S+TM's question about LO visiting

ryeleeandrori · August 2012

As the time gets closer and closer that I will be having this baby, I'm getting so worried about how emotional I will be leaving DS1. We don't leave DS1 very often, only when we actually need to, so I am sad to be away from him. He will be with my parents and I know he will be fine, but thinking about him being brought to the hospital to see me and the new baby brings tears to my eyes. The thought of him having to leave after visiting hours makes me cry even harder. I'm having a really hard time with thinking about it at all. So for those who have been through it, is it as hard as I am making it out to be? Is there anything I can do to make being away easier on me? I really don't think DS1 is going to have any problems being away from me, or leaving after visiting us at the hospital. This is really just my problem. Stupid pregnancy hormones! Help me realize it won't be that bad. Sorry for the long rambling paragraph, on my phone.

nopegoat · August 2012

I'm not going to lie. It was hard and I totally broke down twice. Once when he first left and again when I got up to go to the bathroom and found one of his cars he left.

I had my DS2 stay in my room to distract me. I kept telling him about his big brother and comparing how much they looked alike.

When my DF brought DS1 back up the next day I had saved my dessert for him and had him climb in bed with me and just snuggled and snuggled and talked about little brother while my DF had DS2.

Just try and remember its only for a day or so and you will be back home with both your LO's! Good luck Momma!

ryeleeandrori · August 2012

kdm06c:
I'm not going to lie. It was hard and I totally broke down twice. Once when he first left and again when I got up to go to the bathroom and found one of his cars he left.
I had my DS2 stay in my room to distract me. I kept telling him about his big brother and comparing how much they looked alike.
When my DF brought DS1 back up the next day I had saved my dessert for him and had him climb in bed with me and just snuggled and snuggled and talked about little brother while my DF had DS2.
Just try and remember its only for a day or so and you will be back home with both your LO's! Good luck Momma!

Thanks. I know I have to focus on the fact that it will be a short amount of time!

ilovelife · August 2012

This has been my biggest fear since getting this bfp. I'm having a rcs so it'll be at least a 2 night stay. The plan is for my mom to take care of ds the night before, then mil the night of. The next night or two dh will bring him home to sleep. I'm really nervous about trying to entertain a toddler while at the hospital.

nopegoat · August 2012

ilovelife, DS1 did pretty good. We packed lots of toys (bought him a few new cars to really get his attention), movies, and snacks. There were only a few times where he started to get ancy and my DF took him out for a little walk for a change of scenery and he was good.

mamahawk12 · August 2012

kdm06c:
I'm not going to lie. It was hard and I totally broke down twice. Once when he first left and again when I got up to go to the bathroom and found one of his cars he left.
I had my DS2 stay in my room to distract me. I kept telling him about his big brother and comparing how much they looked alike.
When my DF brought DS1 back up the next day I had saved my dessert for him and had him climb in bed with me and just snuggled and snuggled and talked about little brother while my DF had DS2.
Just try and remember its only for a day or so and you will be back home with both your LO's! Good luck Momma!

Ughhhh I just teared up reading this - sooo not looking forward to leaving DS. Having him in the delivery room would be completely inappropriate... right? (haha, totally kidding.... maybe). I'm gonna be a wreck when he comes to visit for the first time - I can't even think about it without getting a pit in my stomach.

ryeleeandrori · August 2012

I feel a little better knowing that I'm not going to be the only one who is going to be a complete mess because of this!

klp28 · August 2012

I had a really tough time leaving DD and I was a mess after she went home the first might. I agree with the pp that having DS in the room kept my mind off of it mostly. It didn't help when my mom told me DD was laying in her crib at night saying "mama" (though I'm sure my mom was trying to be helpful). Fortunately it was only 2 nights.

nopegoat · August 2012

meaknigh:
kdm06c:
Ughhhh I just teared up reading this - sooo not looking forward to leaving DS. Having him in the delivery room would be completely inappropriate... right? (haha, totally kidding.... maybe). I'm gonna be a wreck when he comes to visit for the first time - I can't even think about it without getting a pit in my stomach.

Haha! Mathieu saw Rhett being born.. well kind of. My DF walked in with him when they were pulling him out since my MIL bailed on us. It didn't seem to bothwe him too much lol!

noah-bear · August 2012

I cried many times at the thought of leaving him. About 2 weeks before I had DS2 the plan was switched up to where DS1 was going to stay with a friend instead of DH. That killed me. I had never been away overnight, he had never been watched by anyone and he hadnt slept away from his bed in over 2 years.

When it came time, he was so excited to go stay with her and she had him call at night and sent me updates. It went well, and while I mssed him terribly, my partly induced labor that had 3.5 hrs of pushing and a csection left me too exhausted and I was focused on DS2 a ton

stephmaui · August 2012

I rarely bump but am so sympathetic to this I had to share our experience. I am a SAHM and ds1 has never been left with anyone other than hubby. I had major anxiety about labor and hospital stay. Ds1 is 20 months. We got very lucky with the timing of my labor and dh was able to leave the hospital to put ds down to sleep. We had friends stay over that ds is comfortable with. To my shock, he woke and went back to sleep when our friend snuggled in with him. About two hours after ds2 was born dh left the hospital and went home to spend time with ds1. He was in good profits when he got there and didn't seem to miss me too much. They came in the afternoon for a visit and I snuggled ds as much as possible. I completely lost it when they left for the night. Luckily you do have an adorable little distraction to get you through. The next day hubby and ds1 came for two visits and ds 1 was a bit emotional when leaving the room but settled quickly. Ds and dh now have a bond stronger than ever. It is very cute and helping me get through these first few days while ds2 is attatched to me and I am still missing quality time with ds1. However, the transition is happening a million times better and easier than I ever dreamed. Good luck!

byrne15 · August 2012

I know I'm going to miss ds. I mean, he is 4.5 years old and DH and I work oppositie shifts...so DS and I spend a lot of time together.

My parents are going to have ds, but if I am doing well physically at the hospital.... I might send DH home for a while to be with ds. It will make me feel better since ds loves dh and I know he will want to see him or me.

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