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Feel like we're going in circles

happywifemomofonehappywifemomofone member
in TTC after 35
Well-tomorrow we have a consult with the RE that we used for our last 2 IVF cycles with our OE.  We consulted with 3 other REs, but ultimately decided that financially it's in our best interests to wait until January when we can go back to the HMO.  We can afford the donor, but the cost of OOP IVF on top of that would have to be financed.  We were approved for financing, but it took a world of willpower to step back and realize that financing would just not be good for our financial present or future.  The HMO only lets us use one clinic in the entire city, we tried to change more times than we can count within a year.  Our clinic now works with RBI frozen egg bank, so after consult we will try to decide if we should go with a fresh or frozen cycle.  Feel like we've come full circle, be exposed to a thousand different ideas and possibilities-but in many ways feel right back where we started.  Was adamant that by the end of 2012 we would be done no matter what, a girl can change her mind right?  If we do fresh cycle have selected our donor, now we just have to rule out the frozen egg bank.  Not looking forward to dealing with referrals and preapproval headaches for another year though!  Really sucks to know that every decision we make might result in success or more heartache.  This feels harder than OE IVF, because I know that every decision rests with us as a couple.  Head hurts with all the possibilities!
TTC since 10/09 Me-43 DH-44 RE and testing 10/10-11/10, Recommending IVF 1/11 New RE AMA and DOR-DH low motility IVF #1.1 cancelled 3/11 due to poor response IVF #1.2 May 2011, one perfect 8-cell embryo, 3dt-BFN, IVF #2.1 Converted to IUI d/t poor response. New RE 9/2011. IVF 2.2 completed using HGH,EPP,DHEA, Q-10 and accupuncture. Transferred one 8-cell, grade one embryo on 10/19. BFP 10/31/11 Chemical pregancy on 11/2/11. Started stims for IVF #3, our final try, on 12-2-11. ET on 12/18. Transferred 3 Grade A embryos-BFFN Planning DE IVF, late March/early April- Donors ER expected to be 4/2-4/4. PAIF/SAIF welcome
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Re: Feel like we're going in circles

  • Mrs.McIrishMrs.McIrish member

    Big hugs. It is soo hard to figure this all out.  I have to say that I am surprised that you can find any insurance coverage being over 40. Mine cuts you off completely as they deem the problem to be age-related IF and they throw you to the wolves.

    And the answer is YES, you can always change your mind!!!  I have changed my mind sooo many times along this miserable ride and DH never lets me forget it. 

    TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
    DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
    5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
    OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
    DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
    DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
    CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
    DE IVF #3 1/14  ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d

    DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
    First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!

    K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days

    imageimage

    SAIF/PAIF Welcome


    http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com

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  • mtlaurelmtlaurel
    Big hugs, and of course, you can change your mind multiple times. You uncover new information all the time and situations change. All of our decisions re: DE weighed heavily on me before, during and after our cycle.  And now, DH and I aren't in synch. It sucks...
    TTC #1 since June 2010
    Me: 36, DH: 42
    Dx: DOR and MFI

    DH: low count + very low motility; hormones all normal; Sperm DNA Frag. test = poor to fair; male karyotyping normal
    Me: FSH 13.4 + AMH 0.26 + hypothyroidism; Scratch the hypothyrodism (?); Blood clotting and immune panel all negative; endometrial biopsy normal

    IVF #1 (MDLF - Jul/Aug 2011): BFN (9R, 5M, 3F with ICSI, 3dt of 1 10-cell grade 2, no frosties)
    IVF #2 (EP-antagonist - Sep/Oct 2011): BFN (6R, 4M, 3F w/ ICSI, 3dt of 1 6-cell, 1 7-cell, grade 4s, no frosties)
    DE IVF #1 (shared cycle - June 2012): c/p (6R, 6F w/ICSI, 3dt 1 8-cell grade A- and 1 7-cell grade A-; no frosties)
    DE IVF #2 (shared cycle with new donor - Nov/Dec/ 2012): - BFP!!!!! 12/14/12. U/S on 12/27 shows twins!!!!!

    SAIFW/PAIFW
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  • BeckyP005BeckyP005 member
    HUGS. I change my mind every few months or so. Hang in there even though it's so frustrating.

    ME:46 MH:44 DE IVF 2014
    Met with RE 4/11. 2 IUI's BFN. DE best option. Switched clinics to do "shared" program. Had to retake all tests and a mamm that put me behind and then on a DE waiting list for 12 months. Picked a donor!! (10/13/13) Got matched. Estimated transfer in December. After 2.5 years of patiently waiting I will finally cycle....can hardly believe it. DE cycle got cancelled. One of her tests came back positive.  Waiting for another donor. Donor picked!! (1/18/14)

    DE IVF #1 (4/26) BFN  DE FET #1 (6/4) BFP! Beta 1=339 Beta 2=852 Beta 3=9957 EDD 2/22/15!!


     

     

         imageimage 
         image   imageimage



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  • annaliselannalisel member
    There's nothing wrong with changing your mind. Who wouldn't wait a few months in order to save $15000? While you are making your decisions, you can only do what you think best at the time. You can't change anything about the past. This is very exciting for you!
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  • chicagobride_07chicagobride_07 member

    GL with everything!

    image
    DOR and AMA
    2/12-5/12: 4 IUI cycles = all BFN;
    7/12: DE IVF # 1 (with ICSI)- 20R, 16M, 14F, 5DT of 2 blasts; 6 frosties = BFN;
    Lupus anticoagulant initially high, then found to be normal on hematology consult;
    Follow up testing in September all clear;
    Started synthroid for "high normal" TSH;
    FET # 1- late October 2012- BFP on FRER; beta # 1- 21(low), beta # 2- 48 (still low), beta # 3- 132, beta # 4- 1,293; beta # 5- 5,606; last beta- over 100,000. First u/s 11/21- heard heartbeat
    12/12- Officially an OB patient!
    Level 2 ultrasound at 20 weeks shows vasa previa and VCI
    Referral to MFM and mandatory c section for delivery
    Beautiful baby girl born at 34 weeks
    Finally home after 15 day NICU stay!
    Trying for sibling: FET # 2- May 2014; beta 5/31, BFN
    FET #3, early July 2014; beta 7/14, BFN
    DE IVF # 2- August 2014; 14R, 13M, 11F, 5dt of 2 blasts (3 AA), 5 frosties = BFN
    FET #4- December 2014, yet another BFN

    Dr. KK work up shows borderline uterine blood flow, elevated NK cells, and MTHFR mutation (homozygous for c677t)

    Added baby aspirin, prednisone, supplements, Metanx, and intralipids

    Switched to large clinic for final attempt; had endometrial receptivity testing in January; FET March 2015 = yet another BFN

    Likely OAD- NBC

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  • danieleandwaynedanieleandwayne member

    TTC has certainly reinforced the idea for me that we don't make a decision once. Every day we either continue to make that choice by not changing anything, or we change our minds and un-make that choice.

    I say you do what you need to do. And it sounds like you used both your heart and your head to make this choice-- that's a good thing, yes?

    GL!

    *********************************************************************************************

    "You have to do your own growing no matter how tall your grandfather was." 
            -- Abraham Lincoln
     

                               Me:39  MH:39 
    DD born 6/1/2013 after 15 months of TTC with one loss.    
    TTC #2: BFP 4/22 but stalled growth and no HB at 9w3d on 5/30        

    <a href="http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/3a2798" style="font-size:smaller;" >
    <br /> My Ovulation Chart</a>
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