Natural Birth

Can Anyone Relate? (No real point to this post :)

My cousin whom I'm really close to (she was the MOH in our wedding) just found out she's pregnant with her first.  I am so excited for her and we are ecstatic to be pregnant at the same time.  Her mother had four out of five of her kids med-free and I know this is something that has always been important to her as well.  After my first experience with Hypnobirthing my cousin decided that was the route she wanted to take as well.  

So even before becoming pregnant she has always known she wanted to do her best to have a med-free birth.  She is sticking with her OB and delivering at a hospital that I think is probably middle of the road in terms of intervention, not natural birth friendly, but not a c-section factory either.  I just want to be like, switch to my MWs and deliver at my hospital that is known for being one of the most natural birth friendly hospitals in the Chicagoland area!  She mentioned that her doctor said, "They won't let their patients go beyond 41w." Which I know is getting more and more common these days, so that's not a red flag in my mind.  But I just felt like saying, "She won't LET you?  Well too bad because the choice is ultimately yours to make!"   My cousin already had an u/s at 7 weeks, but the doctor said if she wanted to come back at 9 weeks to take another peak just for fun then she could.  No medical reason, which the paranoid side of me says, here we go with unnecessary medical procedures!

I keep telling myself this is not my baby, not my pregnancy and these are not my decisions to make.  But it's so hard to not make suggestions based on my own experiences.  Anyway, as I said in the title there's really no point to this post.  Just had to get it out!  

Re: Can Anyone Relate? (No real point to this post :)

  • I can totally identify with this, especially this part:

    I keep telling myself this is not my baby, not my pregnancy and these are not my decisions to make.  But it's so hard to not make suggestions based on my own experiences.

    I had a good friend who wasn't planning to take a natural birth route (which is totally fine, that wasn't the problem!), but I noticed several red flags during her pregnancy from her doctor.  I finally gently mentioned that maybe she needed to be aware to keep an eye on what her doctor would do towards the end of her pregnancy, but she didn't heed my advice.  She ended up with a scheduled C/S at 39 weeks for a baby that was "too big" (estimated to be 10+lbs) and came out 8lbs2oz.  I guess the good thing is that although she was slightly annoyed with the situation she certainly didn't have the level of anger/regret towards her doctor that I would have in her situation.  I definitely count that as a positive in a situation like this.

    It's hard when you're educated/experienced about these things to watch people you care about take a path you wouldn't really choose (i.e. things like their provider when they have a better option).  It's a touchy thing and unfortunately it's not really seen as positive to share well-intentioned , but unsolicited info.  It's like people have to seek it out for themselves or you're being pushy/judgy, but at the same time because we as women don't openly discuss these things a lot of people don't even realize it's an issue.  It's a vicious cycle.  

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  • I know how hard that can be! I'm in Chicagoland too. The hospitals close to me are NOT natural birth friendly.

    So when I hear about my friends wanting to deliver there I can only offer support. I just used an OB, I didn't deliver there. (homebirth) But I give her my experience with an the OB and they are big girls and can make their own decisions. But I agree it is hard!

     

    Just curious, what part of the burbs? North, west, or south? 

    Mommy to Emery Vera 5.20.12  Blog
  • imagevintagejjane:

    I know how hard that can be! I'm in Chicagoland too. The hospitals close to me are NOT natural birth friendly.

    So when I hear about my friends wanting to deliver there I can only offer support. I just used an OB, I didn't deliver there. (homebirth) But I give her my experience with an the OB and they are big girls and can make their own decisions. But I agree it is hard!

     

    Just curious, what part of the burbs? North, west, or south? 

    I live in the city and delivered here (Swedish).  My cousin lives in the city as well but will be delivering in the northern suburbs.  

