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July 2011 Moms
dairygirl19
member
Does anyone else like to go to work?
dairygirl19
member
I spent part of yesterday with a good college friend. She's a super sweet fun girl but she's very traditional, religious to a fault almost and her kids are her world to the extreme.
I made the comment in passing that I can't wait to go back to work on Wednesday. I loved having my break with Rubes when she born until Decemeber and then having all summer to farm more and be with LO. She pretty much lectured me on how by working I'm pretty much missing my kid's childhood, someone else is raising them, money doesn't matter and she could never do it. I esp. shouldn't be doing it becuase I can afford to stay home.
Thing is, I LIKE work. It gets me off the farm, I enjoy being out among people and applying my skills. It's also the easiest way to keep my license current. Rubes is also a busy, social child and LOVES her playmates and activities at datcare. It stimulates her and entertains her in a way I never could. She's in a great daycare a mile from my house. Staying at home isn't for me. I'm not an in the house person. Even home with Rubes I farmed all the time. We both love outside and being active.
I work less 3 days out of the week give or take. Daycare has her 2. H or my inlaws watch her the other. She's fostering such a great relationship there as well.
Also, at the risk of sounding selfish, I like my money too. I could stay home but my paycheck funds my cute clothes, pretty house, pedicure, girl's night out habits and sometimes a bit extra or the college fund. 
Of course those things don't matter in the end, but in the meantime I enjoy them and it saves my sanity.
Sorry for the rant, I'm just sitting here feeling a bit guilty over not do something that isn't me in the first place..lol.
So tell me your story to make me feel better.
And please don't take this as a rant against SAHMs. It's a tough tough job and one that needs respect, but I know it's not the best choice for me, kwim? I'm fully aware of to each their own.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Does anyone else like to go to work?
I work because I have to. But, I do enjoy what I do so that is a huge plus for me. I love when LO does something and DH and I are like, did you teach that to her? NO...did you?? The daycare she goes to is FANTASTIC. That is a big thing for me.
My DH works from home and has a really flexible schedule. We prefer that over having him work outside the home but for more money. He's able to stay with LO when she's sick and get his work done while she naps (which, when she's sick, is often....girl likes her sleep). I cannot work from home so this is important for us. I'd have to take PTO if I needed to stay home with a sick child. So, we are stretched really tight, and a 2nd LO might not be an option....but we are doing ok right now.
I think that the social aspect of having a child in daycare is top priority. She is learning SO MUCH. I could not do all that with her in one day. Water play? Imaginative play? They make bubbles, playdoh, paints - I would never think to do that!
Anyway. I would like to not HAVE to work. But even if we suddenly came into some money, I'd still work. At least part time. :-)
Me! If I could I would work pt because I find myself stressed sometimes working ft, and trying to "do it all' but I can't imagine not working at all.
I like the independence of my own income, and I enjoy going to work, having adult conversations, eating lunch in peace!, and that sort of thing.
TBH I have to work, so it's not like I have the choice anyway. But it's not like I go begrudgingly. And since my H works afternoons, LO stays home with Dad during the days. IMO it has helped establish a great bond between LO and H. And made things easier for me because H really gets what it's like to be home with LO all day. So he helps a ton with housework, babycare, etc.
Don't feel guilty about doing what makes you happy!
I love to work. I am a healthcare administrator. It is stressful and demanding. During the week I only get to see DD for about 2 hours in the evening before bedtime. I was able to stay home with her for 3 months and I loved it. I had a brief moment where I wanted to be a SAHM. Now that I have been back to work for 9 months, I can't imagine being a SAHM. I just don't think I could do it. I love the everyday challenge I face at work. Everyday is something new and different. Not that it wouldn't be if I was a stay at home mom, but in a different way. I am just not meant to stay home. I do have the flexibility to leave if I need to which is great and DH owns an IT company so he is pretty flexible.
DH and I have a great system so the house stays clean and we are super organized.
Even though I love my job, I wish I could do something different. I really want to open my own business.
Pregnant with Letrazole (Femara) on the first cycle with DD after TTC 2+ years
TTC#2 with Letrazole (Femara) since January 2012
BFP 06.29.12 EDD 03.11.13 natural m/c 07.13.12
BFP 09.22.12 EDD 05.31.13 natural m/c 10.07.12
CP 11.09.12
BFP 01.01.13 EDD 09.15.13 d&c 01.24.13
BFP 03.26.13 EDD 12.04.13
<a href="http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Pregnancy"><img src="http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tt1d0e64" alt=" Pregnancy Ticker" border="0" /></a>
I agree with you.
