Community› The Bump Month Clubs› April 2013 Moms
April 2013 Moms
New Discussion

You know what causes that... right?

farmerpinkyfarmerpinky member
in April 2013 Moms

We are officially "out" at church thanks to our super excited and supportive children's minister. There was a request to not say anything on facebook (in-laws don't know yet.) The very first person who came up to me asked me if I know what causes that! I was also approached later and asked if this was an accident and "Are you okay with it?"

I get it.  I'm chippy, super sensitive. However, where do people come up with that that is okay? Yes, by American standards, 4 is an above average number of kids. I'm not an extreme breeder though. I take care of the kids I have.  H and I are quite capable of handling this...and another if we get our way.  

 Maybe I should just get used to this. People will not change. More than 2 kids opens us up for scorn. 

If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves.-Douglas Adams
Report Reply to Post

Re: You know what causes that... right?

  • WorkinWeezelWorkinWeezel member
    You should go ahead and ask them about their sex life.  That's what they are insinuating, right?
    Met: 1/21/2005
    Married: 6/27/2008
    DS: 3/14/2010 Planned, PG first try
    M/C 6/2012
    DD: 4/22/2013 Planned, UnDx Infertility, PG on our own
    BFP: 10/28/2016 Unplanned, HUGE SURPRISE! 
    M/C 12/12/2016
    BFP: 10/27/2017 Unplanned, HUGE SURPRISE
    EDD: 7/2/2018


    Babysizer Manly Pregnancy Tracker
    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • farmerpinkyfarmerpinky member

    imageWorkinWeezel:
    You should go ahead and ask them about their sex life.  That's what they are insinuating, right?

    Like I said, I'm chippy. I replied to the first person with: "Yeah, and it's fun." and I I winked at her. I need to be better than that though. MH is on staff at the church.

    If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves.-Douglas Adams
    Report Reply
  • danuli8danuli8 member

    Wow, that is so incredibly rude. I have friends with 5 kids and they are the best parents I know.

    Maybe you could try, "Admit it, you're just jealous because YOU never get any anymore." Perhaps a bit crude for church, but they started it!

    image
    Over-40 parents...what we lack in vigor, we make up for with cunning.
    Report Reply
  • WorkinWeezelWorkinWeezel member
    You should say... "No, this is what Mary and I had in common.  My first was a gift from God; the rest are gifts from my husband's blessed sperm and the dirty acts that bring us pleasure."  Then tell her you mean Mary MAGDALENE!
    Met: 1/21/2005
    Married: 6/27/2008
    DS: 3/14/2010 Planned, PG first try
    M/C 6/2012
    DD: 4/22/2013 Planned, UnDx Infertility, PG on our own
    BFP: 10/28/2016 Unplanned, HUGE SURPRISE! 
    M/C 12/12/2016
    BFP: 10/27/2017 Unplanned, HUGE SURPRISE
    EDD: 7/2/2018


    Babysizer Manly Pregnancy Tracker
    Report Reply
  • TriciaChickTriciaChick member
    I will have 4 as well and I KNOW I will get this as well.  I think people feel they are being so original when they say that.  I love your response though.  I am totally using it!
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • Bugg22Bugg22 member

    I have been to the OB twice so far and have received comments both times BY THE OB! This is my 3rd and one OB even said "I would have gotten a puppy instead" Seriously!? She was just joking and I loved her throughout my last pregnancy but I think I will have to say something if another comment is made.

     

    Congrats on your DC #4! A nice "church" response could be "Of course it is not unplanned, unwanted, or a mistake. Do you think God makes mistakes?" :) 

    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    Report Reply
  • SRK128SRK128 member
    I will have 5. I have gotten this already. People just need to keep their comments to themselves.
    Married to Brandon since 2/14/06
    Twin Girls born on January 1st 2012:Brooklyn Avery(Brooke) & Eliana Meredith(Ellie)
    Ellie and Brooke both have Juvenile Diabetes
    Adopted a Brother and Sister in January of 2012
    Levi Ryan-October 25th 2007 and Caroline Paige(Carly)-July 23rd 2009
    Jonah Samuel born April 21st 2013
    Expecting Baby #6-June 2014!
    Report Reply
  • Monsieur_et_Madame_HaMonsieur_et_Madame_Ha member
    Wow. I cannot believe people. I say it's not the hormones that drive pregnant women crazy - it's the stupid comments people keep making.
    AlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickersimage
    imageAlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickers
    Farewell, nesticle, you will be missed
    Image and video hosting by TinyPicImage and video hosting by TinyPicImage and video hosting by TinyPic
    Report Reply
  • txleiatxleia member

