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I don't want to know my numbers

J&D2007J&D2007 member
in Infertility
I tend to be a slightly anxious person about medical testing. I tend to over analyze, over-google, compare my test results with you all, etc. Over the last few months with my CP and with the iui's, I've been obsessing about follicle sizes, progesterone numbers, betas, etc. As I'm sure every one of us has. When I went in for my Ivf consult, there was a sticky note on my chart that said FSH 5.4 and antral follicle count numbers. I have RPL bloodwork this week and are repeating every test known to man.  I am thinking I may not want to know every number. If I think about it, it just stresses me out. Maybe I can just trust my RE when she says 'everything looks good' and just carry on without the added stress of wondering if a number is slightly high or low? Smart to reduce stress and trust your RE or smarter to gather all the info you can?
Me: 37, DH: 38: ttc 7 years, dx: unknown
10/11: after 2 years, saw a RE, FSH 5.4
11/11: BFP! (surprise after thyroid & normal hsg),
12/11: missed m/c after 7 week u/s, 1/12: D&C
6/12 IUI#1-IUI #3: clomid = BFP!, C/P
IVF #1(10/12) FSH 5.4, AFC: 16 long Lupron, 5R/5M/4F, all 4 made it to 5dt, 1 blast/1-8 cell transferred=BFN
IVF #2(12/12)AFC 21, MD lupron, 4R/4M/3F, 5dt of 1 blast and 2-8cell. BFN.
IVF#3(4/13) Natural start antagon protocol, 12R,11F. one PGS normal at day 6 transfer. BFN.
IVF#4 (11/13) C.CRM (ODW.U normal 8/13 Still no Diagnosis) EPP/antagonist. ER 13R/7M/6F. Only 1 made it to freeze. Abnormal. Looking into options of DE, Fresh vs frozen.
10/14 new local RE to look into what's next. CD3 FSH 4.7, AMH 0.9. Met with DE agencies and exploring options for feb/march 2015.
Surprise natural bfp (4 days before donor is signed). Beta #1 at 9dpo: 51.8, 2nd beta: 195 (25 hours doubling) @11dpo. 3rd beta (12/15): 516 (35 hrs doubling) 4th beta(12/17): 895 (58 hours doubling) 5th beta(12/19): 2120. U/S at 5w0d(12/22): one gestational sac with yolk sac. U/S #2 (6w0d)12/29. One little bean measuring 6w0d with HR 124. 3rd u/s(1/4)7w0d: baby measuring 7w2d. HR 134. 3/30: A/S at MFM went great except for low lying placenta. Verifi results are normal! Team Blue! Please send any positive thoughts our way! EDD:8/24/2015
Baby Will born 8/18. He's perfect.
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Re: I don't want to know my numbers

  • LIQueenLIQueen

    imageJ&D2007:
    I tend to be a slightly anxious person about medical testing. I tend to over analyze, over-google, compare my test results with you all, etc. Over the last few months with my CP and with the iui's, I've been obsessing about follicle sizes, progesterone numbers, betas, etc. As I'm sure every one of us has. When I went in for my Ivf consult, there was a sticky note on my chart that said FSH 5.4 and antral follicle count numbers. I have RPL bloodwork this week and are repeating every test known to man.  I am thinking I may not want to know every number. If I think about it, it just stresses me out. Maybe I can just trust my RE when she says 'everything looks good' and just carry on without the added stress of wondering if a number is slightly high or low? Smart to reduce stress and trust your RE or smarter to gather all the info you can?

     

    What I come to realize is that these doctors will not tell you numbers look good when they don't.  If you have a great number, just trust the doctor.  If it was not a great number they would tell you that they needed to wait for the number to rise or do something else to make that happen.  They are wanting to get a baby out of all this for you, so you need to trust them when they say something is a good number or not a good number.  They have the same goal as we do.  A baby :) 

