Anybody have really crappy siblings?

Monkeybabe · August 2012

Maybe it's because I'm in the one and done, unless I accidentally get KU, crowd, but I wanted to say that I don't think siblings are necessarily great play pals. My siblings and I were all on top of each other in age: my sister's were 15 months apart, then I was a year and 8 months after that, and then my brother a year and 9 months after me. Growing up, I lived in fear of my oldest sister, and because of her, I also feared my other two siblings. My oldest sister was and is BSC, and she kicked the crap out of me on a regular basis, when my parents weren't around. She also cowed my other sister and brother into following her lead. I was the smallest and weakest, so they'd all push me down and hurt me, and take my toys and destroy them. I have great parents, they treated us fairly, paid attention and played with us, but mental illness runs in my family.

I have a good relationship my my other sister and brother now, but I wouldn't say we're close. My sister and I talk on the phone a lot, but our babies are the glue in that relationship, because before, we had nothing in common.

According to my dad, my oldest sister was extremely difficult from the start, was never happy and continued that way into adulthood. He said that I was like Zoe is. Zoe's a great baby and I'd rather she have great friends rather than a potentially totally batshit sibling.

huahualove · August 2012

You aren't alone. My mom does't speak to her siblings because they are all crazy. One of DH's brother does crappy things like when he was in the city we live in for vacation, he didn't tell us, just showed up at Dh's business to poop, and then left. They didn't want to meet DS the whole week they were here. Mind you that DH and his brother talk on the phone every day. My mom always has said that all families are fcvked up, just some are fcvked up more than others.

Ruby412 · August 2012

I don't have issues with my siblings, but I wanted to pop in and say how gorgeous your new siggy pic of Zoe is. It is truly melt-worthy!

lauranicole91 · August 2012

Yeah siblings aren't always buddies. I had a decent relationship with my brother, although the 5 years gap really affected how close we really could have been. We were always just in such different parts of our lives. I wanted to play hide and seek, he wanted to play WoW. I wanted to watch Blue's Clues and he wanted to watch Beavis and Butthead. I wished we had been closer but we didn't have a bad relationship.

My mom on the other hand had a HORRIBLE sibling situation. She had two older brothers, the younger of the two is about 6 years older and he did unbelievable things to her. Like things that would make everyone vomit in their mouth. Obviously this is not the norm or a reason to rationally consider when deciding whether to be one and done, but in my mom's case, being a only child and "alone, spoiled, and bored" would have leaps and bounds better than the childhood she had. Just fartin'...

Monkeybabe, I am so sorry you had such a rocky relationship with your siblings. Sad Oh and as far as you being one and done, Zoe is cute enough to cover the cuteness of 3 children! Enjoy that little bundle and "spoil" her to death!

AshleyDG83 · August 2012

Ruby412:
I don't have issues with my siblings, but I wanted to pop in and say how gorgeous your new siggy pic of Zoe is. It is truly melt-worthy!

I've been meaning to make a post dedicated to Zoe's cuteness. Love the new siggy.

I have two brothers and we have always gotten along (for the most part). My younger brother got into drugs (meth mostly) in his late teens/early twenties and we didn't have much of a relationship. Thankfully, he has been clean and sober for almost 3 years and has recently decided to start going to seminary. If he wouldn't have gotten out of the drugs, I would still love him but he wouldn't be a part of my life.

MH has 3 sisters and can't stand the oldest. She was a nightmare growing up and still is now. She hates me (and mostly everyone else too)

dubs3 · August 2012

Yup. I'm one of 6 kids, and I have two brothers who are alcoholic, drug-addicted, all around horrible human beings.

My one brother is married to a crazy, piece of trash woman who has had 3 of her 4 children taken away from her (she's addicted to prescription meds), and is currently in jail for the 4th time this year bc she stole her grandmother's credit card (while her grandma was sick in the hospital!!) and took it to the Wal-Mart she had just gotten busted at for shoplifting 2 months prior, and tried to buy a couple hundred bucks worth of stuff. What is my darling brother doing while his crazy wife is in jail? Paying hookers to come over and give him a little help while his 1 yo son is in the next room. Seriously. My poor parents, God bless them, have custody over my brother's 4 yo son, and are trying like crazy to get custody over the 1 year old. I'm completely disgusted by my brother and his wife for being abusive, selfish, horrible parents, and would not care if I never talked to them again.

My other brother is no better- he's an alcoholic who hits my parents up for money constantly, and has 2 children that live with their mother and her abusive boyfriend. He has custody every other weekend, but mostly just pawns them off on my parents so he's able to go out drinking and not have the responsibility of his kids. He treats everyone like they owe him something bc he's a marine who did 2 tours in Iraq, and sees nothing wrong with the life he lives. I've also made it clear to him that I want nothing to do with him.

