can I do this again
I hope this is the right place for me, from some of the previous posts I read it seems that we are in similiar places. It took 2 years to get pregnant with my first and only child, he is truly a blessing that I am even more greatful for. It was a long road and so emotionally crippling. I am not sure anyone who hasn't work so hard to have a child really understands what it does to you. How month after month you spent hundreds on pregnancy tests just to see it is negative. You visit doctor after doctor who all tell you different yet similiar things. They all want to try something new but you have to go through the same bull every time. The painful ultrasounds, all the bloodwork, the expensive tests. Then the medicine. Try this or that. All your friends and family who have been successful giving you all their little tricks and tips, swearing by them (which you have tried but thanks anyway). The crying, the hate, the annoyance. It is so hard to pretend you don't want to snap somebody's neck because they ask you every 5 mins when you and your husband are going to have a baby!
I am not even sure my husband truly gets emotional toll it takes on me. It was hard, and I have put off even trying to get pregnant again because I don't think I am ready for all that all over. Everyone says it is easier now that it has happened before but my body is being even weirder than before. My doctor informed me that I need to decide quick and do it soon because a hysterectomy is coming soon. I went to a different doctor and his diagnosis was the same. I have my basket of meds to start again and crossing my fingers, trying to have faith. My sister is pregnant and she has no sympathy so it has been a rough road already mixed with anger, jealousy, and hurt. It is her third child, each child was planned and concieved after 1 attempt. Not sure how this is fair, lol, I know life isn't fair but it should be! I am wondering if there is something any of you do that helps you get through each month, emotionally and that antsy jitteryness of waiting.
Re: can I do this again
I would say that the overwhelming nature of this board is the biitchiness. We are amazingly supportive, but all have a different level of bitterness. While I am sympathetic to most (if not all) people struggling with infertility, I don't even have a first child, even after three IVF's so I am am more bitter than most.
Not sure if you will fit in, only lurking will tell you that, but a thick skin, and snide sense of humor and a love for bacon and Pandas will help.
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Nothing breeds faster than Crazy