    7/18/12-1st RE appointment CD2 blood work taken. Told to move straight to IVF. Starting BC pills and FSH injections plus Lupron. Hopefully doing ET in September Off BCP March 2011 Started TTC July 2011 7 months TTC with no luck an then.... Diagnosed 2/24/12 with 2 Ovarian Cysts. 3/22/12-Lap to remove cysts, look for endo, and see if tubes are clear. 3/22/12-Diagnosed with Severe Endo(tubes are clear). 4/4/12-Post op OBGYN appointment. Told chances of conceiving naturally are very low, but told conceiving in the next few months is our best chance due to being cleaned out during Lap. Referred to a RE. RE said IVF is our only chance to get pregnant. Told only a 20% chance even with two put in. 9/5-Lupron 9/20 Stims(Menopur & Follistim) 9/30 Trigger time 10/2 ER 10/3 fert report-out of 7 eggs retrieved only 2 fertilized. Hello "Thing 1 and Thing 2!" Kinda sad there is none to freeze. Because only 2 we will have 2DT to get them back into a natural envionment 10/4 ET. Found out that only 1 divided. We love you "Thing 2." Thing 1 is now snuggled inside me and we are praying it will be our take home baby! **Did not even make it to my beta, the day before on 10/16/12 I got my F'in period** Such a stab in the heart. Nov 2012-Moving onto domestic newborn adoption! Can't wait for my take home baby. We will try IVF again after 1-2 years of a clear head. Need a break from infertility treatments/issues for my mental sanity! image
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  • lisagab26lisagab26 member

    I am very much like you.  I obsess and make myself sick over the numbers.  After 2 IVFs, I've learned that honing in on every single detail along the way does nothing for the end result.  What will be will be.  For IVF#1 I wanted to know everything, and obsessed day in and day out.  IVF#2 I chose to not ask for more info than what they offered, and tried to not look too much into the numbers, the fact that I was stimming slowly, etc.  It made for a much less stressful process for me (and was a much better cycle with a BFP).  

    I highly recommend just keeping it to a minimum and going with the flow of their orders.   And though I am the worst offender - STAY AWAY FROM THE GOOGLE!!

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  • Mayzie15Mayzie15 member
    I do a little if both. I trusted my RE a little and would google and drive myself crazy. We didn't have a successful IVF and in doing research that's why we chose to change clinics and REs. At a certain level you have to chose what's right for you but trusting your RE is really important. Good Luck!!!

    Me 38 MH 41 - TTC since June 2010 - dx with Severe MFI. Straight to IVF with ICSI. IVF #1 - ER 06/13/12 - 9 Eggs Retrieved - 4 ICSI'd - only 2 fert. 06/15/12 - 2DT - 3 cell & 6 cell with fragmentation. Beta 06/29/12 - IVF #1 = BFN. 07/20/12 - WTF Appt -Told by our RE to quit IVF. Second Opinion from RE is good. IVF#2 - November 2012. Estradiol Pills Started 11/6. Stims start 11/16. ER 11/26 - 7 eggs retrieved - all mature. 4 fertilized with ICSI. ET 11/29 Transferred 3 embryos. Beta is 12/10. 1st Beta 81 2nd Beta 160 and 3rd beta 360!!! First U/S 12/21/12 - We saw one beautiful gest. sac. 2nd U/S is 01/04/2013 - H/B 183 02/05/13 - NT Scan - everything looks good and IT'S A BOY!  Aiden was born 08/20/2013.

    IVF #2 is in progress.  ER was 05/12/14 - 11 eggs retrieved, 8 fertilized with ICSI.  ET was 05/15/14 - we transferred 3 embryos as we did on the cycle my son was conceived.  We were able to freeze 3 embryos. Beta is scheduled for 05/26/14.  1st beta - 111.  2nd beta - 159 didn't double :( 3rd beta Friday 5/30) - not a lot of hope left. Beta # 3 is 247 - probably ectopic.  Beta # 4 is 813 - possibly vanishing multiple sydrome?  06/05/14 - 5w4days - first U/S - we see a gestational sac and yolk - still have hope!  06/17/14 - 7w1day - U/S and saw and heard the heartbeat - Finally!  06/27/14 - 8w4days - Baby and heartbeat look and sound great :)  EDD 02/01/14 and It's a boy!


     "Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end."


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  • nikkilou10nikkilou10 member
    imagelisagab26:
    I am very much like you. nbsp;I obsess and make myself sick over the numbers. nbsp;After 2 IVFs, I've learned that honing in on every single detail along the way does nothing for the end result. nbsp;What will be will be. nbsp;For IVF1 I wanted to know everything, and obsessed day in and day out. nbsp;IVF2 I chose to not ask for more info than what they offered, and tried to not look too much into the numbers, the fact that I was stimming slowly, etc. nbsp;It made for a much less stressful process for me and was a much better cycle with a BFP. nbsp;I highly recommend just keeping it to a minimum and going with the flow of their orders. nbsp; And though I am the worst offender STAY AWAY FROM THE GOOGLE!!

