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Babies: 0 - 3 Months
when did you feel a real connection?
My baby is six weeks now and I can't really say I feel a real connection. I am only 18 and I am kind of still sad rtersometimes about not having my old life of freedom with my friends and going out. I also didn't feel that sad about starting classes and being away from her for hours Monday Wednesday and Friday. I mean I wouldn't want to be without my daughter but I feel aweful. When will this get better and I will feel that strong bond? I feel like such a bad mom! I'm like getting really upset about it sometimes. Could I have pod and this is my problem with not feeling this strong loving bond? Please tell me I'm not the only one and this will get better.
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Re: when did you feel a real connection?
Hey!
I just wanted to say that what you are feeling is VERY normal!
I remember experiencing this with my first And thought something was wrong with me.
Now Since I've been there, I know with time that extreme loving bond will grow before you know it! And it is truely amazing!
It will happen I promise!
Just hang in there.
First don't beat yourself up and feel bad you're young and it'll probably take awhile for you to adjust. You're probably also dealing with wonky hormones. If you're really concerned about the possibility of having ppd talk to your doctor and stop by the postpartum depression board.
Every mother-child bond is different so it doesn't matter when we felt it. Eventually you will.
I'm only now feeling somewhat connected to DD, and she's almost 3 months old! In fact, I know of people who didn't truly feel like moms until the baby was 6 months old... For the longest time, I wished that I had a job to go back to (I recently graduated) because it seemed like being away from DD would actually improve my relationship.
I still wish I had a job and a different place to go to and different things to do now, but I do feel more connected with DD and more reluctant to leave her with someone else.
It'll happen eventually, but it's a huge change!
Don't feel bad, I had a pretty boring life too. My fiance works a lot and then I pretty much had one friend and she works full time and has an out of town boyfriend that she sees in her free time.
Its prefectly normal. Some fall immedite intense connection and some get it later. I loved me LO right away but it took me good 6 weeks or more to feel some intense connections to her. The first month especially and event second is hard. Your tired, trying to figure things out and its rough.
Your not a bad mom, its good to have some you time. It will come in time!
You are not a bad mom! What you are feeling is normal. You had a life before your baby came. While you love her and can't imagine not having her, you want to keep as much of the life you had before too. She should enhance your life. My DS is 9 weeks old and while I felt intense love right away, it took weeks for me to feel a real bond. The bond started getting really strong once I started getting more sleep, a lot of support from family and friends and started doing little things I enjoyed before he came. I know it will get even better when I go back to work and have him to look forward to coming home to.
Hang in there, you are doing great!