FTM planning to labor at home as long as possible...

EmilyT2388 · August 2012

I have read and tried to educate myself as best as I can about natural childbirth and how to make this possible in the hospital. I understand that it's best to labor at home as long as I can, and I would love to just go in and be ready to push!! But realistically, I am worried that it may be more intense than I can imagine and I end up going too early! How can I keep myself from going in too soon despite the intense feeling? They say you just know when it's time but I'm scared I'll be a wuss and feel like I'm ripping apart at 2cm or something!!

KateLouise · August 2012

To me it's like how you know when it's time to go the Dr when you're sick or injured (not suggesting that labour is an illness) it's just if you are sick or injured, you go through some basic checks.

You think through how you feel, what you can do at home to ease the discomfort, you think through if the Dr is simply likely to send you home and tell you to get some rest. You try out different things to get rest and stay comfortable, and as those things start to no longer work, you start to think that maybe this is "serious"

So my experience of labour was the same. "Oh that was a twinge." "Oh hang on these twinges are getting regular" "Hmm twinges are getting more intense, should probably time them." "I'm gonna see if I can go to sleep" "This is pretty painful, gonna check in with my MW" "will try the the shower...this is lovely" "Shower was lovely but now it's only helping a little" "Could probably cope longer at home, but we have a 40 minute drive."(The distance obviously plays a big part in your decision)

There's no harm in going early. Remember you can always leave to go home or for a walk around the block or whatever.

I know it's not very useful advice, but you will know when you need to go. I'll be surprised if you're struggling to cope at 2cm, but if you are then that's probably something that should be checked out anyway.

Trust your gut, and your knowledge of your body.

ETA: DD1 I arrived at the hospital at 5cm, and she was born 4 hours later.

mjbaby · August 2012

We took a natural birthing class and our midwife told us not to go in until the contractions were about 3 minutes apart. By that time, I could handle them pretty well - they were kind of uncomfortable, but tolerable. When I got to the hospital, I was already 7cm (had been 5cm the week leading up to it w/no contractions up to that point). I think if you have a birth plan and the drs/nurses know that you don't want intervention, you should feel comfortable going there early w/out feeling like you're going to be strapped to the bed. Also - a tub is a wonderful thing...just sayin'

drpayne · August 2012

They'll give you timing guidelines to go by as far as contraction duration and spacing. There are iPhone apps that are helping in keeping track. Go by those guidelines. I heard over and over about the slow build up in labor and was prepared to labor at home for a long time. I went from not being in labor to 7 cm in two hours so it can vary a ton. Good luck!

tokenhoser · August 2012

https://bellyupbaby.blogspot.ca/2011/07/is-it-time-to-go-to-hospital.html

That was really true for me. The emotional signposts were more useful than timing contractions. When I got quiet and focused (as opposed to conversing and joking between contractions), it was time to go. I arrived, my water broke as I was changing into the gown, and then I was 10 cm when assessed. Perfect.

Temp76535187505890 · August 2012

tokenhoser:
https://bellyupbaby.blogspot.ca/2011/07/is-it-time-to-go-to-hospital.html
That was really true for me. The emotional signposts were more useful than timing contractions. When I got quiet and focused (as opposed to conversing and joking between contractions), it was time to go. I arrived, my water broke as I was changing into the gown, and then I was 10 cm when assessed. Perfect.

I agree wholeheartedly. The emotional signposts (and the physical ones beyond the contractions) were much more helpful in determining when we should leave than the contractions alone. I arrived and was checked at 7cm but my daughter was born within 11 minutes of walking in the door.

KateLouise · August 2012

i definitely agree . i ignored them with dd2 and had a baby on my bathroom floor.

perplexed59 · August 2012

Try to listen to your body. When you don't think you can handle it anymore or you feel like it may be time, listen and act on it. Worst case you get sent home but if you are aware of the stages of labour you will probably have an idea of where you are. I started in active labour (1 min long 30 secs between) and was freaking out that I couldn't do this for hours and hours. Everyone always says ftm's are in labour for a very long time. I called and made my midwives come early and when they arrived I was 8cm. They were only there for 2 hours before my baby was born.

LiebeMama · August 2012

They will give you timing guidelines, but for me, my initial plan was to labor at home as long as possible. THIS did not work. My water had broken, so I took a shower, straightened my hair, put on makeup, then left for the hospital two hours later. I was a 1/2 a cm when I arrived. LAME! At 2 cm, I was screaming my head off for an epidural. I finally got one because I was in so much pain. I still wish I would have toughed it out longer at home.

BLPL101 · August 2012

I want to labor at home as long as possible and when I told my mom she said she is worried that I'll have the baby in the car. Every single woman in my family (grandma, aunts, mom, cousins) all had VERY short labors.

jwurnig · August 2012

Our natural birthing coach said if you can still smile for pictures or chat logically with DH, you should probably stay home. But, once you turn that corner and smiling and looking 'pretty' are the last things on your mind, it's time to go. I totally agree! I labored at home and even timed my own contractions while DH slept. Once it got to the point where I had to wake him up because I couldn't focus on recording the contractions in my notebook Smile

, I knew I was getting close. I was more focused on the length of my contractions instead of the time in between. I was waiting for 5-1-1 (five minutes apart, lasting 1 minute for 1 hour) My contractions were never longer than 50 seconds but they were 2 minutes apart when we left for the hospital. My water broke 1 minute after walking into the delivery room and I was 9 cm when they checked me. DD was born less than an hour after arrival! You'll know when it's time. Good luck!

panda10 · August 2012

I planned on laboring as long as possible at home too. I labored for 11 hours at home. I ended up getting to the point where I was so anxious about being at home, that I cried whenever I was by the nursery or I saw my dog.

We went in, I told them I wanted to have a natural birth, they spent about 15 minutes getting started on their paperwork, vitals, and then I labored for 3 hours in the whirlpool tub and decided that it was the best decision that I made.

Don't stress about it too much. You'll make the right decision.

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