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Attachment Parenting
4 year old wants to share our bed, #2 on the way
We did not bedshare with dd. She was in a pack n play in our room for about 6 weeks and then in her own room, in her crib.
With this baby, I want to try a sidecrib.
The problem we are having is that our 4 year old dd comes into our room about half way through the night. We've tried everything to get her to stay in her own, very comfortable, very nice, full size bed, but she's just not having it. She definitely sleeps more soundly and longer when snuggled in between us, but I feel she is more than old enough to be in her own bed.
So I am concerned that 1, she's too old and 2, it won't be safe having both an almost 5 year old and a newborn in our bed.
Suggestions? Thoughts?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: 4 year old wants to share our bed, #2 on the way
We tried everything too. Nothing worked to keep DD1 in her bed all night until she was ready.
We did bedshare with DD1, but by the time she was 3-4 months old, she was starting the night out in her crib. She'd just always come to bed with us when she first woke up.
When DD2 was born, it just wasn't safe to bedshare with a newborn and a 4 yo. We have a small couch in our room, so we set that up as a bed and let DD1 come sleep there when she woke up in the middle of the night. That way she could still be close to us, but she wasn't actually in our bed.
Right around the time she turned 5, she started STTN. I have no idea what changed. I guess that was just the time she was ready. She will still occasionally wake up, but DH just brings her back to her bed and tucks her back in.
DD2 is still partially bed sharing with us. I'm not sure what we're going to do when the baby comes. She'll be just over 2.5 years, and I'm sure she won't really be ready to sleep by herself all night. My plan it to let DH figure things out with her while I take care of the baby.
Charlotte Ella 07.16.10
Emmeline Grace 03.27.13
She got a huge makeover at Christmastime, 9 months ago. That didn't seem to work!
More Green For Less Green
Ok good to know, that would probably work. Thank you!
I was really worried about this when I was pregnant, too. We have done several things during the three months since Baby Bug was born...
We started by setting up a crazy bed-We have a king sized bed, squished next to a twin, and then a side-carred crib. The twin mattress is about three inches higher than the crib and the king. The crib and twin are about the same firmness, but the king has a soft, memory foam topper. I feel like Baby Bug is safe in the twin and the crib, but not in the king. However, the king is SO much more comfortable than the twin...
Anyway, Shy Bear sleeps between DH and I on the king. (Every once in a while, she will sleep in the crib or on a nest on the floor, but 95% of the time, she is on the king.) Baby Bug generally nurses for a while on the twin, either falls asleep nursing or shortly after I get up to do something else. I don't worry about her rolling into the crib, because I feel like it is a safe sleeping space for her. There aren't any gaps or crevices that she can get stuck in and I don't think the place where the mattresses are pushed against each other is a safety hazard. I usually block her other side with a big, hardcover book, so she can't slide or roll into the king bed. I move back and forth between the king and the single bed. When Baby Bug needs wakes up during the night, I sleep with her, otherwise, I sleep in the king with a hand on Bug...