    This. Stay away from Dr. Google!
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  • J&D2007J&D2007 member
    imagelisagab26:

    I am very much like you.  I obsess and make myself sick over the numbers.  After 2 IVFs, I've learned that honing in on every single detail along the way does nothing for the end result.  What will be will be.  For IVF#1 I wanted to know everything, and obsessed day in and day out.  IVF#2 I chose to not ask for more info than what they offered, and tried to not look too much into the numbers, the fact that I was stimming slowly, etc.  It made for a much less stressful process for me (and was a much better cycle with a BFP).  

    I highly recommend just keeping it to a minimum and going with the flow of their orders.   And though I am the worst offender - STAY AWAY FROM THE GOOGLE!!

    This is my new plan I think. Just go with the flow. If they say it's good, then it's good right? I will take the numbers they want me to have, but not keep asking for everything.  That isnwhyni pay them the big bucks, right? They can sort it all out and I can hopefully stay slighty oblivious but much less stressed out!


    Me: 37, DH: 38: ttc 7 years, dx: unknown
    10/11: after 2 years, saw a RE, FSH 5.4
    11/11: BFP! (surprise after thyroid & normal hsg),
    12/11: missed m/c after 7 week u/s, 1/12: D&C
    6/12 IUI#1-IUI #3: clomid = BFP!, C/P
    IVF #1(10/12) FSH 5.4, AFC: 16 long Lupron, 5R/5M/4F, all 4 made it to 5dt, 1 blast/1-8 cell transferred=BFN
    IVF #2(12/12)AFC 21, MD lupron, 4R/4M/3F, 5dt of 1 blast and 2-8cell. BFN.
    IVF#3(4/13) Natural start antagon protocol, 12R,11F. one PGS normal at day 6 transfer. BFN.
    IVF#4 (11/13) C.CRM (ODW.U normal 8/13 Still no Diagnosis) EPP/antagonist. ER 13R/7M/6F. Only 1 made it to freeze. Abnormal. Looking into options of DE, Fresh vs frozen.
    10/14 new local RE to look into what's next. CD3 FSH 4.7, AMH 0.9. Met with DE agencies and exploring options for feb/march 2015.
    Surprise natural bfp (4 days before donor is signed). Beta #1 at 9dpo: 51.8, 2nd beta: 195 (25 hours doubling) @11dpo. 3rd beta (12/15): 516 (35 hrs doubling) 4th beta(12/17): 895 (58 hours doubling) 5th beta(12/19): 2120. U/S at 5w0d(12/22): one gestational sac with yolk sac. U/S #2 (6w0d)12/29. One little bean measuring 6w0d with HR 124. 3rd u/s(1/4)7w0d: baby measuring 7w2d. HR 134. 3/30: A/S at MFM went great except for low lying placenta. Verifi results are normal! Team Blue! Please send any positive thoughts our way! EDD:8/24/2015
    Baby Will born 8/18. He's perfect.
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  • KershnicKershnic member
    There have been a lot of things where I've googled and gotten freaked out and then realized that other people's interpretations were based on things that didn't apply to me.  I still like to know my numbers on the things I know how to interpret, but I try very hard to take dr. google with a big grain of salt.  For your sanity I'd suggest the same!
    TTC with PCOS since July 2011.
    IVF Oct/Nov 2012
    Beta #1 = 77, Beta #2 = 190, Beta #3 = 1044
    Cautiously optimistic.
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  • mandac033mandac033 member
    I do the exact same thing. I go crazy when they give me any number because I go right to the computer and look up everything possibly about what the number is suppose to be and compare it to mine. I completely agree and would rather not know any numbers (except betas) and just have faith that they're telling me the truth. 
    <a href="http://s18.photobucket.com/albums/b102/mandac033/?action=view
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  • Scoop77Scoop77 member
    I don't want to know my numbers, either. I asked what my beta was during my miscarriage and they asked me whether or not I really wanted to know. I didn't find out and I don't regret it. I would always compare those unsuccessful beta numbers to any future pregnancy and if they were even slightly similar, I would freak out like crazy. Knowing your numbers can't change anything, it just sends you right to the arms of Dr. Google. And Dr. Google has done me wrong before so I'm trying to avoid him.
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