Babysitter giving baby water!

Excitedbridetobe215 · September 2012

Hey everyone. So I found out from my 8 year old step daughter that my babysitter gave my 12 week old baby boy 4 ounces of water last week! Before I started sending him there I specifically told her not to give him any water because he's still too little, well I have no idea why she did this but then when I asked her about it she lied to my face and said "no I never give him water", but water from the bottled water I send was missing so I know she did and I know my step daughter wasn't lying. Thing is I send extra formula so she didn't put formula in the water and it boggled my mind as to why she would do this. I sat down and spoke to the babysitter today where I asked if she had given him water and that's when she lied and said no, now I'm nervous she might be giving him water behind my back. I made sure to say it in a nice way and I gave her a note book to track everytime a bottle is going in his mouth, but I can't help but be wondering if she might do it again. She's a family friend so I don't know her too well but she is a minister and I want to believe she'll respect and do what I'm asking of her but how do I know what happens when I'm not there? Am I over reacting to this?? Help!

pammi2003 · September 2012

You need to tell her again (In a polite, yet firm tone) That no water should be given to your baby before 6 months. Tell her of the dangers of water toxicity and that he is already getting water from the breastmilk or formula.

I would be nervous on sending him back to her also because that will now be on the back of my mind.

Good luck!

maryhauth · September 2012

I had the same situation happen to me when my son was a month old. I was at my parents house helping my mom in the yard and my sister was watching my son. By the time I went in and caught her she had already given him an ounce of water.

SunAndRain · September 2012

Perhaps you can review with her LO's feeding plan and then ask if she has any questions or concerns. If she asks about her own ideas then it opens an opportunity for you to explain that you don't want to deviate from your plan and provide her an explanation as to why (tell her you'll get back to her with additional info if you are not prepared to explain the exact reasons - then make sure you get back to her). Ask her if she agrees to follow this plan. That way you can be assured you are both on the same page. If she deviates from it you can then have a conversation with her about why she went back on your agreement.

The thing is that IF she lied she may feel like water is not a big deal and no way is she going to get in trouble for giving "harmless" water to a baby. Not that it is an excuse but I do think all too often when we say "jump" we expect those who work for us to say "how high?", forgetting that they too have brains and opinions and probably don't respond well to orders and dictatorship. So if they perceive something isn't a big deal they brush it under the rug.

Certainly you are the parent and you make the decisions. But motivating someone to follow what you want them to do often requires a bit of finesse. Monetary incentives (i.e. salary) has its limitations.

Meery82 · September 2012

Explain water toxicity and if you find out she does it again, fire her.

msrkilpatrick · September 2012

If you're sure she lied to you then she should be fired. I wouldn't be able to trust someone who lied to me about anything. This sucks because it's so hard to find a good babysitter. Good luck.

jasminelorraine20 · September 2012

I'd fire her on the spot if you know for a fact she's lying. It's in the best interest of LO that he is taken care of properly and not given water, especially when you specifically told her not to. You're always going to worry about this when she's watching him.

sam19 · September 2012

If you don't trust her to look after your child properly then you need to find a new babysitter. Giving water at this age is not OK. I'd let her know that your step daughter told you she gave the baby water and explain to her why giving water to a baby is so young. But honestly, I'd just find someone else. You obviously don't trust her.