We are also not calling anyone until after the baby is born, mostly because I want bonding time with my baby afterwards. I know that DH family will be outside with their ears pressed to the door just waiting to come in and that is not gonna happen.
Having a baby is a private experience between two people, NOT a family affair.
This is exactly how I feel as well. People will be getting a baby's here call NOT a baby's on the way.
We dealt with this, too. We are planning on a home birth, so in-laws assumed this meant a birth party at our house... I nonchalantly mentioned, "One of the main reasons I want to labor and deliver at home is because I want this to be a private and intimate family affair. Visitors will be welcome after we've all been able to enjoy the newest little one as a family." I had to further explain that extended family was included in "visitors".... ie, No, MIL, you will not be watching me deliver this grandchild. We still get some questions about our choice, but I'm standing firm (so is hubby!)
Birth is extremely personal- don't let anyone let you feel guilty about your own PERSONAL decisions for your child and your family. Nobody else should make these decisions for you. Just tell them kindly that you value their input and their support, but that your family has decided to do things a little differently and is requesting visitors wait in the waiting room.
Happily married since 2009
Roo, 8y Birdie, 4y Jem, 3y Vee, 1y Baby Bee DUE April 2018
I will never understand this. When I deliver our baby girl it will be me, DH and our doula. Both mothers would love to be there, and they are some of my best friends, but I just don't believe this is a group moment.
To each her own, but the thought of having an "audience" in the delivery room makes me cringe.
We are so thankful that our second daughter, Lillian Elizabeth "Lily", was born healthy and happy on February 11, 2013. We love her to pieces.
We lost our first daughter, Hannah Grace on May 4, 2011. She was buried on May 14 during a beautiful service at my home church. We are grateful that if she could not be here with us, that she is healed and whole with the Lord. We look forward to the day when we will get to meet her. We love her so much.
I used to think I didn't want anyone in the room with me but my SO.. Now I think I've decided I at least want my mom and SO's mom in there with us. Since I am starting to think SO might not be able to make it through delivery. haha! Not by himself, at least. He gets a little queasy around that type of thing...
In the end, I think I only want my mom and future MIL.. MAYBE SO's aunt if she can stay calm about it. I guess when it comes down to delivery, I'll make the final decision on who gets in and who doesn't. lol Depends on my mood and how I feel.
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Re: Delivery room audience...?
This is exactly how I feel as well. People will be getting a baby's here call NOT a baby's on the way.
Perfect! I love that answer!
Birdie, 4y
Jem, 3y
Vee, 1y
Baby Bee DUE April 2018
We dealt with this, too. We are planning on a home birth, so in-laws assumed this meant a birth party at our house... I nonchalantly mentioned, "One of the main reasons I want to labor and deliver at home is because I want this to be a private and intimate family affair. Visitors will be welcome after we've all been able to enjoy the newest little one as a family." I had to further explain that extended family was included in "visitors".... ie, No, MIL, you will not be watching me deliver this grandchild. We still get some questions about our choice, but I'm standing firm (so is hubby!)
Birth is extremely personal- don't let anyone let you feel guilty about your own PERSONAL decisions for your child and your family. Nobody else should make these decisions for you. Just tell them kindly that you value their input and their support, but that your family has decided to do things a little differently and is requesting visitors wait in the waiting room.
Birdie, 4y
Jem, 3y
Vee, 1y
Baby Bee DUE April 2018
I will never understand this. When I deliver our baby girl it will be me, DH and our doula. Both mothers would love to be there, and they are some of my best friends, but I just don't believe this is a group moment.
To each her own, but the thought of having an "audience" in the delivery room makes me cringe.
We are so thankful that our second daughter, Lillian Elizabeth "Lily", was born healthy and happy on February 11, 2013. We love her to pieces.
We lost our first daughter, Hannah Grace on May 4, 2011. She was buried on May 14 during a beautiful service at my home church. We are grateful that if she could not be here with us, that she is healed and whole with the Lord. We look forward to the day when we will get to meet her. We love her so much.
I used to think I didn't want anyone in the room with me but my SO.. Now I think I've decided I at least want my mom and SO's mom in there with us. Since I am starting to think SO might not be able to make it through delivery. haha! Not by himself, at least. He gets a little queasy around that type of thing...
In the end, I think I only want my mom and future MIL.. MAYBE SO's aunt if she can stay calm about it. I guess when it comes down to delivery, I'll make the final decision on who gets in and who doesn't. lol Depends on my mood and how I feel.