Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
KorieAngela
member
Re: Vitamin K & Circumcision? 8th Day Circumcision?
What about oral vitamin K? Is it the shot or is it the vitamin K?
This is a strange board to be posting about circumcision. You have to realize that almost everyone on an AP board is going to be pretty horrified at the notion.
My hospital doesn't do oral Vitamin K...and I thought this would be the proper board since I am asking about not getting the Vita K....where would you suggest I post this instead?
I'd recommend posting on 0-3 months board.
Thank you! That's what I was looking for
I have looked at local Mohels (sp?) and urologists. I would feel MUCH more comfortable with someone like that doing this procedure. I want to avoid shots as much as possible, especially that early on. I have also looked into 8th day circ...which would be a lot more comfortable to us since (according to what I have read) at that time he won't need a vita k shot.
Thank you!
Breastfeeding Counselor with Breastfeeding USA
Babywearing Guide ** Newborn Carriers
Cloth Diaper Guide
Safe Bed Sharing Info
If I were going to circumcise I would elect to have a pediatric urologist do the procedure not the OB. I've heard of a few too many "botched" circ stories that have to get fixed by the specialist. That may be a good route for you if you're looking to avoid the Vit. K shot.
I'm not sure whether a mohel would perform a circumcision outside of the religious ceremony.
1) We did vitamin K in the hospital, but I honestly couldn't tell you if it was the shot or oral. I do know it didn't make a difference to me - he was going to get it.
2) We did 8th day circumcision - with the brit milah and everything. There was no blood, it was quick and (relatively) painless.
3) You may be able to find a urologist mohel - we did! Our Mohel was also the head of pediatric urology at Cedars Sinai in Los Angeles. Given the number of Jewish doctors out there, I would imagine it's not that uncommon.
Speak for yourself. I am AP and believe in the benefits of circumcision.
To answer the original question, we did not decline the Vitamin K shot and I'm not really sure what the benefit would be in avoiding it so I can't say.
Yep. We did both as well. I felt more comfortable doing the circ in the hospital before going home vs returning to have it done a week (or 8 days) later.
Right, because there are no Jewish APs. Get your head out of your butt.
IMO AP is about respecting your child and listening and responding to his/her needs within the context of the family. Yes there are tools - like baby wearing and breastfeeding and bed sharing that help facilitate those responses - but there isn't one right AP way to do things. Lots of APers formula feed, use cribs and strollers, etc. doesn't make someone more or less AP. There are no AP police enforcing the "rules".
We make decisions for our children all the time, including the decision to circumcise. It's one of many decisions that we come to based on our own experiences and yes, what is best for our particular family circumstances.
I don't see how circumcision and AP are so intricately intertwined that it's made you question your entire understanding of AP because no one else was "horrified" that the OP is choosing to circumcise.
I have to agree with you (or maybe I'm putting words in your mouth) that this board is not very AP.
To the OP, if I were to circ again (#1 is, #3 isn't) I would do 8th day. The body peaks in natural vitamin K on the 8th day. My first wasn't circ'd until 3wo (they didn't offer it in hospital, and we had some issues at his 2w appt that delayed us a week). Babies can and do bleed though, I don't want anyone to think that never happens. One of the reasons we got pushed back a week was because a baby was having severe bleeding problems after a circ and the pedi had to take care of that issue.
I circ'ed and gave vit K... if you want my AP "credentials" I also BW, EBF, and bedshare.
OP, what is your resistance to vitamin K? Is it because of the shot (which seems a little weird given your acceptance of circumcision) or is it something else? Most main stream pediatricians believe the research that suggests that oral vitamin K is not very effective at preventing post birth brain bleeds (which I have seen). That's probably why your OB is insisting on it. Sounds like a later circ might be the right choice for your family, but I would make sure you've carefully thought through the risks/benefits of vitamin K, even without the circ. GL! This parenting stuff is tricky!
BFP#2 3/16/11, beta 138; 4/12 Baby/HB DS born 9/10/11 at 29w4d due to partial abruption and PTL
BFP#3 8/19/13 Another boy! 17P, modified bedrest and Nifedipine helped us have a termie! DS2 born 4/19/14 at 38w5d.
1) I do all vax, so I'm a bit ignorant of why you would want to avoid the vitamin K? My son wasn't clotting great to begin with, so we definitely did that one.
2) My pedi did the circ. Because DS was preemie, he advised us to wait it out a bit. We did the circ at his 1 month check up. I was very happy with that, and was able to take the time to be very confident in the decision.
Not sure if that helps you.... Also, I didn't read all the responses, but overall, don't worry about the drama. If you just take the parts that help you and ignore the rest, it will be fine. This topic will stir up any board you post on.