Pregnant with Letrazole (Femara) on the first cycle with DD after TTC 2+ years
TTC#2 with Letrazole (Femara) since January 2012
BFP 06.29.12 EDD 03.11.13 natural m/c 07.13.12
BFP 09.22.12 EDD 05.31.13 natural m/c 10.07.12
CP 11.09.12
BFP 01.01.13 EDD 09.15.13 d&c 01.24.13
BFP 03.26.13 EDD 12.04.13
<a href="http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Pregnancy"><img src="http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tt1d0e64" alt=" Pregnancy Ticker" border="0" /></a>
I like working. I'm a doctor, and it's extremely fulfilling. I'm so busy at work that I don't have very much time to miss DD. When I'm home, I do get sad when I realize how much I'm away from her.
DH stays with her, and sometimes I get jealous of the relationship they have, even though I still know she's a Mommy's girl.
But yes, overall I do like working. I've worked very hard to get where I am, and it's paid off. But I also enjoy vacations and days off.
Jess & Adam, married 2009, precious Audrey born in 2011. BFP 1/6/13, 6-wk MMC discovered at 9 wks 2/11/13. D&C 2/18/13, second D&C 4/23/13 for retained placenta.
BFP 8/24/13!! EDD 5/1/14, delivered healthy and sweet Zoey Leanne on 5/5/14 by repeat c-section.
Honestly, I don't like working. I would quit in a heartbeat if I could and be a SAHM. That being said, since I do have to work, I do enjoy being a nurse. I couldn't imagine any other career for myself.
Even though I enjoy being home with LO all day (since I work overnight shifts), I really think that he would benefit from the daycare experience. If financially possible next spring (when I go back to work after LO#2), I will hopefully place him in daycare part-time for his benefit.
I'm having trouble finding a job though. I'm a nurse though so no matter what job I find i'll be working weird shifts (potentially night shifts
Our family blog
This. Working makes me feel better, it pays the mortgage (DH is in school, but I'll always be the bread winner...no big deal, he says that he is my "trophy husband"), and K LOVES daycare. She actually started waving goodbye to me before I was done talking to her teachers.
I would go insane at home with her. I sometimes look forward to Mondays as much as Fridays. I have all the respect in the world for SAHMs. K is at an in-home daycare with a retired couple. She was a SAHM and daycare provider for 40 years. Without people like her and her husband, I would not be able to work. I am so thankful that we live in a society where you can work where you have the best skill set. I work in an office because that is what I am good at, and others work at home because that is what they are good at.
DITTO what most everyone else says. Your friend may be a better mom than me but I am a better working mom than a SAHM.
I would be biting his head off because he is so needy and I can't be with him all day. I love going to school now and would love to start working soon.
Oh and I am pretty religious too and I have friends like this. I just think that they probably make better SAHMs than working moms.
Plus what will I do once he starts going to school? bake cookies everyday? I think my waistline will not forgive me.
Bahaha! The whole thing is I'm just as religious as she is..I just have a different perspective. And I totally hear you on the biting head off thing...I love Rubes and I love my child but she needs to be occupied and busy in a way I can't give her. I wouldn't normally care at all about the religioous thing but she touts Bible verses as her affirmation to her choices..it's annoying.
Also, I work too, so I have something to do when she does go to school. I don't want my skill set gone.
Thanks girls. I feel much better today!
I think a good mom is a happy mom and if mom is happy working then that is what she should do. I was the child of a working mom, so I never thought twice about it. I love my current job and I am excited to see where my career takes me. DD loves her daycare and I wouldn't change it for the world. Do I wish my busy time didn't make me late in the evenings some nights, of course. But it is only 90 days and I like that she gets alone time with DH a couple nights a week.
As H often points out, in this day in age it is a luxury for a parent to be a SAHP so those who judge b/c both parents work often forget that it isn't a choice for many families.
All of this! It is what it is. I agree with Five_Letters, being a working mom makes me a better mom, AND I miss her something fierce while I am at work and hate leaving in the morning and seeing her upset to see me go.
I am glad that my DH can be a SAHD though but I do find myself thinking more and more that going to a daycare where she'll be able to socialize with other kids her age could be really good for her.
We are pretty religious too. All the moms I know IRL are all SAHM's, I am the only working mom, and sometimes I feel judged but none have ever and I do not think they would ever say anything to me like that. Not cool IMO.
However, it does make said socializing with other kids her age hard. We do play dates when I can but often they are during the week and while I am at work. So with me working I can rarely go. So, I am considering doing a 1-2 day a week daycare arrangement (not sure if my tight budget could afford it) or just waiting and enrolling her as soon as I can in pre-school.