September 2012 Moms

vent/pitty party

Just want to get this off my chest so I can hopefully have a better night. So my best friend has known about my baby shower for about two months now. She texted me today to tell me she wont be able to make it tomorrow.

Long story short she works for the same company I do (we were best friends 5 years prior to working for the same company) and I just happen to be her superior. She requested the weekend off to go to her fathers drag racing event. I made sure she got the entire weekend so that she would be able to do both my shower and the races. I don't have much in the way of family where we live and I just really wanted her at my shower. It'll be a very small shower anyways and I just really wanted her there. With the weather also being so nice this weekend people are starting to flake and do other things with their families. 

I'm just hurt because she's known about this for two months, she's flaking via text message and to top it off she's supposed to bring other people's gifts that couldn't make it to the shower. 

Do i have the right to be upset? I'm really having a hard time being okay with this. 

Re: vent/pitty party

  • I don't know about "the right to be upset" but I'd definitely be hurt and annoyed.  Does she have a good reason for not being able to make it or did she just say she can't come?

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  • You absolutely have a reason to be upset.  I'm sorry. 

    My best friend skipped my daughter's second birthday party so she could hang out with her boyfriend.  When I told her that hurt my feelings, I didn't even get an apology from her.  Needless to say, I wouldn't call her my best friend anymore.  i barely even talk to her anymore.

     

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  • Yes, I would be upset if I were you.  My "best friend" did the same thing, except the reason she gave was a lie and I haven't heard from her in almost 7 weeks!  She bailed on my bridal shower, bachelorette party, and my baby shower and was supposedly setting up a day that we would do something together before the baby, and I haven't heard a peep.  She seems to hate when the attention isn't on her, though, and I've come to the realization that I have to be done with her for my own sanity. 

    What's her excuse that she can't make it?  And is she working something out to get the other people's gifts to you?  Sorry you're in this position. Unless her excuse is valid, unfortunately friends suck sometimes :(

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  • I would be upset. If she's supposed to be your best friend, she should know this day is important to you and not flake out on you, especially via text! I'm sorry you're going through this the day before your shower. I hope tomorrow turns out great and you have a good time!

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  • I totally understand and can relate. My BFF text me, after ignoring me all morning, 2 hours before my shower.  I was really upset with her, and we actually didn't talk for a little more than a week. I waited until she sought me out, and now we are fine. But as my best friend, not having a good reason to bail last minute really upset me.  Just don't let it ruin your day, and enjoy the guests you will have.
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  • her reasoning was so that she could be with her father for the entire day and not just part of it. Kind of wishing I hadn't pulled strings to give her the whole weekend off...i know that's snarky but I'm just snarky and upset right now. :/ 
  • I would be upset too.

    What I've noticed between having DS1 and now this pg is that friends will disappoint. Until they have kids, I feel like they just don't get it. 

  • Yes you have a right to be upset, her excuse that you said she gave you is b.s. especially since you gave her the weekend off so that she could do both. I would be hurt.
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  • imagendelaney89:
    her reasoning was so that she could be with her father for the entire day and not just part of it. Kind of wishing I hadn't pulled strings to give her the whole weekend off...i know that's snarky but I'm just snarky and upset right now. :/ 

    Eh...I can see why she'd want to do this, though, especially if she is close to her dad and/or hasn't seen him in a while. I'd be bummed about it for sure in your position, but in her shoes, if I had to choose between a baby shower and seeing my dad (who lives 6 hrs away and I don't see that much), I'd go spend the weekend with my dad instead.

    I'd be pissed at her if she was constantly blowing me off, though, like always saying that y'all should get together and then never following through or flaking out. 

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