what would you do? Need Advice

kwilson158 · August 2012

Next friday I will be going for my 2nd ultra sound and next saturday we are having my son's 4th birthday party....I originally planned to buy him a t-shirt that said "Big Brother's Rock" and wrap it and have him open it as the last gift at his party and let that be our announcement of our expecting baby....(all of this happening depending on how my appointment went friday ofcourse)

Anyway...I suggested it to a friend and she said I should do what I wanted to do but she thought it was a bad idea because it was my childs birthday party and even though he wouldnt' remember us doing it she thought everybody would then forget while they were there and focus on me instead...??? I totally get her point and have thought about it? before she told me this last night I told her I didn't buy the shirt...That I could't bring myself to do it because I was scared something would go wrong... eeekkk pgal brain....

Anyway....My son will not actually turn 4 until the 28th so I thought maybe I could wait and just send Thank You cards to everyone in attendance and send a picture of my child holding the ultrasound pic. instead?

I don't know how long I can hold it in anymore...I feel like it might get out before we are ready to announce and I just want to make sure when it does get out WE are the ones doing it???

Sorry to ramble...Just hoping someone can shed some light on this for me...

prplscrubs · August 2012

I love the idea of your son opening the shirt. If you do it as the last present, then all the focus has been on your son for the day. Its a gathering so that you are able to tell everyone at one time. IMO I don't like the sending out thank you cards idea.

Remember it's your news to share and you should share it as you wish!! Regardless of what others think Wink

green0501 · August 2012

I think it's a great idea!

Whatever+Ever · August 2012

I think the idea is fine. Whether or not you steal the spotlight from your child will depend entirely upon how you behave. If you make it about your son being a big brother, it'll spread any additional attention to him as well. You'd have to really TRY to overshadow a four year-old on his birthday.

And these announcements are usually pretty simple, right?

Every time I've told someone, it's like "Oh yay! How are you feeling? When are you due? I'm really happy for you! Okay, back to what we were doing before..."

aimeecasey · August 2012

I think the present idea is great! He's four. He's going to be running around and not caring what everyone else is doing about 5 minutes after opening the present anyway. If it were an older child or someone's else's shower or special event- absolutely not.

ChloBub · August 2012

I agree with PP - I think your idea is great.

MizMess · August 2012

My perspective on this is a little different... as an older child, I have to say that while it's a super cute idea, I would err on the side of caution and keep his birthday about him. This new baby will get alllllll the attention from others once he/she is here, and it's a rough adjustment for the older sib. If you do decide to do it, I would just make absolutely sure you keep it about him being a big brother.

mollyj931 · August 2012

I love the idea. I usually see kids birthday parties as more family/ friend get togethers anyway, so it would be a great time if all the people you want to tell are there. Because the shirt is for him, it still puts the attention on the birthday boy. I like that idea better than the thank you card.

avy930 · August 2012

I think it's a cute idea! It sounds as if it he would be opening the present towards the end of the party anyway so he will have the entire party about him before the announcement. If you had planned to put DS in a big brother shirt for the whole party, I would say that takes away from his day but I think this is a cute, small way to let DS make the announcement.

I don't really like the u/s pic in the thank you cards...it just doesn't seem to have a connection.

kwilson158 · August 2012

Thanks ladies...your thoughts have been really helpful...I want the entire day to be about my son and since All my very close friends and family will be there I thought it would be the perfect way to announce...Like I said earlier in my post it will all depend on how my appointment goes friday...it all makes me nervouse thinking about it...

I will keep you all posted on how it goes... Thanks again...

BarefootContess · August 2012

I agree with your friend and would not announce at the party. I was three when my sister was born and have clear memories from that point onward, so he may or may not remember it. I also think it is setting yourself up for jealousy issues in advance. I would allow your son to have his special day and just let people know at a later time. The new baby will get plenty of attention when he/she is born.

CougFan · August 2012

Do you know what his reaction will be like? How will he do getting this big, life changing news and exciting news while every one else is cheering. That could be overwhelming.

Our son was 5 when we told him and he was the first to know. It was a special moment for the tbree of us that I still remember.

guilletskichuk · August 2012

avy930:
I think it's a cute idea! It sounds as if it he would be opening the present towards the end of the party anyway so he will have the entire party about him before the announcement. If you had planned to put DS in a big brother shirt for the whole party, I would say that takes away from his day but I think this is a cute, small way to let DS make the announcement.

I don't really like the u/s pic in the thank you cards...it just doesn't seem to have a connection.

All of this.

lkm2006 · August 2012

I know I'm in the minority (I'm guilty of over thinking things) but I wouldn't do it at the party.

We originally were going to try for #2 later in the summer and tossed the idea of announcing at DS's birthday. Now, he is turning1 so he would have absolutely no idea but I hated the idea. It's his special day (even if it's not his actual birthday) and the new baby will get plenty of special days and attention, I did not want it to turn into about the new baby at his party.

I clearly remember my 4th birthday and I think a 4 year old is too capable to understanding, getting jealous, possibly resenting this new baby.. Not worth it IMO. Like I said, I can totally over think though!

CCBelATC · August 2012

FWIW, I disagree with your friend, and love the idea of your son opening the "big brother" shirt! I think it's a great idea on your part!

Artzichick · August 2012

I think it is a really cute idea and a great way to tell everyone at once. I agree that if it was a wedding or other adult thing, not a good idea. But I think this is totally fine.

jgoetz1 · August 2012

I say that you should ignore what your friend and everyone on here tells you to do. If you want to announce it at your son's birthday party, I say go for it. Everyone will be with you in person to celebrate the good news.

gravytrain225 · August 2012

jessuhmarie:
I wouldn't do it on my kid's birthday. Do you really need some big crazy announcement? Just tell people before or after.

Took the words out of my mouth. If I received a bday thank you card with an ultrasound picture in it, my eyes would be rolling.

kewltif · August 2012

I like the idea! It's your own son's party. It's not like you're doing this at someone else's birthday party.

Want a personalized experience?

what would you do? Need Advice

Re: what would you do? Need Advice

Choose Another Board

Search Boards