Community› The Bump Month Clubs› October 2011 Moms
October 2011 Moms
New Discussion

Is this my problem? Re: DS1's bday

mattandbekahmattandbekah
in October 2011 Moms

So...I found out today that my MIL is very upset b/c she has plans on the day that we are going to have Jack's 3rd bday party.  I feel bad, but we asked them previously if they were going to be in town (they have a house in FL that they go to pretty often). They said they would be gone the weekend of the 10th (his bday is the 6th) so we are having the party Nov. 3rd. 

I do feel bad that she has plans she cant get out of, but I also feel like she knows when her grandsons birthday is, and she scheduled different things for BOTH of the weekends that we could realistically have it.  

She isnt saying anything like "reschedule the party" but we are kind of getting a major guilt trip.  Im not rescheduling, I really cant.  

Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
Report Reply to Post

Re: Is this my problem? Re: DS1's bday

  • FianschneidFianschneid member

    No. This is not your problem. You told her the date options. She is an adult and made plans. You will never find a date that is perfect for everyone.

    She can have a special lunch or trip to the park or whatever with him when she is available if she wants to celebrate.

    imageimageBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Burned by the Bear
    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • nicki731nicki731
    I don't think you did anything wrong, you did what you could based on what she told you. We had a similar situation where my MIL planned to go on vacation the week of G's birthday, so she told us she wouldn't be available Oct 20-21. His b-day is the 22. So I made his party for the 27, and she said they weren't planning on coming back from vacation until that day. Um hello.... like you said, they should know when the kid's birthday is! My MIL apologized though and they decided to come home from vacation a day early so she could be at his party.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • Elsa1984Elsa1984 member
    If she told you she was going to be gone one date and changed it, that is not your problem. As much as it sucks, you can't make all of your plans around everyone else's schedule. And if she told you she was going to be in town the dates before Jack's party but then she changes her mind, oh well.

    We had the same issue when it came to Gator's birthday. Her birthday is on the 30th and the venue was only available the 23rd or the 28th....but the owners were having a Halloween party the 27th and there would be Halloween decorations up. My parents were going to be gone the weekend after the 30th so I couldn't do it that weekend. I scheduled for the 23rd and then found out my inlaws weren't back from their vacation they had booked before Gator was born, until the 24th. So I called and changed the reservations to the 28th and since I changed it to accommodate both my parents and my inlaws, they are all going to be helping take down the Halloween party decorations so they aren't up during Gator's party.
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic 
    Report Reply
  • kagl08kagl08 member
    You told her the date and she made plans regardless. So no it's not your problem. MILs suck sometimes. I'm sure Jack will have a good party regardless. Like PP said, she can spend a special day with his some other time. Enjoy your day with or without her.
    Report Reply
  • pennysuedogpennysuedog

    What? Wait! Do we have the same MIL?

    siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894 photo siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894-1_zpscf1469c3.jpg
    Report Reply
  • ChunstadChunstad member

    Oops!  Sorry, MIL, hopefully next year you can plan better!  This is TOTALLY not your problem.

    image
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
    Report Reply
  • ScramblersmomScramblersmom member
    imageFianschneid:

    No. This is not your problem. You told her the date options. She is an adult and made plans. You will never find a date that is perfect for everyone.

    She can have a special lunch or trip to the park or whatever with him when she is available if she wants to celebrate.

    Agree 100%. Do not take ownership of that guilt. She made the choice so now it is up to her if she wants to come see him another time or during the week. 

    image"width="200px"> Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    Report Reply
  • mrs.lizziebmrs.lizzieb
    Definitely not your problem.  SHE should feel guilty for scheduling stuff on the two possible weekends.  My ILs scheduled a cruise for DD's birthday weekend.  I was a little surprised that they'd go on vacation that weekend, but whatever.  My MIL feels pretty guilty and so they came in September to visit since they can't be here for the party.  Your MIL should be feeling the guilt trip, not dishing it!
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"