Dads & Dads-to-be

Adding a new foster child next week

I took the call yesterday from our local CPS home finder for a 10 month old boy who needs a different foster home. We are set to pick him up next week. He's is healthy and doing well there are just too many little ones in the current home. We are pretty excited to say the least. This will be the first baby in our home full-time and will put us at 3 kids. We have a 12yr old girl, her 6 her old sister and will have this boy by Wednesday (if not before) of next week plus we have one on the way with our surrogate. 

We posted on FB that we are taking this boy. For the most part everyone was really happy and excited for us, but then we get the comments about how crazy we are to take that many kids in. I'm surprised by this for a few reasons, but mostly bc 3 kids really isn't more than the normal for families. Whatev though.

I can't wait to hear the comments after we announce in a few weeks that we are pregnant with one especially after adding this baby! We don't know yet what the plan is, but as always, we'd love to adopt. 

 Chris 

***Loss and success mentioned***
Me:34, Wife: 32
IF reasoning = MFI: Zero Sperm Count using FairFax donor bank
IUI #1 - #3: 2011 = BFN
IVF: 2011 = BFN, lost all 10 embryos (with C/Ps)
Jan 2014 - OBGYN (not RE) found and removed wife's "field of" uterine polyps after failed IVF

Moving on to surrogacy (actually a planned adoption)
Surrogate IUI#1: 7.17.12 = BFP!! 15dpiui = 256, 17dpiui = 346
Oliver Zane born - 3/29/2013 on Good Friday!

IUI #4 - #6: 2014-2015 = BFN (with C/Ps)
Switch sperm donors, start ketosis diet to reduce inflammation late 2015
IVF 2: Jan and Feb 2016, 3 great looking, 8 cell 3 day embryos. Two ET, one frozen
2.18.2016 (8dp3dt) = BFFP!
2.22.2016 (12dp3dt) = 649!!

Started foster care experience in 2012. Now waiting to adopt our foster daughter, 7, who has lived with us for 3 years. 


"Wait for your God, and don't give up on Him - ever!" Hosea 12:6 (msg)

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Re: Adding a new foster child next week

  • This is awesome! Congrats!

    Some of my friends are foster children and for some it took a long time to find a good home, it sounds like these kids will be blessed to have you, and what an honour you have to parent these kids!  All the best!! 

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Congrats!!

    I'm going to put my ignorance on display and ask how does the foster system work?  Will you be caring for these kids indefinitely (as long as the situation is good for all involved)?  One of my wife's coworkers took in a newborn about 4 months ago, but it was a conditional situation where the mother could take the child back at anytime.  I feel like that would be very hard.


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  • Congratulations!!! I think fostering is awesome, and that you and YW are super brave and badass to be doing so.

    "We like nothing better than buffing our Zygoma. And imagining a horny time traveling long overcoat purple scarf wearing super sleuth nordic legend fuck fantasy. Get to work on that, internet." Benedict Cumberbatch

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     GIFSoup 

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  • Thanks everyone! We are thrilled to have a baby in the home! My wife would like a good "practice" baby before our little gets here. We have no idea how long he will be with us. 

    Prime: Child Protective Services takes kids out of their homes for many different reason...safety, abuse, neglect, drugs, etc. These kids move in to temp homes with foster parents who have had background checks, fingerprinting, reference checks, interviews, their home inspected for safety and some training (although that's lacking!). The State "pays me back" for the money I spend to take care of the kids plus takes care of all childcare (not in all states) and Medical/Dental. We also get an allowance for clothing three times a year. 

    The kids are living with us until the parents either fix their "problems" as defined by the State and the court system or until they can find a relative that passes the background and finger print checks etc. to adopt the kids. If that doesn't happen, the State will move to take the kids permanently from the parents and they will go up for adoption. Foster parents fall behind relatives (as long as they pass the above) for the chance to adopt, but most foster parents will adopt their kids if they came up. 