  • Eeek. If it's Lake Forest, I would just give her the advice to educate herself because of the docs. I know one l&d nurse there, and she is SO supportive of natural birth. But if she goes in there knowing what she wants then I think she will be ok! 
    Mommy to Emery Vera 5.20.12  Blog
  • I am SO happy to see this - I am also in Chicago and up until we found out we were having twins, I was set on West Suburban  Midwives and their gorgeous alternative rooms... really wanted a water birth.  Now it seems like every way that I turn I'm being told that I'm high risk, need to schedule a c-section, etc.  I'm so frustrated!  I emailed the midwives at Swedish but they told me they won't work with twins, that I would have to work directly with an OB there.  My RE does deliver there but he's not the most open to the natural side of things.  If you have any advice for me, I would be so grateful!!!!  I would ideally like to go natural and not be induced and also be able to move around during labor, not be strapped to a fetal monitor and stuck pushing in the OR.  Not sure if this is possible with twins though.  :(
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  • Twins might be considered high risk these days, but that shouldn't automatically make you need a csection. Research, and try and find other mom's who delivered naturally with twins. Try the multiples board and see if any of them have gone through it naturally as well! Lots of luck!
    Mommy to Emery Vera 5.20.12  Blog
  • I was in the same situation as you were. A friend was due around the same time as I was and we were both planning to go natural. I encouraged her to look into my NB friendly hospital and she did, but ultimately stuck with the hospital in her neighborhood and her OB. The end result? I had the exact natural birth I wanted and she had a csection.

    But, and here's the big but. I can't say she didn't do her research because in some ways she was even more prepared than I was. She had a doula and took Bradley classes. She read the books and was fully committed to it. She just got unlucky: a 40 hour labor, a baby that never descended. Would delivering with a midwife have made a difference? Sometimes I wonder but ultimately I know that birth can be unpredictable and I'm sure she made the best decision for her situation. It's hubris to think that just because we choose a certain way that it's always the best path for everyone. It could have just have easily been the reverse outcome for me and my friend.

    And FWIW, my OB did three ultrasounds in the first trimester as standard practice but did not push any interventions during labor. I wouldn't necessarily rush to judgment.
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  • imageslindell13:
    I am SO happy to see this - I am also in Chicago and up until we found out we were having twins, I was set on West Suburban  Midwives and their gorgeous alternative rooms... really wanted a water birth.  Now it seems like every way that I turn I'm being told that I'm high risk, need to schedule a c-section, etc.  I'm so frustrated!  I emailed the midwives at Swedish but they told me they won't work with twins, that I would have to work directly with an OB there.  My RE does deliver there but he's not the most open to the natural side of things.  If you have any advice for me, I would be so grateful!!!!  I would ideally like to go natural and not be induced and also be able to move around during labor, not be strapped to a fetal monitor and stuck pushing in the OR.  Not sure if this is possible with twins though.  :(

    Swedish is great, but my only experience is with the MWs.  They are so natural birth minded that nobody even asked me to get a saline lock, much less any other interventions!  But I know it's different with twins.  I can't speak for the OBs, but it might help to be at a hospital where at least the atmosphere is geared more toward med-free births.  On the flip side of that though they only have a Level II nursery, no NICU, which might weigh in to your decision.  

    Prentice is not exactly known for being low-intervention, but I do know a woman who had a med-free birth with twins there.  Her doctor would only attempt a vaginal if they were both head-down, which they were.  She had never intended to go without pain meds, but got there fully dilated and after two failed attempts at an epi her doctor encouraged her to go without.  Which is what she did.  Oh and hopefully you would never need it, but Prentice has a NICU.  

    Hope this helps a little! 

  • My last pregnancy was twins, and I'd be happy to share my experience. What I ended up doing was sort of leaning in to the idea that, with two babies to deliver, a lot of labor and delivery was just plain going to be out of my control--even moreso than normal. I decided that what was really important to me was to try whatever I could try to not have a c-section. Accordingly I chose a practice of high-risk OBs (MFM specialists). Why? Because every provider at that practice was trained in and comfortable with delivering a breech baby B. Even if you head into labor with both babies head down, once baby A is out there's lots of room in there, and there's a decent chance baby B will flip. I really wanted to deliver both vaginally, so I figured my best bet was to choose a practice in which every provider who might possibly be attending the birth of my twins is trained in and comfortable with delivering a breech baby B. 

