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Babies: 9 - 12 Months
futureshaw
member
First birthday drama - opinions
futureshaw
member
For the past few weeks I have been actively planning my daughters first birthday however was having difficulty nailing down the guest list. With immediate family only our number was at 31. Our house could definitely not accommodate 31 people - so we were torn on what to do....not have a party at all? Cut out some of our family and risk them getting upset they werent included in her day? Well at the same time I was planning my daughters bday party, my sister-in-law was planning my niece's 4th birthday party which is November 18 (my daughers is October 13). This past tuesday my sister-in-law found a small room at a local hall that was extremely affordable and could accommodate up to 50 people - she booked it for November. I joked with my mom and husband that if I booked that hall all my problems would be solved as we could have all our family plus a few of my daughters "friends" come. My husband said it sounded good and encouraged me to go and have a look at it. That same day I went to view the room - it was very plain but the perfect size and best of all - all the pre and post party cleaning was included! I booked the room on the spot. Well the next day I found out that my brother and and sister-in-law were disappointed with me that I did not ask for their permission to book that room since they had booked it first for my niece's party. They said I was disrespectful and inconsiderate and that I "took the wind out of their sails". Well I immediately cancelled the room and had to completely change plans 3 weeks before my daughters first birthday. I then emailed my brother to let him know that I didnt intend to upset anyone and that there was "no hard feelings". However they still continue to be upset with me as this whole thing has gotten out of hand. Finally my question to you ladies - Should I have asked for their permission before booking the room? Was I disrespectful? It's driving me crazy and has caused a huge riff in my family. Thanks and sorry for the long post!
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Re: First birthday drama - opinions
They are being a bunch of babies. It is a room, its not like you stold the theme and the day they wanted.
My sisters and I have rented the same room for all of our wedding and baby showers, my DD's b-day and my neices b-day. No biggie.
my read shelf:
Aside from the fact that they didn't double book since the parties are in separate months it's an empty room. A blank canvas. I find it a bit high-schoolish for someone to stamp their feet around crying about another relative using the same hall for their party. It's not like they're both having it at Bounce-A-Rama, which would then be almost the exact same party (and still lame to be upset, IMO.) It's a frickin' hall. Each family can decorate it for their parties as different as they want it to be. This is just as lame as those posts about someone's friend having the same wedding colors as theirs did. They don't own the patent or license to have only their party there!
OP, I don't think you should've cancelled your reservation. You just basically rewarded their infantile behavior and gave them permission to control you. Now you will NEVER be able to throw your child's party at any location that they've chosen because they saw it first, wah wah wah.
If it was me and they were still upset about it I would reschedule it for the same place. Especially since they are still upset over it. How childish of them.
All of this, I would have kept the reservation, its just a room. I can see being upset if you stole their theme but what's the big deal, its just a room!!
BFP #2 March 2011, Baby Girl born November 2011!!!
I feel like we have the same family members!
Some of mine are crazy weird uptight about dumb stuff like what you are describing. I don't know why people spend their lives being so miserable and making issues where there are none.
I'm sorry that you are dealing with that, and I think they sound ridiculous to be upset over something like that. I am glad, however, that other people have crazy family members and I'm not the only one. I say that with a lot of humor.
First off their reaction is ridiculous, rude and entitled! I would have told them to shove it as it isn't there property, and they have no say in where you have your daughter's party!
I think you should go back and see if the place is still available and they'll get over it.
I'm having a very similar problem, I really want to have DD's party at our home. We have a really nice apartment and it's roomy... just not roomy enough for 36 people... and that's just family that I want there... not including the 10-12 more who will be pissed if they aren't invited. So I'm sending invites out to only the most important family members and friends and an informal word-of-mouth invite too the others and we're still having it at our home. What I'm going to do is have an open 4 hours and people can come and go as they please, arrive whenever, leave whenever. I'm hoping that will alleviate the packed house problem a bit.