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To POAS or not to POAS

Raggedy1Raggedy1 member
in Infertility

This is my first IVF.

I have never had a positive pregnancy test in my life.

DH is going to be out-of-town on Beta day, next Wednesday, and I won't see him until Friday. There is absolutely no way I wouldn't tell him the result as soon as the doctor called me with the lab result Wednesday.  Exactly what I always dreamed of - being alone and telling him via telephone.

If you were me, despite the RE's adamant warnings not to, would you POAS on Monday night or Tuesday morning so we could share in the moment, whether joyous or devastating? 

Info... we transferred 2 7-cell Grade 2 embryos on Day 3 on 8/25.

(Grow embies, grow!) 

TTC #1 2+ Years with Unexplained IF
1st & Only BFP: 1st IVF w/ ICSI, 3dt of 2 7-cell, grade 2 embryos on 8/25/12
Beta #1 9/5: 87.2 BFP! - Beta #2 9/7: 248 - 1st US @ 6w3d Two Heartbeats! - MoDi Girls!
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Re: To POAS or not to POAS

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    Raggedy1Raggedy1 member
    Other background: I've always POAS before... somehow it helped to soften the blow of my 5 gazillion BFNs to test daily after 10dpt and allow it to sink in before AF started.
    TTC #1 2+ Years with Unexplained IF
    1st & Only BFP: 1st IVF w/ ICSI, 3dt of 2 7-cell, grade 2 embryos on 8/25/12
    Beta #1 9/5: 87.2 BFP! - Beta #2 9/7: 248 - 1st US @ 6w3d Two Heartbeats! - MoDi Girls!
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    LIQueenLIQueen
    I am different, I would love for my husband to be out of town when I find out so I have time to think of a special way to tell him.  No matter what we will be so happy after all we have gone through health wise, but I would love to have time to be creative with it :)  If you don't want to do that I say then test before.  I am totally going to test before my beta because I dont want to find out it is negative and be surprised that it is at a doctors office or from the doctor...I want to give myself time to process that it most likely is no.
    7/18/12-1st RE appointment CD2 blood work taken. Told to move straight to IVF. Starting BC pills and FSH injections plus Lupron. Hopefully doing ET in September Off BCP March 2011 Started TTC July 2011 7 months TTC with no luck an then.... Diagnosed 2/24/12 with 2 Ovarian Cysts. 3/22/12-Lap to remove cysts, look for endo, and see if tubes are clear. 3/22/12-Diagnosed with Severe Endo(tubes are clear). 4/4/12-Post op OBGYN appointment. Told chances of conceiving naturally are very low, but told conceiving in the next few months is our best chance due to being cleaned out during Lap. Referred to a RE. RE said IVF is our only chance to get pregnant. Told only a 20% chance even with two put in. 9/5-Lupron 9/20 Stims(Menopur & Follistim) 9/30 Trigger time 10/2 ER 10/3 fert report-out of 7 eggs retrieved only 2 fertilized. Hello "Thing 1 and Thing 2!" Kinda sad there is none to freeze. Because only 2 we will have 2DT to get them back into a natural envionment 10/4 ET. Found out that only 1 divided. We love you "Thing 2." Thing 1 is now snuggled inside me and we are praying it will be our take home baby! **Did not even make it to my beta, the day before on 10/16/12 I got my F'in period** Such a stab in the heart. Nov 2012-Moving onto domestic newborn adoption! Can't wait for my take home baby. We will try IVF again after 1-2 years of a clear head. Need a break from infertility treatments/issues for my mental sanity! image
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    jmorta04jmorta04 member
    My H will be at work all day tomorrow and prob wont be home until 8 or 9 tomorrow night. I haven't POAS and don't plan to. I haven't decided if I will call him once I hear about my beta results or if I will wait for him to get home. I don't want to ruin his day at work if it's bad news. I guess it's just a really personal decision but I haven't wanted to POAS and ruin being PUPO.
    Married July 2011; TTC since April 2011; DX: MFI
    IVF #1 in August 2012: BFP!
    L was born on May 5, 2013, 8lb. 6oz.
    PAIF/SAIF welcome!

