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Attachment Parenting
CJJ1016
member
Bedsharing is not working for us anymore.
CJJ1016
member
At 2 mo. I picked up a rock and play and that solved the sleeping problems we'd been having to that point. She would nurse to sleep at night, go down around 9 or 9:30 and sleep till 5 or 6 at which point I'd pull her into bed with me and she'd nurse/sleep until 8 or so. (It was wonderful!)
She has now outgrown the rock and play and despite my attempts to get her into a play pen for the first part of the night, she is 100% bedsharing. I wasn't totally against this, even though it means I get terrible sleep if any, until she fell out of bed. Twice.
I know, I know, flame me if you must. I feel horrible about it and it has motivated me to change, but I don't know how to do this. Most nights I can nurse her to sleep and lay her down in the play pen around 8:30-9:30, and she would sleep a few hours at least, but then I can't lay her back down. Now she hardly sleeps in the play pen at all before waking up (screaming). The other night she woke up at 12:30 and for the next hour she woke up immediately every time I tried to lay her down.
She naps in my arms, or on the breast and I know that she does these things because that's how she knows to sleep. It's just not working anymore. I can't get anything done during the day and I'm hardly sleeping at night. I'm currently staying at my parents home in Canada, DH is at home so I can't ask him for help.
Any advice? I desperately need a change!
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Re: Bedsharing is not working for us anymore.
Will she nap in a carrier? I can get DS to fall asleep in the mei tai and once he is really out I can often put him in the crib without waking up. If not, he will at least go back to sleep in the carrier and I can have free hands. He is tough with naps right now; I think it has a lot to do with the age.
At night, we are trying to move him to his crib because he is a crazy floppy guy all night long and bedsharing is fairly miserable. We have some success now and then and a lot of failure, so he is still in our bed more often than not. I would suggest some bed rails for the falling out of bed issue, or you could try putting her on a mattress on the floor and nursing her to sleep there and then getting up.
Can one of your parents help you out at night? I could never get my kids to go back to sleep in the crib during the middle of the night, either, until they were a lot bigger.
Have you tried a floor bed? You can nurse her, pop her off, and sneak out. We have our mattress on the floor for that reason alone!
Hang in there. Baby sleep sucks.
DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)
How long are you at your parents? Could you get a bed-rail? I know it doesn't solve the issue of LO sleeping in their own space, but might help you get through the next little while until DH can help out?
A floor bed is also another good idea.
Are you familiar with baby whisperer's shush pat and pick up/put down? Essentially you pat baby on your shoulder until drowsy. Then you put them in their cot and keep patting and shushing until they go to sleep. If they start to wail you pick them up and soothe them and then as soon as they're calm again you put them back down, rinse and repeat.
It can take a while, but I like it as you don't leave baby to cry on their own.
With DD2 I would have to really snug her into the mattress so that she could feel me near, and basically lean right into the cot so that I was right next to her.
Elizabeth 5yrs old Jane 3yrs old
Thanks for the suggestions ladies! A floor bed is not a bad idea, I may give it a try if this doesn't get better.
Funny you should mention this as I just read this book today! For two naps today I did try her method and it works, just takes a while. So I'm going to continue on trying that. A few days (weeks?) of really rough sleep will be worth it if it leads to success!
Would you mind sharing which bedrails you found that fold under the mattress when not in use? I've been looking around for some but they are all so big and cumbersome.
:::Lurker chiming in:::
Instead of bed rails, you can use pool noodles. Just tuck them under the fitted sheet. Or even rolled up towels or pillows. As long as they are snug under the fitted sheet, she shouldn't be able to roll out of the bed. Plus, it's a lot cheaper than bed rails.