Potty training. Help Please!

the_future_Mrs.Loggie · August 2012

Today is DD's first day of potty training. I am very discouraged to say the least! DD has been wanting to use the potty off and on now for the past couple of months. Once she went a whole day without wetting her diaper. We haven't really taken it seriously though until now because we were traveling a lot and I figured it would be easier for her to wait till we were home for a while. So we started today and went straight to panties. We haven't had much success. She had 2 pees when I asked her to and 8 accidents on the floor and furniture. She doesn't seem to care if I "throw away" her panties and has no shame at all in her accidents. I'm wondering if she really is ready or not. I don't want to push her if she's not. Anyone here have really bad days that lead to success??? Advice please!!!

jallen76 · August 2012

She has to be ready...it doesn't sound like she is interested if she doesn't care about the accidents. We never did underware at first...we did the Pull-Ups (it is just what worked for us.) They were like underware, the kids could pull them up and down and I didn't have to clean up the mess if there was an accident. If I remember correctly...the kids would always tell me when they had to go, then we would always run in there and go. They wanted to go. I may ask them after an hour or two if they hadn't gone themselves, but otherwise it was them in the drivers seat. It will happen quick when the child is ready.

the_future_Mrs.Loggie · August 2012

So DH comes home from work (computer tech with the school district), and I tell him how discouraged I am. Then we have a fight about him wanting her to go back to diapers because he's already stressed out with the start of school and doesn't need more stress with her potty training right now......um what?!.....I'm the one dealing with the messes and talking to her all day about it, he doesn't have a hand in it at all! And we had already discussed the fact that we thought she was ready, he just asked me a couple days ago what had happened cause he thought I was going to start......so.......she is now back in a diaper.........UGH DH!!!!

EveryNameIWantIsTaken · August 2012

Id wait. We had about three disastorous attempts before we wee successful. When we were successful he literally had 5 accidents the entire first month.

HarrietNJMommy · August 2012

She's 2. Sounds like she's not ready at all. If she doesn't care about accidents and doesn't care about panties, then she doesn't want to use the potty. You'll know when she's ready.

the_future_Mrs.Loggie · August 2012

The thing that gets me though is if we leave the potty in the living room where she can see it and she has her diaper on she will come to us when she has to pee and bring the potty with her. We didn't really do much for that, she did that part by herself. Because she does that so much I really though that this was going to be a breeze (HA!!!!). She will pee some in her diaper too, but some days it's rare. When the panties go on though she doesn't seem to care if she pees or not. I don't know what the difference is. Today is the first day.....maybe I just caught her on a bad day......I don't know....

HarrietNJMommy · August 2012

If you're willing, then give it another few days and see if she "gets" it. But she might not.

My kids all expressed interest around 18 months or so, but that didn't mean they were fully ready.

I'm a "lazy" potty training mom though. The ONLY kid I actually TRAINED was my DS because I WANTED him to go to camp this summer and he couldn't go if he wasn't. Otherwise, I just wait until my kids ask for underwear and they are in charge of their own "training". Takes about a day.

GL!

EveryNameIWantIsTaken · August 2012

HarrietNJMommy:
If you're willing, then give it another few days and see if she "gets" it. But she might not.
My kids all expressed interest around 18 months or so, but that didn't mean they were fully ready.
I'm a "lazy" potty training mom though. The ONLY kid I actually TRAINED was my DS because I WANTED him to go to camp this summer and he couldn't go if he wasn't. Otherwise, I just wait until my kids ask for underwear and they are in charge of their own "training". Takes about a day.
GL!

Agreed. DS showed interest early on too, but it would come and go and any attempts on my part just made him so not interested. We waited until he was totally ready, asking about it and such. I'm lazy about it too. The frustration just isn't worth it. Being able to go to "school" this year was great motivation for him.

kcisthebombdotcom · August 2012

My son was like this the first day. He couldn't have cared less about being wet and didn't get too much excitement over the "big boy" underwear.

The first day was probably as successful as your first day. The second day we had about 50/50 with accidents/catches and by the third day he only had 1 or 2 accidents. After the third day he didn't have another accident for a week and a half and rarely has them now. I might give it another day to see how she does tomorrow, but if she doesn't improve dramatically I would throw in the towel and try again in another 3 months.

the_future_Mrs.Loggie · August 2012

Thanks for your help ladies! I am going to try one more day just so I know for sure if she's ready or not. If it's a better day than great! If not a few more months of diapers is fine. I'm going to transition her to a big girl bed as well within the next week or so. I don't want too much change all at once so if this doesn't work tomorrow that'll be it for a while. thanks again :-)

Que*Syrah · August 2012

HarrietNJMommy:
If you're willing, then give it another few days and see if she "gets" it. But she might not.
My kids all expressed interest around 18 months or so, but that didn't mean they were fully ready.
I'm a "lazy" potty training mom though. The ONLY kid I actually TRAINED was my DS because I WANTED him to go to camp this summer and he couldn't go if he wasn't. Otherwise, I just wait until my kids ask for underwear and they are in charge of their own "training". Takes about a day.
GL!

Going that route, about how old were your kids when they asked?

ariel06 · August 2012

Maybe try something more gradual. With DS1 it worked to start out the morning in underwear. After three accidents for the morning we went back to diapers. I also would have a timer on and he'd have to try to go potty each time it went off.