    Our Project Make A Baby

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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    firesirenfiresiren member
    I am a chronic POAS'er.   I always thought it was easier than getting a phone call.  Whatever you choose I wish you good luck :)
     36 DH 33 TTC for over 3 years
    First mini-IVF Sept 2011... Only 1 egg! ... BFN
    Switching RE
    IVF#2 May 2012 9 eggs and only 2 sperm, WTH!
    BFN
    IVF #3 March 2013~Tesa with back-up Donor Sperm,Tesa, unsuccessful used DS~ Chemical :(   

    Switching RE's within practice

    2 frosties waiting for us, November 2013!!!!!   Transferred 2 "average" blasts 11/20/2013
    BFP!!!!!!!  Boy/Girl Twins!!!!!! Due 08/08/2014

    My Blog




    *~God gives his hardest battles to his toughest solders. Unknown.
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    LosingHope123LosingHope123

    I have done it both ways.  My first transfer I POAS that morning (I had a feeling it didn't work) and it was negative.  It was still a blow when the call came in but I was expecting it so I think somehow it was a little easier..

    My last transfer I did not POAS.. The negative was really tough to take because we really really really thought it had woked...

    This is our last cycle before we move on.. I didn't want to be caught off guard this time.  My husband took tomorrow (beta day) off to be home for the news.  Waiting home alone for the news is absolutely the worst feeling in the world.  It was awful having to tell him it didn't work... This time we did POAS 6 dpt and 8dpt and will again tomorrow morning to make sure the line is getting darker.   As long as it is darker tomorrow than it was yesterday I will feel more confident during hte day tomorrow... My RE never said anything about not POAS and the nurse once told me she didn't think she could hold off if it were her...

    GL with your decision!

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    CutieGirlLissieCutieGirlLissie member
    I can't really give you any advice since I have yet to be PUPO (FET#1 will be next week) but I am also not sure what I am going to do. On the one hand, I get why some people say it's easier to deal with the BFN call if you know ahead of time, but then again I can't imagine how horribly long the days leading up to Beta would be if i did POAS and got a negative... I also kinda want to be alone when I get the news so that I can come up with a cute way to tell DH if it is positive. I know at this point it isn't a surprise since we are going through all this but I have dreamed about how I would surprise my DH since before IF so I'm not giving up on that :) GL with whatever you decide!
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    Hopeful1981Hopeful1981 member
    You should totally do it!!!

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    Me: 31 DH: 42 w/ perfect superhuman SA TTC since 01/2011, all tests normal

    09/2012: BFP! Beta #1: 117 Beta #2 165 Beta #3 253 Beta #4 3273 Beta #5 19,808 EDD: June 3 2013,
    u/s at 6w1d, saw one beautiful heartbeat, a strong 172 bpm! Can't wait to meet our baby blob!

    06/14/2013:  Our beautiful bunny boy born nearly two weeks late! 

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    vpinevpine member
    I stopped taking tests long ago, got tired and depressed seeing BFN (that affected me more than AF arriving) so I would wait until Wed to tell DH sad news over the phone or Fri to tell DH the happy news. I have patience and surprise ready for DH when my BFP arrives one day.  Good luck!
    Me: 32, DH: 34.
    Trying since Jan 2011. Unexplained IF.
    2 IUIs = BFN.
    1 IVF (Dec 2013) = BFN.
    FET, 2 frosties (June 13, 2014)

    14dp5dt-June 27 -BFP, beta 2061. 2nd beta >5000, 3rd beta >5000, 2 sacs 06/30.
    Twin Girls - 02/11/15 - at 37 weeks (no NICU, home with me at 3 days).
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    YankeeNavyWifeYankeeNavyWife

    I refuse to ever pee on a stick again until I can be positive that it'll be positive... like AFTER a positive blood test. I just cannot take another negative staring back at me in the bathroom.

    Good luck with your decision. Hoping for the best!