BFP#1 "Watermelon" born 3/2011
BFP#2 "Pumpkin" 7/14/12 ~ EDD 3/23/13 ~ Natural M/C 8/3/12 @ 7 weeks
BFP#3 "Pineapple" born 4/2013
BFP#4 "Grapefruit" EDD 3/29/16
To people wondering about the Vitamin K shot concerns, it has been linked to childhood cancer, especially leukemia. But it's not something I researched, that's just what I found when I googled, I don't know whether it's a credible link, how big of a risk, etc. TBH I have no idea whether LO got the shot
but I'm assuming he did, although perhaps not since we didn't circ?
You are certainly entitled to feel the way you do. My issue wasn't with people being horrified by or opposed to circumcision, but with the blanket statement that anyone who associates with AP is going to feel that way too. I don't care for people putting words in my mouth.
I've found this board to be more open and accepting to various viewpoints, and typically able to discuss different parenting choices without judgment. That is why I like coming here.
I am not saying this to be sarcastic, but I feel sad for you if you parent in such a way that you make choices for your child based on what other AP'ers say is right/wrong. AP states it's not a rigid set of guidelines but at the end of the day you should do what you feel is best for your child. The guy who coined AP also said that mothers should be at home, but I'm sure that many moms here do work because they feel it's best/necessary for their family. You can't follow AP by the book (and you shouldn't).
When making decisions for my own child, I do research on both sides of the coin so I can make an educated, informed decision. I felt that the benefits of circ'ing my son far outweighed any risk.
There are various health benefits to the procedure and it is recommended by the top ranked hospital in the United States. In light of recent research, the AAP will likely be changing their recommendation in the near future. See below.
https://www.cdc.gov/hiv/resources/factsheets/circumcision.htm
https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/news/media/releases/efforts_to_defund_or_ban_infant_male_circumcision_are_unfounded_and_potentially_harmful_johns_hopkins_experts_say
This
Do you know how many babies die of circumcision related complications? Why the HELL would you want to skip the Vitamin k (which aids in blood clotting) if you are planning on having your sons foreskin surgically removed shortly after birth? Your priorities are all wrong... lol
..and people like you are why AP get such a bad rep.
I would suggest you open a medical journal outside of an anti-circ site. The statistics on circumcision-related deaths are extremely low (like 1 in 500,000).
Not saying a person can't be AP and circ (I'm a pretty light APer myself), but to be fair, the cancer risk is blown way out of proportion. When pro-circers say that uncircumcised boys have twice the risk of developing penile cancer, that's true, but misleading. The chances increase from something like 1 in 100,000 to 2 in 100,000.
BFP #1 9/7/10, EDD 5/14/11, Violet born 5/27/11.
BFP #2 4/9/12, EDD 12/16/12, M/C Rory 4/24/12.
BFP #3 10/6/12, EDD 6/16/12., Matilda born 6/17/13.
If we ever have a boy, we will be doing 8th day circumcision. I don't have info handy right now as it has been nearly five years since the last time I was pregnant and facing this decision, but everything we saw and read at the time from respected individuals and sources convinced me that this was the best thing to do if we were going to plow ahead with circumcision. (DH feels strongly about circumcising for cultural/religious reasons.)
I will go back and read responses to see if anyone addresses this/gives good links since the question comes up every once in a while among my IRL friends.
Best answer EVER...
TTCAL Siggy Challenge: "He's my favorite. His birthday is the same as mine almost"
Missing my little one lost at 9 weeks on 2.24.13. brokenhearted but not broken...
d&c 5/21/13... Still Healing, Still Standing...
MMC discovered 10/2/2013, TWINS... d&c 10/7/2013. I still miss you, little ones.
Surgery December 2013 to remove a 10+cm fibroid... Open myomectomy. Benched for 3-9 months...
Will TTC summer Summer 2014 we hope!
Dear God, Since I couldn't hold my little one in my lap and tell him about you, could you hold him in your lap and tell him about me?
PgAL and PAL always welcome...Our son had the Vit K shot because we didn't have any reason not to let them give it to him, it was very quick and he forgot about it right away(The heel pricks for other tests were much worse than the shot was, but still healed fast and he quickly forgot about the discomfort of them too).
We had our son circumcised on the 8th day because of the medical benefits. There was no real bleeding and zero complications. He healed very fast and we were very pleased with our Doctor and his cooperation with our request. He generally does the procedure after two weeks, but was agreeable to it.
We would have had to go elsewhere as well. DH had already lined up a mohel/urologist. I don't think the hospital saying they won't let you come back on day 8 negates the benefit of it. (Not that you were saying this, just wanted to add my thoughts in case someone else did interpret the policy that way.)
There is a HUGE difference. FGM prevents the woman from ever achieving orgasm.
To the OP- we circ'd and we also did Vit K.