HarrietNJMommy · August 2012

Que_Syrah:
HarrietNJMommy:
If you're willing, then give it another few days and see if she "gets" it. But she might not.
My kids all expressed interest around 18 months or so, but that didn't mean they were fully ready.
I'm a "lazy" potty training mom though. The ONLY kid I actually TRAINED was my DS because I WANTED him to go to camp this summer and he couldn't go if he wasn't. Otherwise, I just wait until my kids ask for underwear and they are in charge of their own "training". Takes about a day.
GL!
Going that route, about how old were your kids when they asked?

B was 3Y1M

E was 2.5

L - I "pushed" potty training in June when he was 3.5. He was ready, but it did take 1.5 weeks total for him. The girls only took a day.........much easier.

MesmrEwe · August 2012

I would really start to do things more gradual!!! Potty training is a HUGE concept for little kids.

Start with the pullups and sitting on the potty and going... Set a timer "when the timer dings, we'll go sit on the potty for 10 minutes"... Then when they do something in the potty, have a "potty party" (I know it's corny, but play the heck up out of there being any pee/poop action), but on the flip side make sad pouty faces and say how sad you are that they didn't get to the potty on time (play it up, don't make them feel ashamed, but play off the empathy sense that "It makes Mommy sad if I go in my diaper/pullups")... A sticker chart is another great thing to do since kids that age LOVE stickers! We had a "What do you do with a potty" pull book that we read with DD anytime she was on the potty and it worked great because it covered things like what a potty is for/what to do with it. I kid you not, we wore the book out but it was worth it.

I think we started around the 18mo mark (early, I know), but we were done during the day by the 26/28mo mark then a few months later we were done at night too. Not all kids are cut out to have the one day and done unless they're maybe four.. The panties also aren't really a good motivation until you're in the thick underware/rubber pants phase (and use the rubber pants, they'll save you a TON with the cleanups!)

HarrietNJMommy · August 2012

MesmrEwe:
I think we started around the 18mo mark (early, I know), but we were done during the day by the 26/28mo mark then a few months later we were done at night too. Not all kids are cut out to have the one day and done unless they're maybe four.. The panties also aren't really a good motivation until you're in the thick underware/rubber pants phase (and use the rubber pants, they'll save you a TON with the cleanups!)

That's not true. If you look at your timeline, it took you basically a year to potty train. If you had waited a year, you probably would have only taken a few days and not an entire year.

And they don't have to be 4 for you to train in 1 day. My DD#2 was trained in less than a day and she was 2.5. She was just ready.

If you have the time and energy and want to spend months and/or a year training your kid, by all means, do it.

Que*Syrah · August 2012

HarrietNJMommy:
Que_Syrah:
HarrietNJMommy:
If you're willing, then give it another few days and see if she "gets" it. But she might not.
My kids all expressed interest around 18 months or so, but that didn't mean they were fully ready.
I'm a "lazy" potty training mom though. The ONLY kid I actually TRAINED was my DS because I WANTED him to go to camp this summer and he couldn't go if he wasn't. Otherwise, I just wait until my kids ask for underwear and they are in charge of their own "training". Takes about a day.
GL!
Going that route, about how old were your kids when they asked?
B was 3Y1M
E was 2.5
L - I "pushed" potty training in June when he was 3.5. He was ready, but it did take 1.5 weeks total for him. The girls only took a day.........much easier.

Thanks!

Que*Syrah · August 2012

MesmrEwe:
I would really start to do things more gradual!!! Potty training is a HUGE concept for little kids.

Start with the pullups and sitting on the potty and going... Set a timer "when the timer dings, we'll go sit on the potty for 10 minutes"... Then when they do something in the potty, have a "potty party" (I know it's corny, but play the heck up out of there being any pee/poop action), but on the flip side make sad pouty faces and say how sad you are that they didn't get to the potty on time (play it up, don't make them feel ashamed, but play off the empathy sense that "It makes Mommy sad if I go in my diaper/pullups")... A sticker chart is another great thing to do since kids that age LOVE stickers! We had a "What do you do with a potty" pull book that we read with DD anytime she was on the potty and it worked great because it covered things like what a potty is for/what to do with it. I kid you not, we wore the book out but it was worth it.

I think we started around the 18mo mark (early, I know), but we were done during the day by the 26/28mo mark then a few months later we were done at night too. Not all kids are cut out to have the one day and done unless they're maybe four.. The panties also aren't really a good motivation until you're in the thick underware/rubber pants phase (and use the rubber pants, they'll save you a TON with the cleanups!)

Holy crap, you made your kid sit on the potty for 10 minutes straight?!

Andrewsgal · August 2012

HarrietNJMommy:
MesmrEwe:
I think we started around the 18mo mark (early, I know), but we were done during the day by the 26/28mo mark then a few months later we were done at night too. Not all kids are cut out to have the one day and done unless they're maybe four.. The panties also aren't really a good motivation until you're in the thick underware/rubber pants phase (and use the rubber pants, they'll save you a TON with the cleanups!)
That's not true. If you look at your timeline, it took you basically a year to potty train. If you had waited a year, you probably would have only taken a few days and not an entire year.
And they don't have to be 4 for you to train in 1 day. My DD#2 was trained in less than a day and she was 2.5. She was just ready.
If you have the time and energy and want to spend months and/or a year training your kid, by all means, do it.

Yep. WTH would you want to potty train a kid for a year? If you had waited the end result would have been the same with very little work on your part and stress on the kid.

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