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Adoption
lafayettegirl
member
And the light bulb just went on!
lafayettegirl
member
in Adoption
You guys know we are struggling with our local agency. Well, we attended a mandatory training session with them yesterday. There were 4 foster families and probably 15-20 waiting to adopt families. We had to go around the room and introduce ourselves and say how long we have been waiting. Now we understand why the agency would not tell us the wait times. There were 2 of us (us and one other couple) who have been waiting 7 months. Every other adoptive couple has been waiting between 1-2.5 years! DH and I could not believe it. The more we learn, the more we realize this agency should be called "We encourage Birth Moms to Parent Agency." Commendable in its own right, but if that is what you want your agency to be, don't call yourself an adoption agency because you aren't promoting adoption. UGH!
Just another thing to add to our growing list of how not to go about adopting!
But, on a good note, we have had 7 hits in 4 weeks by branching out to multiple agencies and working with our adoption consultant. The light bulb has gone on!
Cervical Cancer Survivor since 2007
TTC Since 2008
IUI#1 = BFN
IUI#2 = BFN
IUI#3 = BFN
IUI#4 = BFN
IVF #1 = BFN
FET #1 = BFN
FET #2 = BFN
FET #3 = BFN
IVF #2 = BFN
IVF #3 = BFN
FET #4 = BFN
FET #5 = BFP!!! 06/10/2011
Miscarriage 06/21/2011
Adoption Application Submitted 09/2011, Personal Documents Submitted 11/18/2011, Home Visit 12/16/2011, Officially Waiting!!! 01/21/2013 MATCHED!!!! 01/24/2013 Baby Boy Born!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: And the light bulb just went on!
We're now working with 4 other agencies across the US and we have a consultant who sends us potential situations, so things are definitely getting better and closer!
Sorry you are frustrated.
I think you will find that the idea of helping birth moms find resources to parent will be a theme among agencies. I don't think any agency would say we want to encourage adoption over parenting... it becomes an ethical issue... and I know you get it. Parenting, when an option, should be supported.
My point... i wouldn't strive to find agencies that don't have that messaging... rather find agencies that talk numbers. Numbers of placements per year verses families enrolled. The closer to 1:1 ration, the better. Think of the numbers.
Silliestbunny, you are so right! I just wish I had a better understanding of that in January. We totally would have gone with an agency that had better numbers.
Live and learn though, and I'm feeling better about our new agencies every day!
Yep!! I may sound like a broken record to newbies... but I remind people when talking stats w/agencies YOU MUST DRILL DOWN.... even match rates can be deceiving when you start comparing PAPs that are open to EVERYTHING vs PAPs that are closed to EVERYTHING. You must look at similar situations to get a good perspective.