2nd Trimester

Am I alone in this self-conscious feeling?

I know that I'm gaining weight for the baby, etc. I'm not complaining or whining about that.

However, I don't hear alot of you saying that you feel dumpy. I do. Well, not dumpy, just different. I feel like the boobs are starting to point south and I'm uncomfortable when DH is staring at my bare belly, even though he loves it. I just turned down a romantic shower because I am too self-conscious.

Am I the only one on this?
 

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Re: Am I alone in this self-conscious feeling?

  • I have my off days. ?Especially during this last week when I haven't been able to wear a bra (cracked a rib right where the band and shoulder strap meet. ?Hurts like a beetch and I can't breathe). ?I think it would be impossible not to feel dumpy and ugly when you are feeling gross, are constantly uncomfortable and heavy. ?You are not alone!
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  • Just started feeling this way a few weeks ago. ?I put my clothes on very fast now in front of DH. ?I feel like my ass is getting large, my nipples are the size of sausages, and my boobs are sagging. ?I don't mind my weight gain but I do wish I could feel sexy again.
  • right here! I have outgrown my cute boyshort cruisers and im not wearing the undies i had bought for basic training, they are huge but are fitting snug. ugh. my lady lumps are, well...blach.

    i miss my body!

    P.S. IS THAT ENOUGH INFO FOR YOU, MAN LURKER?!?!?!

  • I feel dumpy for sure! My clothes are either to big or to small and I've gained weight in my face, booty and thighs. Ah the joy of being pregnant Stick out tongue
  • I felt gross when I was just expanding sideways and gaining weight with no baby bump. Now that I have a bump going I feel better. I am sure that the dumpy feeling will come back. It's hard to accept our changing bodies sometimes. You're certainly not alone!
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  • I feel very unattactive these days. My skin is gross and I can't see my feet.
  • im with you. i just have felt overall less sexy, less attractive, and just dont have the self esteem i had before pg (having 4 months of horrendous m/s doesn't help).?

    i went shopping for a holiday cocktail type dress to wear to holiday parties the other day, and i found the *perfect* dress and told the sales lady 'this is the first time i have felt pretty my entire pregnancy.'

    ?

  • I thought that I would have a very difficult time being pregnant with the weight gain, I've always hated my stomach.  But I actually feel better about my looks these days. 

    I think it may be that I've given up control of my body - because in reality, I have mean acne, a weird itchy rash that is slowly spreading over my body and I weigh more then I ever have but I have. 

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  • Agreed with pp, I definitely have my days where I feel so unattractive and chubby- everything I put on, maternity or otherwise, just makes me look fat not pg and my boobs look like something out of National Geographic.  But DH always makes me feel better- he tells me I look beautiful daily and that I am glowing, and I know he means it.  ***awww***  The farther along I get, the more accepting of the changes in my appearance I have become.  Its all worth it, and it all ties in to the idea that its not all about me anymore.
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  • There's definitely days were I have hard time with the weight, especially since I just lost more than 30 lbs. I have a bump, but in some things I still don't look pregnant and that bothers me. DH -- as sweet as he is -- also thinks that "making light of it" will help me. But, needless to say when he called me tubby this morning I was not ?happy camper.
  • I'm having an exptremely hard time with my body the last few weeks... I have now grown out of my regular pants and they dont' make maternity pants small enough to fit me so they're all baggy and saggy and make my ass look gigantic and they're all puffy in the front.... as if that's not bad enough I ahve like 3 shirts that I can wear now that actually cover the uggo top of the mat pants.  I just feel completely dumpy and fat and unattractive.  I've also been struggling with a new outbreak of acne as of late and .... well I guess i don't really need to go on... you ladies all already know.

    I just can't wait until I actually look pregnant and things somewhat fit.

  • I definitely feel dumpy!!! I had the hardest time picking out an outfit today.  I felt like everything was getting tighter...
  • I feel sooo huge!  I do not feel attractive at all!  I am growing out of all of my small/med maternity clothes.  My hubby is starting to get freaked out when we are trying... I try to have ther belly covered at all times.
  • Your not alone - I feel gross naked.  I have never been one to HAVE to have the lights off when fooling around but now its either with the lights off or not at all, i just dont feel like showing off.
  • Uh oh.. I'm in trouble! LoL I'm already feeling like that at 16wks. :(
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  • I'm terrible...I feel sorry for DH...for the past few weeks...lights on is not an option, I make him leave the room when I get dressed in the mornings and he has stopped asking about taking showers together.  I feel like I'm going to be like this forever...I feel like I'll never be normal again.
  • You are not alone.

