Update about school post

christy2125 · September 2012

Okay so now I'm really pissed. I called up to the school; the central office, everywhere today. Nobody will talk to me about this school records issue. DH called up there today. Same thing. They will only speak to BM or her DH about the issue; they won't even tell us whats going on about anything.

So now BM has to go up there to try to resolve the issue that has nothing to do with her all because they are refusing MH his legal right to have access to his child's information. Thank goodness she is willing to do this for us.

I personally live the part where they told me not to call BM that they would call BM, no I'm sorry but I will be calling her to give her a heads up on all this crazyness." sorry for the rant I'm just do pissed off.

SQuaid · September 2012

That is so ridiculous. I can't imagine you are the first person with this issue. They need to get it together!

xmaryrickx · September 2012

Do you live far from the school? Does he have a written court order stating he has 5050 custody? If so, he really should have his lawyer step in at this point and inform them they have to comply as he is her legal guardian one of them. BM should not be involved unless she created this mess.

Hopeforthebest · September 2012

The fact that the school is putting up this much of an obstacle really makes me think your DH should make an appearance in person with CO in hand.

If they still argue, lawyer time.

christy2125 · September 2012

xmaryrickx:
Do you live far from the school? Does he have a written court order stating he has 5050 custody? If so, he really should have his lawyer step in at this point and inform them they have to comply as he is her legal guardian one of them. BM should not be involved unless she created this mess.

We don't live far from the school but we don't have 50/50 custody either. We do have legal access to her grades though. The only reason we are asking BM to talk to the school is because at this point that is all they will to talk to and we can't afford a lawyer at all. If BM can't get any headway with them by the end of the week then we will have to figure out how to pay for an attny but then that will take a while saving up enough money for an attny we have nothing of value to sell

lvnlife3184 · September 2012

Have you or DH spoke with a high up enough person yet? This sounds like a terrible mess and like something just isn't right.

Schools and offices usually won't speak much to stepparents. I'm a SM myself and DH handles all of these issues with my help honestly. I do all the background work and just hand him forms and say "turn these in" or "call this person and tell/ask them this..."

Does the school district hold meetings monthly? I know ours does and people can attend these and raise issues in front of the board. I would try these ideas before saving up for a lawyer cause that can be so costly for something that shouldn't have to reach that point.

Glad to hear you guys have a relationship with BM like you do, that she's willing to help.

christy2125 · September 2012

lvnlife3184:
Have you or DH spoke with a high up enough person yet? This sounds like a terrible mess and like something just isn't right.
Schools and offices usually won't speak much to stepparents. I'm a SM myself and DH handles all of these issues with my help honestly. I do all the background work and just hand him forms and say "turn these in" or "call this person and tell/ask them this..."
Does the school district hold meetings monthly? I know ours does and people can attend these and raise issues in front of the board. I would try these ideas before saving up for a lawyer cause that can be so costly for something that shouldn't have to reach that point.
Glad to hear you guys have a relationship with BM like you do, that she's willing to help.

Yes we've gone all the way up to the superintendents office, I'm not surprised they don't want to talk to me either I guess what annoys me is that when MH calls they won't speak to him either.

The next meeting is next month, we are planning to go to that, not only because of this whole issue but because of the issue with MH not being on any of the records anymore; somehow they magically lost my husbands info and put all of my SD's SF's info in MH place which we feel should of never happened.

I'm just so pissed because it's not like they can't sit and say we are the first blended family they have ever run across and yet the entire disctrict is now acting like they have no idea how to handle this situation and that MH is this evil father just because he and BM are not married.... It's just insane.

fellesferie · September 2012

I might try sending them a very official/strongly worded letter via certified mail. Inform them that they are violating YH's rights (and likely the rights of many other parents), and that you fully intend to discuss it at the next school board meeting.

You could also try going to local papers/news stations.

twister22 · September 2012

I am flabbergasted at this BS. Since you don't have the money for an attorney, I would send a letter via certified mail stating that the district is violating YH rights, and if this is not resolved within 48 hours you will be suing. They obviously don't care, and it sounds like they need scared straight. Maybe I'm just being hormonal from pregnancy

. Also, I agree with PP's about strength in numbers.

emikat · September 2012

fellesferie:
I might try sending them a very official/strongly worded letter via certified mail. Inform them that they are violating YH's rights (and likely the rights of many other parents), and that you fully intend to discuss it at the next school board meeting.
You could also try going to local papers/news stations.

Absolutely this. I would still threaten to bring a lawyer into this even if you are bluffing. And I was going to suggest getting the local papers/news stations in on this. I'm sure the would love a good story and the school would perk up with that kind of bad publicity.

Ilumine · September 2012

Time to call your State Department of Education.

christy2125 · September 2012

Thank you all, we will definitely be using these suggestions. Hopefully we will be able to get something figured out here soon.

christy2125 · September 2012

MelRC117:
Do you guys know any other divorced parents in the same district? What do they do? Strength in numbers!! Seems very unlikely you guys are the only ones dealing with BS.[/quote

We don't live in the same district as BM so I don't know, most of SD's friends are in a Necular family though do I really don't know; that would be something that we'd have to research

christy2125 · September 2012

MelRC117:
Do you guys know any other divorced parents in the same district? What do they do? Strength in numbers!! Seems very unlikely you guys are the only ones dealing with BS.[/quote

We don't live in the same district as BM so I don't know, most of SD's friends have both parents at home though so I really don't know; that would be something that we'd have to research

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