Two Under 2

When did your toddler meet new baby?

Hello Ladies!

I'm due next Tuesday and starting to think about the hospital. I have a 21 month old son and I'm trying to decide if I should have him brought to the hospital to meet his baby brother. I know being away from him for 3 days will be hard on me and him, I've been a SAHM since he was born and have never been away from him for more than 12 hours. 

So my question is, when did your LO meet the new baby, was it in the hospital or when you came home from the hospital? How did he react to the new baby?  

Re: When did your toddler meet new baby?

  • We did it a few hours after DD was born and I was in recovery.

    Worst idea ever. DS was freaked out because I looked like death and had no interest in the baby.

    If I could redo that moment, I would have had DS come in the hospital the day after DD was born and I was feeling better.

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  • DS met DD the day she was born.  Since I had a birth center birth, he met her when we came home.  He was fairly indifferent to DD, but that may be because he came home from my IL's w/ an ear infection.  He was also only 16.5 mos when DD was born so I think his reaction was age appropriate.  I will say next time I have a baby we are asking my IL's to keep the kids for 48 hours after the birth so I can recuperate sans toddlers climbing all over me.  HTH!

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  • My kids were always in the delivery room with me when I delivered, so they met/held the new baby within minutes.  It's not everyone's cup of tea, but it works for us.
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  • The baby was born at around 3am and my IL's came with my 20 month old to meet the baby late that morning. They just stayed for about an hour or so and then DH went out to lunch with them. The IL's then took DS home and DH came back to the hospital to stay with me.

    Overall it went well - he was more jealous when my MIL held the baby than when I did. He doesn't like sharing the baby with his grandparents (even now). Should be interesting in a few months when I go back to work and my MIL and mom trade off days watching both boys.

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  • DS was born at 3am and DD came with grandparents to meet the baby late that afternoon.  She wasn't too interested in the baby, but definitely wanted mommy.
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  • With all of my children, their sibling(s) have come to the hospital to visit.  My first two are 22 months apart, and my daughter came to visit her new brother at the hospital on the second day, I think.  She did great!

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  • DS2 was born late at night, so it worked out the next day for him to come in to meet him. I was like you and had never been away from him and being that I had a c/s I was going to be in the hospital for 4 days. Ds1 was 18 months old and he reacted ok, he was interested in the baby, but didn't want anything to do with me too much. The next couple of days it got better, they would come for lunch then go home for nap then come back for dinner, it was a nice and special time. The hospital was only 15 mins away.
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  • My 18 month old met his baby brother when I came home from the hospital.  I had DS2 in the wee hours of a Monday and was home Tuesday. 

    We did not make a big deal about the baby.  I came in and he greeted me with these GREAT BIG HANDS and dad followed in with the new baby in the carseat.  We let big brother notice the new baby on his own.  He was slightly interested, if memory serves, but it was a while back.

    I had zero interest in having DS1 visit in the hospital.  But, I was only there for a short period of time anyway.

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  • imageridesbuttons:

    My 18 month old met his baby brother when I came home from the hospital.  I had DS2 in the wee hours of a Monday and was home Tuesday. 

    We did not make a big deal about the baby.  I came in and he greeted me with these GREAT BIG HANDS and dad followed in with the new baby in the carseat.  We let big brother notice the new baby on his own.  He was slightly interested, if memory serves, but it was a while back.

    I had zero interest in having DS1 visit in the hospital.  But, I was only there for a short period of time anyway.

    This was us. I had DS around 3am anyways but that next morning I told my mom not to bring her. I just figured it would end in a tantrum, she wouldn't understand why I was there or who that new little person was, and at 16 months (turned 16 months the day I delivered) she would be interested in pushing all the buttons and playing with medical equipment....and when we would tell her no it would be a tantrum, or as we said goodbyes it would be a tantrum.

    I was released that evening (had very easy vag delivery) so she was only without DH and I less than 24 hours.  

    We came home and I showed her the carseat, she said Hi and ran off. She was too young to have any impact on her daily life. It wasn't until her brother could crawl and take her stuff that she had to adjust to him being around.  

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  • My mom brought DD (15 months) to the hospital the same day I delivered. I was worried she wouldnt want to leave with my mom but she did with no problem. She came in, said hi to the baby and then was more interested in the hospital bed remote. Overall, it was a great experience. 
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  • My youngest was born at about 3:30 am and my mom brought my oldest to the hospital late that morning.  My oldest was great with the baby, she didn't show much interest and didn't want to hold her or anything and we forced nothing, but she did want to see me.  That may be because we put her to bed and she woke up to my mom at the house though and she wasn't sure what was going on.  I wasn't comfortable carrying my oldest at that point (7 hours post delivery) but I did hold her on my lap sitting on the bed.  After she had been there for a while and seen baby and had mommy & daddy time my mom took her home.  We went home the next morning so that was the only time she came to the hospital.  We went to my parents to pick up our oldest though so we all came home together.

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  • I have not thought about this, but I was reading all the responses and for some reason started to tear up!  OMG! I better have it figured out before the end of February. Great post. Thanks!

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  • I posted back on this when I was first pregnant and loved reading the responses. I am going in tomorrow morning for a scheduled induction. DH and I are planning on having DS come see us in the hospital, obviously depending on the time of the delivery it might not happen RIGHT away. We want DS to be the first to meet his baby brother, and give us a few moments to bond. I know DS wont have much interest in his baby brother, and that's ok. I know I will want to see DS though!
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  • imageMammaBear81:
    My kids were always in the delivery room with me when I delivered, so they met/held the new baby within minutes.  It's not everyone's cup of tea, but it works for us.

    I'm planning a home birth and want DD around but my sister is afraid she'll be traumatized.  I hate to jack the thread but any advice you have would be greatly appreciated.  I'm a little worried DD might get upset but I don't think it will be quite the event my sister is envisioning.

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  • My second daughter was born at 10am and my older daughter came to the hospital about 2pm that afternoon.  She was wonderful with the baby!!  Very curious and so sweet too.  She visited the next day for a short while too.  Then she was at the door, waiting for us, when we arrived home.
  • DD2 was born at around 5:45PM. My parents were there waiting for me with DD1 when I was wheeled out of the delivery room (at 8PM).

    Yes, DD1 was a little freaked out, but she quickly became very curious about that little thing I was holding. 

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  • They met at the birth center about 2 hours after the birth.  We were VERY open to DS1 being at the birth, but the quick timing and intensity of the end of my labor just didn't work out for that. It was a really wonderful moment. DS1 was very excited to meet DS2, touch his hair, and watch him nurse. After 10 minutes, he was ready to play, which was fine. My parents took him out to do some fun things and then we were all home together by night time.

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