    I have always had self-esteem issues so this stage is hard for me b/c I feel like my body is growing out of control. I've gained 10 lbs already at 20 weeks (bump + face + behind). I sent out some belly pics to family and close friends and all they've said is .... oh you're getting fat etc.

    What I try to tell myself is that I'm gaining weight to help my precious baby grow. Also, I am going to borrow this book from the library https://www.lucypuryear.com/understanding_your_moods.htm

    Hope this helps! 

  • Thank you for posting this.  I never post here, just lurk.  But I came on tonight hoping someone would admit they feel as awful about themselves as I do.  You are definitely not alone.  I hate crying every morning when I try to get dressed and nothing fits, or if it does it doesn't fit right.  I have always had low self esteem, and these past 6 weeks it has been ground into less than nothing. 

    I try to tell myself that its not about me, and how I feel I look, that this is what has to happen to help the baby grow.  But staring down 16 extra pounds at 22 weeks and knowing I will add at least another 16 before its all said and done is NOT easy for me.  I wish I could make peace with my body like it seems so many of the other ladies around here have, but I just don't seeem to know how to do it.  

  • Nope. And as more strange things keep happening to my body (mysterious, hideous, red blotchy bumps appearing on my legs, swollen ankles, puffed out varicose vein) I feel more and more dumpy every day.

     Dh is great about it, but the way I see it, is that this is such a small piece of time in the scheme of things. I can deal as long as I know it's temporary! Well, I may need surgery  on the vein, but the rest should go away :)

  • I agree, I am not very far along but I feel the same way...I have spent my whole life concerned with being thin and pretty an now I am terrified of getting fat and not looking cute and pregnant.
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  • Definatly not. I was overweight before I got pregnant, but I did pop out a little in the past week. Regular clothes are uncomfortable and tight I had to give those up, but maternity feels baggy and like I'm trying to cover up weight gain instead of showing off a bump.

    Also I can't find a comfortable bra. At 9 weeks I ripped the underwires out of my bra I was so aggravated. I can still wear them, but I feel so droopy without it. I think I'm going to take someone's advice and try a maternity type sports bra.

    Hang in there, it is worth it.

     

  • I am very self-conscious too. Some days I feel cuter and more pregnant than others, some days, I just feel dumpy and fat. Today is a dumpy and fat day (bad outfit choice but I was trying to branch out of the things I always wear!) Sad

    The weight gain freaks me out, I didn't gain that much and then bam, big weight gain at my last appointment. I know its for the baby though but its still difficult to get used to it!


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  • All I like are sweat pants! (I tried to go bowling a few weeks ago, in maternity pants, and left in tears because there were two skinnnnnny girls bowling next to me, which made me feel too big and ugly!)...  Then I feel  baby kicking about, and it makes feeling ugly totally worth it! 
  • I'm glad I'm not the only one. Yes, I feel very unattractive. My boobs are HUGE (and not in a good way), I've gained weight in my butt and thighs, and I just look frumpy in anything I wear.  I hate looking at my self in the mirror most days.  I'm trying to focus on what I will do to look wonderful again after I have the baby since there isn't much I can do about this now.
  • I am 23 weeks pregnant and have gained 27 lbs.  My doc is not concerned at all-- I'm 5'10 and was a rail before pregnancy, so maybe that is why.  My diet has been extremely healthy, as all I am craving is fruit, fruit, fruit.  What has helped me is wearing clothes with empire waists and styles that enhance my pregnant belly.  I feel the worst when I'm wearing 'big' t-shirts, and things that just make me look fat, not pregnant.  I can't wait for my belly to 'pop' some more....

  • I have my off days as well but even when I think DH is crazy for  thinking I look adorable when I'm starting waddle or do my 'penguin walk' he helps to make me feel good about myself when he still thinks I look hot pregnant haha.

     I usually don't think about it most often because I'm more concerned about making sure that my baby is growing healthy but I do understand seeing your boobs going south and all that! Don't  worry you're not alone. Its nice to know that everyone is feeling this way and that we'll all get through itSmile

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