Adoption

Fundraising Etiquette

In hopes of accelerating our RIDICULOUSLY long agency problems, we are interviewing additional agencies. The agency that is working with us now (if you could call it that!) charges no fees except lawyer charges at time of finalization--WOW!

We talked about moving to a different agency to get us home study approved and in the waiting pool sooner, but these agencies are ones that charge for services.

We are so financially blessed, and have about 1/2 to 2/3 of the $$ we will need for an entire adoption saved up now. So, probably by the time we are placed, we could have it all saved...although it would completely wipe us out, leaving no safety net in case of job loss, etc.

How would YOU feel if we had fundraisers and asked for donations/support for our finances given you know we had enough money to cover fees? How about if you had no idea what our finances were? Just wonder how family/friends may perceive this.

Thanks!

Trying to Add Baby #1 Since 12/2008
Dx: Unexplained Infertility
Spring 2010: 3 Clomid + TI
Jan 2011: 2 Femara IUI's
Summer 2011: 6 months of Chiropractic Therapy
March 2012: Confirmed Agency, Meeting set
July 2012: Homeopath consult (fail!)
July 2012: Start of Agency Meetings/Paperwork
October 2012: Agency Interview
February 2013: Tenative Agency Training
March 2013: Tenative Homestudy start date

Re: Fundraising Etiquette

  • We did not fundraise.... but I also think it's an individual decision.

    IMO I would not feel generous in supporting a friend that was fundraising simply to keep it from wiping out a safety net.  I'd rather support someone else who might not have the financial ability to adopt if it weren't for fundraising.

    That said, you know your family and friends best.  How would they respond? If you have hesitation, it's probably  not a good idea.  If you have no reservations, then go for it :)

    image Best friends and sisters... 24 months and 16 months
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  • IMo it depends a lot on how you approach it and how your friends/family typically resond to fundraisers.

    Selling stuff, starting an Etsy store, giant yard sale, etc? Sure. Having friends/family offer $ spontaneously, and accepting? Sure. Sending me a letter saying, "Our adoption is going to cost $X, please give us $?" Rubs me the wrong way.

  • Hmmmm good thoughts. Thanks for sharing! I do feel uneasy about it. Perhaps that's my red flag right there.
    Trying to Add Baby #1 Since 12/2008
    Dx: Unexplained Infertility
    Spring 2010: 3 Clomid + TI
    Jan 2011: 2 Femara IUI's
    Summer 2011: 6 months of Chiropractic Therapy
    March 2012: Confirmed Agency, Meeting set
    July 2012: Homeopath consult (fail!)
    July 2012: Start of Agency Meetings/Paperwork
    October 2012: Agency Interview
    February 2013: Tenative Agency Training
    March 2013: Tenative Homestudy start date
  • imageDr.Loretta:
    IMo it depends a lot on how you approach it and how your friends/family typically resond to fundraisers.
    Selling stuff, starting an Etsy store, giant yard sale, etc? Sure. Having friends/family offer spontaneously, and accepting? Sure. Sending me a letter saying, "Our adoption is going to cost X, please give us ?" Rubs me the wrong way.


    Totally ditto
    Married on 3.20.2004. It took 30 month, 2 failed adoptions and IVF for our first miracle. We have had 9 foster kids since he was born and started the domestic adoption process when he was 10 month old, we had 4 failed matches in that time. After our daughter was born we brought her home and spent 2 weeks fearing we might lose her because of complications that came up. But Praise God all went through and she is ours forever! Expecting again after IVF Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Pregnancy Ticker Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers image
  • imageMayDayGirl:
    imageDr.Loretta:
    IMo it depends a lot on how you approach it and how your friends/family typically resond to fundraisers. Selling stuff, starting an Etsy store, giant yard sale, etc? Sure. Having friends/family offer spontaneously, and accepting? Sure. Sending me a letter saying, "Our adoption is going to cost X, please give us ?" Rubs me the wrong way.
    Totally ditto

    Yes 

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