With all that being said, I have two sisters and another brother who are the kindest, funniest, best people I know, and I couldn't imagine my life without them. They are my best friends, and I adore them. They're the reason I want to give my DD siblings. I have no idea how my other brothers turned out so completely different, i just pray that my kids turn out nothing like them!

Monkeybabe · August 2012

dubs - I am so sorry your brothers suck so bad. Your one brother's wife sounds like my cousin, who had her four children taken away. Three all at once, then she had another daughter, who ate meth off the floor and they took her away, too. Thankfully, her older sister adopted all her kids, so they're still together. This chick faked two seizures at her little sister's wedding in order to get attention. When someone mentioned that they called 911, because she had been convulsing for so long, she jumped up and ran down the street because there's a warrant out for her arrest.

My oldest sister lives with my parents and makes their lives hell. They know that they're enabling her, but they don't want to kick her out and make her sink or swim because they're pretty sure she'll sink and they don't want that on their consciences. She's never had a job in her life, aside from briefly being a receptionist at my parents' office and she has a major pot smoking habit, so she's a major drain on my parents financially. (They only put up with the pot, because she's got arthritis and is allergic to the medication for it.) I wouldn't be sad if she disappeared forever. I think I'd be relieved for my parents' sake.

ETA: Thanks to everyone that think Zoe is pretty. She's my light, for sure.

huahualove · August 2012

Do any of you ever look at you LO and think of what they will be like when they are older? Like I hope ds isn't a horrible human being. I'm sure all of your parents when raising your siblings didn't think they would turn out the ways they did when they were little babies. I don't think ds will be that way, but you never know.

dubs3 · August 2012

Monkeybabe:
dubs I am so sorry your brothers suck so bad. Your one brother's wife sounds like my cousin, who had her four children taken away. Three all at once, then she had another daughter, who ate meth off the floor and they took her away, too. Thankfully, her older sister adopted all her kids, so they're still together. This chick faked two seizures at her little sister's wedding in order to get attention. When someone mentioned that they called 911, because she had been convulsing for so long, she jumped up and ran down the street because there's a warrant out for her arrest.My oldest sister lives with my parents and makes their lives hell. They know that they're enabling her, but they don't want to kick her out and make her sink or swim because they're pretty sure she'll sink and they don't want that on their consciences. She's never had a job in her life, aside from briefly being a receptionist at my parents' office and she has a major pot smoking habit, so she's a major drain on my parents financially. They only put up with the pot, because she's got arthritis and is allergic to the medication for it. I wouldn't be sad if she disappeared forever. I think I'd be relieved for my parents' sake.nbsp;ETA: Thanks to everyone that think Zoe is pretty. She's my light, for sure.nbsp;

Omg!! Your cousin DOES sound like my SIL...how do people do such horrible things?! I hope her kids are ok, its people like that that make me wonder how just anybody can become a parent. Thank God all the kids could stay together, hopefully that helped to make things a little less traumatic.

I know exactly how you feel, im so sorry your sister is choosing to treat your mom and dad like that...your parents sound like my parents they would do anything for anyone! I hate how my brothers take advantage of it. My poor parents have had custody of my nephew for 2 years now my nephew is 4..,they're retired and should be able to do whatever they like, instead they are starting all over again with kids bc my brother and SIL refuse to get their act together. It makes me sick to think about it.

Hua I think about that all the time! I wonder how my 2 brothers turned out to be so horrible, when every other kid in the family turned out pretty decent! From how they act, you would think that they were raised in a completely different household!

KFCupcake · August 2012

I do. I always roll my eyes when people say "oh, we will have them close together so they will be BFF's!". My sister and I are 18 months apart (I'm older), and we couldn't be more different. She went down a rough road, and is still doing it. Drinking, smoking, drugs since she was 16, almost died while drinking and driving, and has been picked up 2 more times after that happened. She's 29 and still relies on my parents for everything. Financial, a place to crash when her boyfriend and her have fights, rides to and from work, etc. I never hear from her, ever. When she found out I was pregnant, the only thing she said to me was "You can't name it Lucy or Jameson, because those are MY names." While I was up for Christmas last year, she came to my parents and spent the whole time in my parents' room watching the Kardashians. She made this elaborate meal at my parents using their food, and then packed everything up and left, leaving us NONE. Then, she wanted to take MH and I out on our last night in town, we waited and waited, she stood us up. If we weren't sisters I wouldn't want to be in her life.

katieh1017 · August 2012

I have 2 brothers both younger than me. My middle brother and I are 15 months apart and my other brother and I are 5 years apart. Growing up we were never close and I hated being the only girl. I always felt left out especially since both brothers played baseball and my parents lives revolved around that. Now i am kinda close with my younger brother but not really like some siblings are. We text and check in on one another but that's it. My middle brother and I don't get along at all and he is 30 min away. He's a compulsive liar and in his teens he got into lots of trouble with the law and drugs. He's cleaned himself up, he has a family, good job but he is just the biggest asssshole I have ever met. He treats people like crap and acts like everyone owes him something. He has the stereotypical middle child poor me syndrome and he's 36. My brothers always teased me, called me fat etc.

