- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
April 2012 Moms
ChelseyB5186
member
An open letter: To those on the board who feel left out (long)
ChelseyB5186
member
I debated writing something or not, but I decided that if it?s possible I could make one person feel a little better through this, then I?m ok with that.
I understand. Trust me, I do. I never felt like I fit in on this board, or anywhere really. I?ve never had too many friends IRL, and I?m pretty shy, and quite the homebody, so diving into an online community full of women was pretty scary. It wasn?t until towards the end of my pregnancy, and after Layne was born that I really just stopped caring as much about what people thought, and just kept posting. Mostly because I was home, stuck in bed, or just stuck in the house, but I just kept posting.
I?ll be honest, of course I really DO care what people think, and I DO want everyone to like me. I believe everyone has that- even if it?s just a little- inside them. I know this board can be a little intimidating, especially to those who don?t get a chance to post as much as some of us. All I can tell you is, please don?t be intimidated. I can only speak for myself, but I feel pretty confident saying that people such as MikeHoncho, or Creamsicle won?t judge you for jumping into a thread of ?ours? and having some fun. We are nice people! I enjoy GIFs, a lot?I don?t care what anyone else says, if you wan to throw a GIF my way, I won?t make you feel bad for it. If you want to learn how to GIF, just ask one of us! I promise you I?m not sitting behind my computer thinking, ?who is this person and why are they talking to me??
It?s a forum, it?s hard to get a good sense of what everyone is feeling or thinking, so the best thing you can do is just be yourself, and try to participate as much as you want/can. The ?cliques? that people are talking about are simply women who have fun together online, and can relate to each other. It?s not that anyone is excluding anyone at all. If you feel like you would like to get to know someone better, by all means, try! Ask me or them a question, try to get to know someone on here that you have always wanted to, just take that first step. Like I said, I know what it feels like to not feel like I am included, or part of the ?cool crowd,? haha, I by no means am what I consider ?cool!? Heck, I still am intimidated by some of the women on this board (mostly because I feel like some are so smart and I would sound dumb trying to have a conversation with them), but I like everyone here, and I want to try to form relationships, so I just participate.
I hope this comes across the way I'm feeling it should, I genuinely want some of you ladies who feel like they don't belong to know that you do, and you don't have to feel so worried about fitting in or trying to make people like you. Maybe I'm just a sap, and most likely there will be some that laugh at me for doing this, but I hope this makes some of you ladies smile.
In conclusion, please don?t feel left out, I don?t think of anyone as
?not cool enough? to be a part of this wonderful community. There is
plenty of love to go around 
This discussion has been closed.
Re: An open letter: To those on the board who feel left out (long)
Chelsey, get out of my dreams. And into my car.
But really, I just posted something similar to this, but less sweet and genuine. I agree with all of this. I have never thought, "UGH who is this bish trying to talk to me!?" I don't feel that way towards anyone on here. In fact, it's the opposite. I want more people to interact on here! And say stupid sh!t or be goofy or just be who they are. I understand not everyone has a lot of time on their hands but just reach out to people. It's the only way to get closer. I have never posted something and thought "This is just for Cream and Chelsey" EVER. It's an open forum, jump on in, please! It makes it more fun! Don't feel like you are intruding or being rude.
I'm just now catching up on the posts from today, but as a person who always feels left out and clique-proof, I appreciate you posting this.
Land before I hit post, I will clarify that I mean IRL, not necessarily here.
Sigh. No wonder ppl don't like me. I tried to edit my post so the grammar clique would like me and instead I quoted myself by mistake, so now the Interwebz clique won't accept me either.
I wish you and I lived closer together, I really really do. That's not meant to sound creepy
Same here. When you said you were having a mini gtg, I started calculating travel times. I think we would have fun together. Although our babies would probably get us kicked out of everywhere. Lol
JFTR, I think all you bishes are hilarious, I love reading your posts and I don't feel left out of anything. I think what people get upset/offended/feel left out of is when the pictures go in the signatures and the avatars and then there are pet names and whatnot. I wont lie that when I get called out and told I am loved, it makes me feel all puffy purple heart swirly but not everyone gets that and when the pictures go up, etc, people feel left out and then call you cliquey.
Again, I don't really care but I am pretty sure this is one thing that can make people feel alienated. I get that it comes from good fun and laughter but it still makes people feel left out. Take that however you wish and either stop doing it or don't, but thought I would put my two sense into it.
Mmmm kay, enough Joe Sound advice from your big sister.
metucker, your dog rocks. I didn't forget that, nor will I ever. Your dogs rocks, you rock.
tiannalee, point taken for sure. And an excellent point at that. As excited as I was in the thread to be Craig Robinson, I was extremely hesitant to put it in my signature because I had a strong feeling of how people might feel alienated. It's also why it's hard sometimes to answer threads that ask for specific names to shout out. I have always read here but contributed rarely in the beginning, so I know exactly what you mean. It's only recently I've upped my activity, and I still remember what it's like to be someone rarely mentioned. So, that being said, I'll try to remain diligent in taking what you've said to heart, truly.
I get where you're coming from, but I'm not nearly cool or popular enough for anyone to feel offended that they're not mentioned in my signature haha, KWIM? Like, in my sig I'm a dumpy guy with greying hair and a funny sweater
I just thought it was silly.
Honestly, if people are truly upset about my siggy, and are annoyed when they see it, that stinks, and it makes me sad, and I'll change it. I try to include everyone, and I guess it's just me being naive to think that it wasn't a big deal.
Here are my thoughts. I used to feel left out here and there. I noticed that some posts that I would start would only get a few people or no people commenting at all. Adventually I figured out that my posts are just not as interesting as some others or just doesn't connect the same way. That's ok. I don't have to be loved by everyone and I enjoy the interactions that happen here.
Edit for clearity
Holy hell, you have an amazing memory! And thanks
I heart you Chelsey!
If someone gets on you about your spelling I would just let it go.
to GIFs teach us poor suckers!
I never would've guessed that English was not your first language!
Love!
I've gone through points where I wished I got more love on here, but it is what it is. I didn't post a lot while I was pg because I can't post from work. I posted a lot this summer while I was on leave. Now that I am back at work, I will be posting nights and weekends again. I am sure I will miss out on a lot, and I am ok with that. No hard feelings towards anyone that has more time to post than I do.
A15 January Siggy Challenge-
This. I jumped on the board late (I think after J was born), so I have a hard time keeping up. I appreciate how welcoming you all have been (and for the votes in the photo contests!!!!)
I agree Miniray, I would have never guessed!
Also Hua, I'm a puppies and rainbows kind of gal too...maybe mixed with a bit of snark for funsies :P