    image
    Dx Hypothyroid 2009 - Dx PCOS 3/2011- TTC since March 2010
    DH: Perfect
    April 2011 - HSG - Normal/Clear but tilted uterus
    May 2011 - Start Metformin
    June 2011 - SIS - Arcuate but normal uterus
    July 2011 - 100mg Clomid Cycle cancelled - No response
    August-September 2011 - Break for oral & eye surgery
    Oct 2011 - Femara 7.5mg + Metformin 1500mg + Novarel trigger + IUI #1 = BFN
    Nov-Mar 2012- Break due to DH ship schedule
    April 2012 - Femara 7.5mg + Metformin 1500mg + Novarel trigger + IUI #2 = BFFN
    May 2012 - Femara 7.5mg + Metformin 1500mg + Trigger + IUI #3 = BFFN
    June 2012 - Femara cycle cancelled - No response
    Jul-Aug 2012 - Break, getting our financials in order
    September 2012 - IVF w/ ICSI and AZH
    9/11/12 - ER (34 retrieved, 24 mature, 18 fertilized)
    9/16/12 - ET - 5dt of 2 perfect blasts and 7 frosties!!!
    Beta #1 - 10/1/12 - BFP!!! 2000+
    Beta #2 - 10/3/12 - 4881
    Beta #3 - 10/5/12 - 8570
    First u/s - 10/9/12 - 6w0d - 2 sacs!!!
    Second u/s - 10/16/12 - 7w0d - 2 babies with 2 strong hbs!!
    First OB appt - 11/5/12 - "Baby A" looks great, good hb and movement, measuring 10w0d
    "Baby B" stopped growing at 8 weeks :0(
    12/5/12 - Baby looks great at 14w2d - 165bpm heartrate!
    January 4th, 2013 - Lost our Baby Girl, Faith at 18w3d
    Emergency D&C to clear infection
    We love you and miss you little one
    image
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    emikatemikat member

    I think I need to know before.  I don't want to be unprepared when I get the phone call.  It's such a personal decision.  Good luck!

     

    image




    TTC 10/11. IUI 2/12. BFP 3/8/12. 4/26/12 missed mc. RE consult 5/17/12. IVF #1 ER 7/13/12 53R, 41M ICSIed, 32F, 8 5d, 6 6d blasts - all PGD/frozen. PGD results 1 normal M and 1 normal F, 1 maybe M. FET 9/6, transferred 1 F embie. Beta 9/15 BFN. FET#2 planned for 11/2012 put off until 2013. Surprise BFP 11/21/12!! My son was born on 7/24/13!

    FET 4/28/2015 - Transferred 1 M embie. 5/6/15 BFP!

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    Julie21613Julie21613 member
    *****I refuse to ever pee on a stick again until I can be positive that it'll be positive... like AFTER a positive blood test. I just cannot take another negative staring back at me in the bathroom.

    Good luck with your decision. Hoping for the best!******

     

    This!

    Me 35, DH 36
    TTC summer 2008
    Diagnose me. DOR, DH perfect
    IUI # 1 6/2010, BFN
    IUI # 2 8/2010, BFN
    IVF # 1 10/2010 Canceled poor response
    IVF 1.2 12/2010 BFP! mc 6 weeks 2 days
    Mental health break for 10 months
    IVF # 2 10/2011 BFN
    IVF # 3 5/2012 BFP! 10 eggs retrieved (best ever)
    7 fertilized transferred 3
    Beta #1 14dpo - 72, Beta #2 17dpo 145 Beta 3 20dpo 521
    First u/s June 15 saw HB 126 bpm missed m/c 7/5/12 10 weeks D&C 7/6/12
    IVF#4 ER 9/30 ET 10/3 Beta 10/16 BFFN. IVF #5 final with o/e. ER 1/21 only 1 retrieved, hoping my lonestar is the one. Beta #1 2/6/13 = 209.... please let this be it! Keep growing lonestar! Beta #2 2/8/13 - 586! , Beta #3 2/10/13 = 1898. First u/s perfect little heart beat at 116 bpm. Measure 6 weeks 1 day. EDD 10/14/13
    3/4/13 measuring right on track beautiful heartbeat 171 bpm, graduated from RE to OB... bittersweet.
    PAIF/SAIF always welcome! Its a girl! 

    Maggie Grace is here!  10/5/13... 8lbs 6 ounces of pure joy!

    TTC#2  No birth control since DD was born.  Getting ready to jump back in the saddle.  Weaning this month. RE
    appt scheduled 5/8.   Here we go again!

    IFV# 6.  10/27  6 retrieved 4 mature 3 fertilized.  2 made it to 3dt 10/30. 1"very pretty 8 cell" and 1 6 cell.  Beta
    11/13.   Please stick embies!!!!  We love you so much already! 11/12/14  POAS, BFP... beta tomorrow!
    11/13 beta #1  924!!!  2nd bet 11/15 1906, one more on 11/17 3rd & final beta 3430.  First u/s 12/5, 7w4d, 2 heartbeats,
    both measuring right on track....2nd u/s... all is well... both beans measuring right on track... released from RE... first
    appointment with MFM 1/5.  Looks like this is really happening!

    image




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