My dad talks to one of the 3 of his siblings. One is weird, that's the one he talks to lol.. The other two are liers and couldn't keep a job if their life depended on it. My one uncle stole my grandmas credit cards and charged a bunch of porn on it. Loser. And then when she died he cleaned out her bank account, actually she was in the hospital dying when he did this. My moms brother was a lot older than her and died of alcoholism. She is close to her sister. I love my aunt.

So yea, it could be worse but I never had a great and happy family that all got along. There was a comment about only children not understanding family dynamics. I was not an only child and my experience with family dynamics is shiit.

I am one and done but it has nothing to do with the above.

Christina_Diane · August 2012

My little brother is younger than me by 6 years. We are not close. I disagree with about everything he does.

danandbethg · August 2012

I have 2 brothers...1 is a half brother who is 10 years older than me, the other is a full blooded brother that is 8 years younger. My older brother is a loser that is currently in jail for his um-teenth offense for driving after revoke. He has also done time for possession and a multitude of other things. My younger brother is a selfish spoiled brat. I remember when he was born and he had medical problems. My mom spoiled him rotten from then on. It never stopped. My parents came out to spend the holidays with me and my DH last year....the first time I spent Christmas with my family since 2002. My brother is STILL whining about it, to this day. I tried to do the right thing and ask him to be LO's god father. Due to the time difference and that he works 3rd shift, I asked him to call or text me when he had a minute. He never did. So, my uncle will be the godfather. He was 10 when I moved out and I feel like he is the same spoiled kid today, at 24, at he was then.

hass2001 · August 2012

My sister and I are complete opposites, we don't have much in common. I love love love her to death but we just aren't that close. She lives on the east coast and is a very free spirit. She won't have a close relationship with her niece either because she is never moving back home. It doesn't bother me because we were never close to begin with. I have girlfriends that I'm much closer with and talk to / see more often.

Eta: so bump mobile doesn't let me see the whole subject title. I thought this was just a post about siblings. I wouldn't consider her a crappy sister, we are just different.

Marie509 · September 2012

I wouldn't say I have/had 'crappy' siblings. We are all just WAY different. I'm one of 5, and I almost never talk to my older brother (3 yrs older), I have more of a relationship with my older and younger sister, but they still aren't great. I can handle them in small doses. When my little brother was in the army I talked to him A LOT, and tried to get him help after he came home from Afghanistan...but, as you all know, he never did.

We were really mean to one another growing up, but if any 'outsiders' were mean to any of us - we all would stand up and protect the other. It was a mentality of 'i can be mean to you because you're my family, but if someone else is mean to you - they're gonna pay'

Musiclover2012 · September 2012

but but but how can you deny the world of another amazing beautiful baby like Zoe??? No but seriously you have to do what is right for you? I only have one sister (2.5 years older) we were really close growing up but then when she met her craphead husband she changed, became a hermit and hardly ever gave me the time of day. We had a major falling out when DS1 was born and we have not spoken in 4 years. It's sad, I feel like an only child (don't flame me, but I liked having a sister before she turned all hermit like). Most of my friends are close to their siblings, despite the differences. My boys are close so far and I hope it stays that way. They don't have to be alike, but I'd like them to at least respect eachother.

jenbelsan · September 2012

I'm the third of four kids, we are all 1year apart, except the youngest was born 3 years after me. We used to beat the living snot out of each other, basically b/c my father is an abusive alcoholic, and we had no other outlet for our anger. The only one we didn't hurt was my younger brother,he was just too sweet (still is). We have all been through massive counseling, and are better with each other, but there is still a lot of hostility between my sister and older brother.

we also had a lot of fun together. We had built in playmates when the neighborhood kids were away, or we went on vacation, so I admit, that was good for us. But as an adult, I have a much closer relationship with my friends than my siblings.

We are one and done, due to age and finances. Joshua wasn't planned, but we are so happy we have him! We will try to keep him a normal human being

And I agree with all the pps, Zoe is gorgeous!!!

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