Anybody go med-free and then hesitate to do it again?

jinnymb · September 2012

I absolutely wanted a med-free birth experience for DS1. I realized this late in the game and didn't get into the Bradley Classes or Med-Free Birthing Coaching. I did take the regular hospital classes and read all the recommended books. I ended up with an epi and a little pitocin, which was annoying but still a good birth experience.

With DS2 I rocked it med-free (much faster birth though). I was so glad I did it and nursing was so much easier etc.. My recovery much better as well. The OB I got that night was very supportive.

However, I never took Bradley Classes or offically prepared. I was obviously in a lot of pain and don't feel I really managed it more than I "just took it" if that makes sense? I screamed a lot and bit DH a couple of times. It was kind of ridiculous.

DH has been an amazing birth coach and totally supportive of med-free birthing. But, we are both a little concerned about attempting med-free again without formal training. I can't swing the Bradley Classes time wise and justify putting out the extra money for that or a doula.

I am starting to really doubt that I will be able to do it again. Any advice or encouragement??

tokenhoser · September 2012

My doula was a really important part of my good experience. If I didn't have the money, I'd do my best to find one training and thus free or cheap.

My husband isn't an expert and he hates seeing me in pain. I am well educated, but I can't help myself when I'm in pain. That's why, for me, a third calm, smart, helpful person is KEY. I doubt I'd do med-free if it was just DH and me in a hospital.

Celyn · September 2012

Is Bradley the only natural birth prep class available to you? There are lots of other methods and several home study type courses.

jinnymb · September 2012

Thank you for the info on a Doula in training. I didn't realize that was an option.

I've only ever heard of Bradley Classes, that is what my other friends who went med-free did. I know there is hypnobabies too, but wasn't really sure what that was. I didn't know you could do a homestudy. Which do you recommend?

Celyn · September 2012

Everyone is different. People who are introspective or meditate easily often have success with hypnobabies (which has a homestudy course) or sort of the opposite of hypno, which is mindfulness. I did a meditation with Nancy Bardacke, the author of Mindful Birthing, two days ago. She's got a fantastic workshop and I've had clients who really love it. For someone who took on the pain and just stayed in the moment, that might be a program that appeals to you. You could learn it from the book, I think. Also something that might work for you is Birthing from Within. There are courses, but also a book.

Celyn · September 2012

In Philly, I'd suggest contacting Beth Goldberg and seeing if she has any recent students looking for low fee clients. Her number is (215) 906-5384

jinnymb · September 2012

Thanks!!

Hyaline · September 2012

I just wanted to say--I don't think you "fail" at natural birth because you yell or say something you wouldn't have said under normal circumstances. Even fully prepared, many women don't have a zen-like natural birth experience--they're in pain, they vocalize, they feel at some points like they can't do it. But they do--and it's ok that they doubted themselves for a little bit or yelled at their SO or whatever.

Not that preparing can't be awesome--pps had great suggestions Just wanted to say to be careful about getting an idealized image of prepared natural birth or "good" or "successful" natural birth

cwm11985 · September 2012

This is something I have though about A LOT! I didn't do much preparation for my LO's birth, I just read Ina May and just did what I had to do in the hospital to get through the pain (including screaming and biting like pp). However, the more I think about it the more I wonder if I can do that again. I think next time around I will look into getting a doula as well. I don't think I'm the hynobabies type and I really have no interest in Bradley classes after looking into that. Anyways, good luck!!

mb314 · September 2012

Hyaline:
I just wanted to say--I don't think you "fail" at natural birth because you yell or say something you wouldn't have said under normal circumstances. Even fully prepared, many women don't have a zen-like natural birth experience--they're in pain, they vocalize, they feel at some points like they can't do it. But they do--and it's ok that they doubted themselves for a little bit or yelled at their SO or whatever.
Not that preparing can't be awesome--pps had great suggestions Just wanted to say to be careful about getting an idealized image of prepared natural birth or "good" or "successful" natural birth

DH and I joke that our LO was born hearing a slew of horrible curse words coming from me! I don't do zen pain management. I like to vocalize. Everyone is different. After birth I immediate apologized to DH and my midwife and the nurses for being a *** to them! But I went med free.

Anyway, I prepared using Bradley. For us, Bradley was most useful in terms of understanding a natural course of birth and all the "standard" and common interventions that hospitals can push and understanding when we should deny or accept an intervention. In the end, I didn't use any of the Bradley positions or relaxation techniques because I just followed what felt right.

I think if you read the Bradley books, some Ina May books, and as much stuff as you can, you don't necessarily need a class.

Mrs E in Oregon · September 2012

I have no interest in going to bradley classes or listening to hypnobabies. I think the most helpful things for me so far ar watching various homebith/birthing center dvds. Watching other women go through birth is what prepared women for centuries, we have gone away from that as a society. Rent from Netflix, the library, or go on youtube maybe and find birthing videos to watch. Though everyone should watch a c-section at some point to prepare themselves for that "what-if," the best ones to watch are the ones that are about less interventions to see women finding their own way to birth.

Movies I suggest - Orgasmic Birth, With Women, any of the The Business of Being Born series. In More Business of Being Born there is one hr video with celebs talking about their home births and that one is really interesting to hear people you already kind of know retelling their story. No births to watch there but better than hearing all of your friends horror stories 5 times.

FWIW, screaming may not be fun, but opening your mouth helps open your cervix. Or other sphynters, try it during a big poo some time. A little screaming during birth can be forgiven too.

tlew12778 · September 2012

I went med-free (not by choice... I had a precipitous labor) and if I were to have another, I would not choose to go med-free. I was in so much pain I was barely coherent during labor. I have no idea who delivered my baby or who was in the room bc I couldn't catch my breath or keep my eyes open (that was the only way I could deal with the pain). I took an autogenesis class (more popular here in Europe than hypno or Bradley) and frankly, I didn't have the time to implement any of the techniques.

That said, I did read Ina May before giving birth. I considered trying med-free or at least going as far as possible med-free but once I was in the the situation, I was begging for pain relief. I think that had I had the chance to breathe and just gather my wits about me between contractions, I could have accepted a natural birth more easily.

Joyfullnoise · September 2012

Celyn:
Is Bradley the only natural birth prep class available to you? There are lots of other methods and several home study type courses.

This! Dh and I took a yoga for labor class together that was like 3 hours long and $90 and it was more valuable for me than the longer, more formal classes.

Are there any options like this where you are?

jinnymb · September 2012

Thank you for all your suggestions!! I will look into other class options, videos, re-read the books, and possible assistance.

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Anybody go med-free and then hesitate to do it again?

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