How do you know Preschool isn't working?

carmenlarue · September 2012

DD has been in PS since Sept 4th, She seems to like it and hasn't had a crying fit when DH drops her off in the mornings. At night she wakes up with nightmares and complains of stomach aches and tells me no preschool. In the mornings before we leave, it's a battle to get her up and out, but by he time she gets to school she's ok. We have a doctors appt on Wed to check out stomach issues, she can't explain her nightmares to me, but is VERY upset at night. Im just not sure how to handle her at night with sometimes 2 wakings of sheer screaming. Could it be Preschool? Its all day from 8-3:00, Any advice would help ladies. thanks!

mrsseguin · September 2012

Has this been happening since the first day? DS was having a hard time going to daycare after a while, come to find out another little boy was hitting him. Once I found that out and took care of it (and DC was already working on the issue) things were fine. If it's been happening since the first day, I'd say to stick it out. Maybe the routine change is a lot in the beginning, maybe she's having a bit harder time adjusting. Hopefully it will get better.

the_jackpot · September 2012

Ugh, sorry that you are going through this My ds was/is having a hard time adjusting. He is at a new school and has never had issues before. I was SO ready to pull him. Dropping him off was a nightmare, tears and clinging. It was awful. And this week it is just better. He is not skipping off but he is not saying he is afraid we aren't coming back etc.

So...I say stick it out. It has only been 2 weeks. It takes a log time to make friends and feel comfy. Keep reassuring her that it is ok. Talk to her in the am about what she wants to do that day etc. Give her a few more weeks. There are a lot of things that could be stressing her so try to make her as assured as possible. Good luck!

neverblushed · September 2012

Ugh -- I feel your pain. I had one kid who started preschool at 3 and was absolutely fine. No tears, no drama, she just took it in stride, even though she had JUST turned 3 and was a shy little girl.

My youngest had a much harder time, even though he was socially more adept than big sis. Crying, stressing out about it, begging not to have to go, sleep disruptions, you name it. About the only thing we didn't deal with was potty regression, but that's because he hadn't actually started using the potty when school started, and I was sneaking him into school in a pull up!

Anyway, I considered pulling him and waiting a while, but I kept in communication with the teachers, and they kept saying "let's wait and see how it goes." It took half the school year, but he gradually became more relaxed and more confident.

In the meantime, I worked with him at home by "playing school" with him and his stuffed animals and toys. Also, we tried to stay focused on a favorite toy or book at school. He really liked one particular fishing toy at the school. We would often talk about how fun it would be to see the fishing toy again. I used that to help bridge the gap.

Additionally, if your child is 3-ish, know that this is a big time for anxiety and sleep disruptions anyway, whether or not the child is starting school.

jlw2505 · September 2012

She has only been in school for 2 weeks - it is a huge change and it can take a few weeks for her to really adjust. She could also be having night terrors or be constipated. Is she pooping regularly? Is she eating well, even at school? Is she drinking enough water throughout the day? It could be a lot of different things. I would give school more time - maybe start more of a routine around school if you don't have one to make things easier for her - the night before, pick out her clothes, get her bag ready. If she brings lunch or snacks, keep her involved in getting that ready. Can she bring a picture of you to keep with her or some other small item to hold for comfort. Have your morning routine be the same every single day so she knows what to expect.

Angela814 · September 2012

How old is she? I agree with the others who said it's a huge adjustment, especially if she hasn't been in any structured programs before. 8-3 is a long day too. That's essentially our public school day here (8:35-3:25) starting in kindergarten. 4K is half days.

Does she get to nap at preschool? Did she nap before that? Being overtired can cause night wakings. I think kids tend to get stomach aches when they're nervous or anxious about something.

I'd also talk to the teacher and see if there might be something bothering her at school.

anonsouthernbell · September 2012

If this behavior started w. the beg of her preschool then I would immediately stop sending her.

outnumbered · September 2012

How old is your daughter? Did your daughter go to daycare before attending preschool? If she did not, this long of a day is a huge adjustment. Give her time to get used to school. If she is having a hard time getting up in the morning she needs to go to bed earlier. School is tiring for kids.

My 6 year old son sleepwalks, talks, and has bad dreams. It started when he was about 3. They are more frequent when he is growing or under stress. The stress of starting school can cause unsettled sleep, but it does not mean she does not like school.

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How do you know Preschool isn't working?

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