidentdancathybiblicalfamilies_n_1935786.html