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February 2013 Moms
hnhoffman
member
Should we tell
hnhoffman
member
We have our names picked out for a boy or a girl but not sure if we want to share them with the family. Our boy name is Casey Martin that will make him have the same initials as daddy and his great grandfather with same middle name as great grandfather. For a girl we picked Hayden Charlotte. H after Heather mommy and C after Chris daddy. When my brother and his girlfriend picked out names my family was very judgmental. What would you do? My thought is if we tell them these ARE the names they will keep opinions hushed up.
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Re: Should we tell
We kept it a secret with DS and will with this one too. It's a fun surprise, especially if everyone already knows the sex, and once the baby is actually here, people are so excited they comment less on the name. It's harder to be mean too when it's attached to an actual person they can hold.
Everyone has an opinion on your name choices, so unless you want to hear it, I'd keep it to yourself for now.
Given the details, I would not tell them. I wouldn't risk the drama. If they were judgmental to your brother, they will be to you, too.
I personally don't want to share names this time around--especially with my ILs. They are generally great people, but it's true that people feel they can give whatever input they want when it comes to babies and I had some awful conversatinos (one of which ended with me in tears after MIL talking over and over again about how ugly DD's name is and how awful it would be to name a child that) with my ILs about what became DD's name. DH doesn't really understand and won't agree to not tell, but we haven't decided on a boys name and we know our girl name (Lydia) won't cause anyone to hyperventilate so at least that's good.
I think your names are fine, but then again I though Aurelia was a great name and my ILs all had a different opinion! In the end it doesn't matter because, even though it was stressful at the time, now that's her name and no one comments on it. I will admit I can't ever forget the hateful things my MIL said about it and how she would go on and on to her friends about it though...
If your H will get on board with not sharing I would just go the route of, "We haven't decided on anything yet" rather than saying you're keeping it a secret. For some reason when I hear people aren't sharing the name it just sounds spiteful to me even though I completely understand the reasoning. I just think it sounds better to lie a little and say you aren't sure rather than you just don't want ot share.
I completely agree, we told our families our top two favorite names and the responses were rude, and my inlaws insisted if we had a boy we had to name it after his grand father or they would refuse to call the baby by his given name. After that we decided that we will not be telling anyone until they meet the baby for the first time, which did cause some hurt feelings but I would rather them be a little sour than to take away the excitement of naming our LO.
agreed. i told my parents the boy names we were thinking about which are 'ethnic' in that they acknowledge my husband's ethnicity(but not made up crazy names or anything). my mom told me that those names would not be the name of her grandson. well, guess what? my baby- not yours. i'm accustomed to my mom's my way is the only way perspective in life so it rolls off me at this point. but if your family's criticism will hurt you then keep it to yourself.
on a side note, i also get kinda creeped out when people refer to babies in utero by their name. i don't know why, but it is a pet peeve of mine. which is yet another reason i'm not interested in sharing the child's name until it is actually here (by which i mean outside of me).
Are you team green? If so, I'd wait til baby is born. If you're finding out if you're pink or blue, I'd wait til you know what you're having before sharing names. That way it's set in stone and people can judge or say whatever they want, but your minds are made up and you've committed to the names so the chatter won't matter (ha! I rhymed!) Just seems less likely for people to try to sway you or whatever when you have a gender to put with the name.
Cute names by the way!