    In my area, that meant this practice of MFMs. And so I went with them even though they are by no means natural-birth-focused, and even though they actually deliver at one of the hospitals in my area with the highest c-section rates. I was clear throughout my pregnancy that my main priority was to avoid surgery. My birth plan upon arrival at the hospital said something like, "I would like to avoid a c-section; I understand that with multiples a lot of this is out of my control, but I would appreciate your help in making choices that will help me avoid a c-section." And that's it. And they did help me make those choices, and I did push both of my babies out vaginally. I had just about every other intervention in the book, but I did get them out vaginally, so I don't regret any of it. It totally could have gone the other way, but I did feel like I'd done everything I could to prepare for what was most important to me, so I felt at peace headed into labor and delivery.

    This time I'm pregnant with just one and with a low-risk pregnancy I'm researching very differently and planning very differently. But that's what *I* did with the twin thing, fwiw. Also fwiw, I do know of one or two twin moms who delivered vaginally with no meds.

    Also, the c-section rate for twins in this country is about 50%, which is way higher than it should be, but by no means is it 100% so if you have people telling you to schedule a c-section without a medical reason for doing so, just keep that in mind.

    If I were you I would just interview a bunch of different providers and see what feels best to you. Good luck and congrats on your twins!

    imageslindell13:
    I am SO happy to see this - I am also in Chicago and up until we found out we were having twins, I was set on West Suburban  Midwives and their gorgeous alternative rooms... really wanted a water birth.  Now it seems like every way that I turn I'm being told that I'm high risk, need to schedule a c-section, etc.  I'm so frustrated!  I emailed the midwives at Swedish but they told me they won't work with twins, that I would have to work directly with an OB there.  My RE does deliver there but he's not the most open to the natural side of things.  If you have any advice for me, I would be so grateful!!!!  I would ideally like to go natural and not be induced and also be able to move around during labor, not be strapped to a fetal monitor and stuck pushing in the OR.  Not sure if this is possible with twins though.  :(
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  • imagesschwege:

    I keep telling myself this is not my baby, not my pregnancy and these are not my decisions to make.  But it's so hard to not make suggestions based on my own experiences.  Anyway, as I said in the title there's really no point to this post.  Just had to get it out!  

    Yep. One of my good friends is pregnant with her first, and she's pretty worried about labor and birth in general (as in, has to leave the room when other moms talk in very general terms about their births). I think she's getting a teeny bit better, and I have told her outright she needs to have some sort of plan (we're close enough that I can say it), but that's all I can do. Oh, I tell her I have thousands of hippie books to read if she wants.

    She also said she doesn't want to be pregnant a day past 40 weeks - aaaaah! (and this isn't doctor-sanctioned, just from her). I told her that it's not up to her at this point, hee hee. 

    Anyhoo, I remind myself to support her and be there for whatever she wants, even if it's nothing!

    DS1 - Feb 2008

    DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)

  • imageslindell13:
    I am SO happy to see this - I am also in Chicago and up until we found out we were having twins, I was set on West Suburban  Midwives and their gorgeous alternative rooms... really wanted a water birth.  Now it seems like every way that I turn I'm being told that I'm high risk, need to schedule a c-section, etc.  I'm so frustrated!  I emailed the midwives at Swedish but they told me they won't work with twins, that I would have to work directly with an OB there.  My RE does deliver there but he's not the most open to the natural side of things.  If you have any advice for me, I would be so grateful!!!!  I would ideally like to go natural and not be induced and also be able to move around during labor, not be strapped to a fetal monitor and stuck pushing in the OR.  Not sure if this is possible with twins though.  :(

    UIC might, definitely call them and ask!

    Join the Chicago ICAN list and ask there - https://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/ICANofChicago/?yguid=431773075

    DS1 - Feb 2008

    DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)

  • Thank you so much to all the ladies who weighed-in with twin stories and experiences - I feel like I at least have 3 or 4 good directions to explore now.  I'm so glad I stumbled upon this post!!!!!!
    BabyFruit Ticker
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