    Seriously, you would think church people wouldn't ask these questions! We're "only" on #2, so I haven't gotten your particular questions, but everyone at my church is assuming we're 2 and done, and since we have a boy, they all think we want a girl this time. We actually want 4-5, and I don't care if they're all boys (DH's family is very boy!). 

    It's so frustrating to run into all the negativity - PARTICULARLY from Christians - about large families. 

    Baby #1 | BFP 8.18.10 | Luke born 4.22.11
    Baby #2 | BFP 5.18.12 | "Baby January" lost to us 5.30.12
    Baby #3 | BFP 7.25.12 | Peter Timothy due 4.7.13
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Report Reply
  • Beachbum1216Beachbum1216
    I would have been much meaner so good for you.  Something along the lines of well because this is my 4th, I do know how that works but what I don't understand is how you are such an a hole.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • tcfreedomtcfreedom

    Just get used to it - especially if you plan on more! We are on our 6th and I get the rudest comments all the time even though our kids are well cared for, well behaved, and as a family we are thrilled for one last child. 

    At this point I point out directly if people ask a rude question.  Why let them off the hook. Common courtesy is just nonexistent in some people and they need a reality check!  

    Lucky Mom to 5 girls: 09/97, 06/99, 10/02, 11/04, 04/08 & Peanut #6 due in April! Pregnancy Ticker Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    Report Reply
  • sheloveslanesheloveslane member
    I would just say, "No can you explain it to me."  I bet they are trying to be funny, or cute and just don't know what to say.  But maybe next time they will think a little.
    EDD 4-7-2006 M/C Sept 2005, EDD 10-8-2012 M/C Jan 2012, EDD 4-28-2013 M/C Sept 2012 Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
    Report Reply
  • efujanefujan member

    imageMonsieur_et_Madame_Ha:
    Wow. I cannot believe people. I say it's not the hormones that drive pregnant women crazy - it's the stupid comments people keep making.

    Yup. This. 

    Myles was so pumped about the baby . . . until he figured out he'd have to share all his toys!!!
    image
    BabyFetus Ticker>
    Report Reply
  • UberBizUberBiz member

    I still don't think 3 or 4 or even 5 kids is unreasonable. Yes it's harder these days with daycare prices and the job market and all that, but it's doable, and people do it every day! People need to watch their mouths! I'm the oldest of 5 and we were always the most well behaved kids and my parents got many compliments on how good we all were. (My dad was superintendent of an apartment complex for a while, and one of the older tenants commented to my mom, "You must use really big pots!" We still laugh about that one!)

    It will biologically be #2 for me, but FI has a 3-yr old daughter, so between us it will be #3. He wants a boy, so if this one is a girl, we may try again for a boy. So that would make 4. As long as you can provide, people should mind their own business.

    OMG too many tickers...
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickersLilypie Kids Birthday tickers
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickersLilypie First Birthday tickers
    Report Reply
  • Casie13Casie13

    imageWorkinWeezel:
    You should say... "No, this is what Mary and I had in common.  My first was a gift from God; the rest are gifts from my husband's blessed sperm and the dirty acts that bring us pleasure."  Then tell her you mean Mary MAGDALENE!

    LOL! Weez, that's awesome!  

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • CharlieTheUnicornCharlieTheUnicorn member
    Unfortunately you do have to get used to it, even though I haven't. It's one of the reasons I haven't told family. Another annoying thing for me is people assume because we have a big family and homeschool we are religious. I am one of the most UNreligious people in our own area. People need to keep their mouth shut.
    <a href="http://s1056.photobucket.com/albums/t380/CharlietheUnicorn5/?action=view
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"