STM's- Keeping child #1 in daycare during ML

sweetsunnyc · September 2012

I am considering pulling my 4 year old DD out of daycare and keeping her at home with me while I am on maternity leave. Just a quick background- her daycare is 45 min away from home, closer to my job. As I will not be commuting, I would like to avoid that drive. She is also with her father, my ex husband, two days a week, so there would be days that would be just me and baby. I am also planning in putting her in a pre-k program closer to home after maternity, so I'm not terribly worried about losing my spot at this one.

Is anyone else considering keeping their older child home while on leave? Just wanted some thoughts....

sunrae719 · September 2012

DS stayed in DC full-time during my leave, but he was not quite 2 and super high energy and DD had a lot of issues as a newborn and DH could pick up and drop off.

In your situation, I probably would keep her home. That commute would be tough with a newborn. I might consider moving her to the new program earlier, but weigh that with all the change and how she's adjusting.

BeebopandBuddy · September 2012

It sounds like you have some good reasons to pull her out.

DD is staying in 3 days a week. She is so young and I think it would confuse her and upset her to take her out for an extended period and then put her back in. Also, I don't want to lose her spot and I definitely don't want to have no one-on-one time with the new baby.

However, if I were in your situation, which is very different, I think I would take her out.

emberlee3 · September 2012

I would keep her home. DS stayed in daycare, but it was closer to our house, and DH did most of the chauffeuring.

bearkatjen · September 2012

I think you have some very practical reasons for keeping your DD home during that time, but to answer your question, no, we are absolutely not considering keeping DS1 home.
Daycare is close, plus it's on DH's way to work. I want peace and quiet, and to have full flexibility for DS2 during the day.

monica92603 · September 2012

DD was doing 3 full days and we cut her down to 3 part time days. My situation is completely different though. Daycare is only a 5 minute drive so it is a super easy drop off and pick up. Plus, I don't want to lose our spot for when I go back to work in January. I wanted to keep her routine similar and she loves her school friends and teachers. It almost felt like it would be a punishment to take her out and I wanted her to have some extra attention. So far, it's working well.

megann831 · September 2012

I'm keeping DD home. DD went to a SAHM and when I go back to work she'll be going to daycare, so I also wasn't worried about keeping a spot or keeping a routine. I also have been home from May and return in Nov, so I enjoy the opportunity to be a SAHM for a while with both of my LOs. I love having the two of them together and how much DD loves being with DS.

sweetsunnyc · September 2012

Thank you for all of the helpful replies- I am leaning heavily towards keeping her home and maybe just asking family members to help out and maybe take her for a few hours once or twice a week.

jf198400 · September 2012

I kept my DD home on my 2nd ML, she was 18months at the time. It was great! We did a lot of fun things, it was much more entertaining than being alone at home with a newborn. Considering you'd save money, don't need to hold your spot, would still have alone time with baby, and wouldn't have to drive 3hrs a day back and forth, you should ABSOLUTELY keep your DD home.

pitterpatter129 · September 2012

Since you have an older child, it would probably be fine. Or you could find something a little closer to home if it doesn't work out well. I'm planning on leaving DS in daycare when baby comes. I'm taking off 12 weeks, but he's so little and into everything, I think he would do better staying in the structured school environment since there will be big changes at home. No need to completely upheave his entire world.

iverske9 · September 2012

I would maybe look into a program closer to home, and keep the option open if you have a really tough night or days with the newborn. I would like the option to have older child go somewhere so I could nap while little one does.

mrskelly731 · September 2012

I would say stay home with you, especially since you are not needing to secure her spot. That is a long drive to make twice a day for a few days a week.

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