Meeting with my boss

crene84 · August 2012

I've been struggling with how to handle work and adoption. The plan has always been to be a SAHM once our baby arrives, but with all the uncertainties of adoption, I wasn't sure how best to prepare my company for this. I don't want them to know that I am planning on quitting and replace me before I'm ready to leave, nor do I want to not say anything and leave them high and dry when my baby arrives. My boss ended up scheduling my mid-year review for today so I was preparing what I was going to say. I think it went really well. I explained that I haven't made any decisions yet but at the very least would be gone for 3 months maternity leave and suggested that I start training someone on my job soon in case it's a last minute situation. He was very supportive and agreed. He also thanked me for the "heads up." So, I feel pretty good about it. Smile

Art Teacher · August 2012

Glad it went so well! It's very stressful waiting to have that conversation, isn't it???

so1966 · August 2012

good to hear the convo went well!!!! and good for you for being open and honest. i'm sure it's appreciated by your employer!

summergirl79 · August 2012

YAY! Glad it went well, work and adoption timing is tricky!

ellekae · August 2012

Phew! So pleased for you that it went well; that would totally stress me out too!

LAD111707 · August 2012

Glad it went so well!

I had the same talk with my boss and it went well. Unfortunately, once our son was born and I was a week into my leave my boss sent me an email telling me I had to return at the six week mark and that the decision wasn't up to me. He went so far as to have my temporary replacement contact our HR company and find out about FMLA. He found out the company wasn't eligible for FMLA as they didn't have enough employees. He then told me I had to sign a paper agreeing to return on a certain date. I received the email on my phone while visiting our son in the NICU. I was furious and hurt that he seemed so supportive during the adoption process but once it got down to it he could have cared less.

My DH and I decided for me to quit - the stress, work load and the low pay wasn't worth missing time with our son.

I do hope things go better for you!

Dr.Loretta · August 2012

Sweet!

I handled the whole leave thing rather unconventionally, but I thought I'd share. I got a full 12 weeks FMLA with partial pay for at least half due to state regs (yay). I fully intended to SAH, but realized that the end of my ML coincided with my boss going out on 2 weeks paternity leave, and that would cut our dept in half. I called him 4 weeks before my leave was up and told him I'd come in for a month to help out FT, then I would quit to SAH. He was so happy with the arrangement he offered to call me if they needed freelancing help. 2 years later and I'm still working for them on occasion. It was awesome how well it worked out. He actually cried when he heard I could come back for a short time.

crene84 · August 2012

LAD111707:
Glad it went so well!

I had the same talk with my boss and it went well. Unfortunately, once our son was born and I was a week into my leave my boss sent me an email telling me I had to return at the six week mark and that the decision wasn't up to me. He went so far as to have my temporary replacement contact our HR company and find out about FMLA. He found out the company wasn't eligible for FMLA as they didn't have enough employees. He then told me I had to sign a paper agreeing to return on a certain date. I received the email on my phone while visiting our son in the NICU. I was furious and hurt that he seemed so supportive during the adoption process but once it got down to it he could have cared less.

My DH and I decided for me to quit - the stress, work load and the low pay wasn't worth missing time with our son.

I do hope things go better for you!

Wow! I'm sorry your situation was so bad. After the initial excitement of it going better than expected wore off, I did start to worry that once he talks to the "big" boss about it, what if they decide that it'd be easier to just let me go. I know my immediate boss would never, but I'm not sure about the higher ups. And I realize that there some areas where I could possibly sue but I would definitely never want to have to worry about that!