    We would love to adopt, but part of the cost would be waiting this all out and loving them anyway. We could end up adopting a perfectly healthy baby for less that $5000 but we have to be willing to go through the chance of losing them. For us, we think that we are helping these kids no matter how long they are with us and we are learning to grow our hearts (and they make for great parenting practice....we can't mess up nearly as much as their own parents did!). Additionally, we feel like having foster kids and adopting at some point is the plan God has for our lives. 

    Chris 

    ***Loss and success mentioned***
    Me:34, Wife: 32
    IF reasoning = MFI: Zero Sperm Count using FairFax donor bank
    IUI #1 - #3: 2011 = BFN
    IVF: 2011 = BFN, lost all 10 embryos (with C/Ps)
    Jan 2014 - OBGYN (not RE) found and removed wife's "field of" uterine polyps after failed IVF

    Moving on to surrogacy (actually a planned adoption)
    Surrogate IUI#1: 7.17.12 = BFP!! 15dpiui = 256, 17dpiui = 346
    Oliver Zane born - 3/29/2013 on Good Friday!

    IUI #4 - #6: 2014-2015 = BFN (with C/Ps)
    Switch sperm donors, start ketosis diet to reduce inflammation late 2015
    IVF 2: Jan and Feb 2016, 3 great looking, 8 cell 3 day embryos. Two ET, one frozen
    2.18.2016 (8dp3dt) = BFFP!
    2.22.2016 (12dp3dt) = 649!!

    Started foster care experience in 2012. Now waiting to adopt our foster daughter, 7, who has lived with us for 3 years. 


    "Wait for your God, and don't give up on Him - ever!" Hosea 12:6 (msg)

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    image
  • That's crazy awesome!

    Congrats!

    Oddly, my wife and I are planning on adopting in the future, we have just always planned on having a blended family. BUT when we tell friends about it they look at us funny. It's totally weird, but it doesn't phase us. I'm super excited to welcome my son home next week and to one day open up our house to more children who deserve a family.

    You're a rockstar! 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • imageDavidStamps:

    That's crazy awesome!

    Congrats!

    Oddly, my wife and I are planning on adopting in the future, we have just always planned on having a blended family. BUT when we tell friends about it they look at us funny. It's totally weird, but it doesn't phase us. I'm super excited to welcome my son home next week and to one day open up our house to more children who deserve a family.

    You're a rockstar! 

    +1!!

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  • I will give the quick overview instead of the dragged out life story.....

    I was given up for adoption by my birth mother when I was just over two years old. My birth father was never in the picture during that time period. She was very young and a lost soul. She had a friend take me to child services instead of doing it herself.

    I was in various foster homes from that point until I was 4 1/2. I remember a few of them, the ones where my foster siblings would beat me up and take my food and such.

    At 4 1/2 I was introduced to a young, hippie-like couple. It was just supposed to be another foster home for that weekend only. It was early summer, and I remember each second of that weekend like it was yesterday. At one point, as I was sitting on the front porch with the woman, I stated, "I am really going to like living here!" The woman ran into the house, crying, and I thought to myself that I messed up once again. I was so used to selling myself, my worth, to anyone I met at that point.

    That same summer, only a month or so later, that woman and man were still in my life. I never left their sight. One day we went to the Milwaukee County Courthouse, which I also remember vividly. We were there for a very short period of time, met with a judge, and that was it.

    I was adopted on a beautiful, sunny day by those two wonderful people. They are my hero's, and my love for them is unconditional. They taught me that, and after all these years I have my own son, who I love and teach to love in the same way they loved and taught me to love.

    I am so happy for you. You will also be a hero in the eyes of the children that you take care of through foster care, and one day adopt.

    My wife and I are certain that our third child will be adopted. I need to pay that back in the worst way, considering the blessing my adoption turned out to be.

     

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  • Thanks for the explanation.

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  • Congratulations!  We've fostered one family member and at some point in the future I would be interested in getting more involved in foster parenting.  One of my best friends is a foster mom and I love everything she's able to do for her girls.  I admire what you do.  
    the things Jager will do to you - knocked up since 01/01/2012
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