Dads & Dads-to-be

How Did You Take The News?

I told my bf I was pregnant yesterday and it was not planned. We've been together for 4 years and he has a 8 year old son. This will be our first child together. I was excited and he wasnt so excited. Is this normal for men and unplanned pregnancies? Should I be worried? 

Re: How Did You Take The News?

  • Everybody is different.

    My wife was not excited at first at all (ours was unplanned). I got over the initial shock after about 6 minutes and have been excited ever since.

    Just give him some time. :)

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  • Since this is the internet, I can be blunt:

    Were you actively preventing pregnancy? On the Pill? Using Condoms? Or were just using the "Pull out" method?

    If you were on the pill, I can certainly understand him being concerned and a bit confused. On the other hand, he's obviously old enough to understand if you were having unprotected sex, a baby is a likely outcome.

    Often times a woman's first reaction is "Yay, baby!" while a man's first reaction is "$$$$ :(", and his second reaction is "Well, I guess that's the end of my sex life". Our child was planned, and we still go back and forth if we should have waited a bit longer and saved more money.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
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  • imageRockyTopVols:

    Everybody is different.

    My wife was not excited at first at all (ours was unplanned). I got over the initial shock after about 6 minutes and have been excited ever since.

    Just give him some time. :)

    Hey, our's was unplanned too.  I guess we weren't the only people throwing caution to the wind back in April :P  

    My wife's reaction was "Oh *** oh *** oh ***!"

    My reaction was "Wait, what?  You sure?"  Then I acted all proud of myself, like "Yeah, I'm continuing the species!  I am a virile man!" As if, you know, billions of other people hadn't done the same thing.  Then my wife made fun of me for a solid month.

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  • All 3 of our pregnancies were very much planned, so I can't speak to reaction to unplanned pregnancies.  Whether or not you were actively trying to prevent may also play into his reaction.  If you were on the pill, or he was using protection, it may be the shock, since you don't think it'll fail (obviously they do from time to time).  Give it time, let him process.
  • imageWillicus:
    imageRockyTopVols:

    Everybody is different.

    My wife was not excited at first at all (ours was unplanned). I got over the initial shock after about 6 minutes and have been excited ever since.

    Just give him some time. :)

    Hey, our's was unplanned too.  I guess we weren't the only people throwing caution to the wind back in April :P  

    My wife's reaction was "Oh *** oh *** oh ***!"

    My reaction was "Wait, what?  You sure?"  Then I acted all proud of myself, like "Yeah, I'm continuing the species!  I am a virile man!" As if, you know, billions of other people hadn't done the same thing.  Then my wife made fun of me for a solid month.

     

    April was a fun month for us lol.

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  • imageLeslieH07:
    I told my bf I was pregnant yesterday and it was not planned. We've been together for 4 years and he has a 8 year old son. This will be our first child together. I was excited and he wasnt so excited. Is this normal for men and unplanned pregnancies? Should I be worried? 

    There is hardly enough here to come to a conclusion one way or another.  Like many have asked, were you two using protection?  Was it just care to the wind, what happens happens?

    The majority of us here planned having kids, so when it finally happened we were very, very happy. For me, it is hard to imagine any other reaction but joy, but again, I am married and it was planned.

    Plus, he already has an 8 year old son that he would be paying support on, right?

    image

  • imageladyjenna13:

    he already has an 8 year old son that he would be paying support on, right?

    That probably is playing a role in this. Just sayin.

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