Seperating
Saturday H gave his last ditch speech about love and wanting what we once had back.
Sunday H gave me his speech about how he's not happy either and if I don't want this marriage, cut him loose. While I didn't commit to anything (because I need to get thru a couple more weeks for the bankruptcy court date) we talked about the possibility of dividing things and visitation.
Today he asked me if I made up my mind yet.
He's going to press me. I'm trying to buy time, but I may just have to tell him I want a divorce.
I love how he's putting it on me. This is classic H. Maybe I should just keep putting him off and force his hand and make him say it. For ONCE in his life I would like the man to stand up, make a flipping decision that HE can stand behind and not put off on someone else.
And you know what else just burns me?? Sunday he was saying how embarrassing this all was. How WE lied to his family. Excuse me? I didn't hand them the big glorious bullsh*t story about what a wonderful flippin' life we have. Maybe YOU need to learn to shut your mouth. Even if we did have a fantastic marriage and life, no one really cares to hear it.
It also upsets me that he has almost little or not concern about the bankruptcy. That's the LEAST of his worries. He basically wants to know if I am capable of turning on a switch and being the loving, adoring, bend over backwards for you and every deadbeat in your life wife agan.
Meanwhile I am focussed on my career and meeting the demand of my work, the bankruptcy, the foreclosure, finishing our taxes, and possibly seperating from my husband. Can I please have one more thing thrown at me?? Because I don't know if my life can get anymore crappier or stressful.
So yeah. I'm an emotional wreck this week.
No advice. Just venting a little. And I guess looking forward to the possibility of H being out of this house soon and one less person I need to baby.
He says I'll miss him when I'm gone. I can't help but smile because I know different. I won't. One less irresponsible person in my life will make me incredibly happy.
Re: Seperating
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"Karma1969: If baking someone a birthday pie/cake is romantic, I must be a slut."
hugs!
At least after his speech he won't be able to pretend he is "shocked" about your decision to divorce.
Hang in there.
I would be slightly honest and reply "Its not so easy when you have done X,Y and Z to me over and over again. If you really want it to work out, why havent you done 1,2 or 3 (make those specifics that need to be done with the bankruptcy).
You can still leave him if he DOES 1, 2 or 3 (hey, it turns out it WASNT enough or too little too late), but at least he does something.
Agree, esp with the bolded. If he wants a decision made right now then he needs to make it and move out. T&P are with you.