Jillianmb

smithpaint · September 2012

Hi! I saw you had posted on here that you are adopting a 2yo from Russia. My husband and I had been thinking of adopting. The agency I talked to thought that Russia would be possibly the best for us. Then I was looking more into it, and the cost blew me away. I was hoping to be in the 20-30,000 range. The prices she gave us were 50,000+. Also I read that a lot of Russian children needing adoption suffer from Fetal alcohol syndrome. I just wondered if you could share some of your story with me (when you get the chance) and what you have dealt with adopting from Russia. Thanks so much.

smithpaint · September 2012

I just saw that you have a blog. It looks very helpful! If you have anything you'd like to let me know though that would be great. Good luck on your trip to get your son!

jillianmb · September 2012

Hi there! That's great that you are looking into adopting from Russia! Our adoption will be about $35,000. I am not sure why our agency is so much more affordable b/c I too have read that $50,000 is about average for a Russian adoption. I can PM you our agency if you like.

As far as FAS, that was a big concern for me too. In my research I actually read that it is a misnomer that many children suffer from it. Certainly, FAS is present in Russian children, since knowledge about the dangers of drinking while PG are not well known in Russia, but there are many, many healthy children who are adopted from Russia as well. Ultimately my DH and I decided that we weren't going to worry about FAS and we will deal with it if our son has it. He does not have any of the physical markers that we could see and is developing at a good pace, so that really put our minds at ease. Once you start thinking about the child you want to adopt as "your child" you will do anything for them, no matter what health issues they have.

You can, however, have your child's medical information reviewed by an international adoption doctor and they will most likely be able to spot any FAS markers. If the child you are referred to does have FAS markers you can decline the referral and you will get a referral for another child. You will never be forced to adopt a child with health issues that you are not prepared to accept. With the new legislation that just passed in Russia, you will be given as much information as the orphanage has available about the child's health and social history. So while there are no 100% guarantees that your child will be healthy (as there are no guarantees with a biological child) you should be able to make a well informed decision.

My experience in the Russian adoption world is that the vast majority of children absolutely thrive when they come home. Parenting an adopted child is never exactly the same as parenting a biological child, but going through the home study process and education process will equip you to face any issues that will arise. The home study process can be scary b/c you will learn about every.possible.thing under the sun that could go "wrong" for an adopted child, but just remember that it is HIGHLY unlikely that your child will deal with all of those issues. Even if they deal with one or two, you will take it day by day and the love you have for your child will carry you forward.

Let me know if you have any more questions!

Jillianmb

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