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September 2012 Moms
LILBIT1221
member
Dear FTM's,
LILBIT1221
member
So, I just thought that someone should warn you, that while we are all sick of people asking how we are doing & feeling, once you have this child, no one will give two flying flips about you. All the focus will be on the child that YOU carried for 40(ish) weeks. You are just an oven, made for baking that bun. I wouldn't want you going into this thinking that once your baby makes its appearance that you will still be getting all this attention, that you will then be craving. That's not usually how it works.
Sincerely, Been there done that - a few times.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Dear FTM's,
Well said!
No one is going to care about me in two months.
Emilia Antoinette
10.03.12 at 41w5d
Does that include DH? I don't care about everyone else but I kind of enjoy attention from DH.
Amen.
I'd also like to add that anyone that says they will "come over and help you" meaning, clean, cook, etc. is likely a liar. Everyone in my family said they would help but then just came over and held the baby the whole time. No one cooked, cleaned my toilet bowl, did a load of laundry for me, etc. At least I have a cleaning lady this time around...
I gotta say LilBit you are my favorite Bumpie, this post is soooooooooo TRUE!!
<a href="http://www.thenest.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Home D
First, LB, you are a genius! You are so right. Pretty sure after DD1 was born I could have been on fire and no one would have noticed.
Also, pp is spot on. People say they want to come help, but they are full of BS. All they do is say they want to help while they hold your baby and you are playing the hostess in your sweatpants and unshowered with a messy house.
Sounds good to me. I feel like most of my conversations are already like that. "How is the baby doing today?" (um, let me put on my ute glasses...?) "Do you think he's going to sleep fine?" "Can I see him kick?"
It is true though, I hate all the pregnancy attention, but I miss it when I am laid up in bed with crusty spit up & haven't showered in 3 days.
Sure. Cause we can get them to do that on demand.
People=Stupid
We've had so many people offer this and I've turned it down everytime for this reason alone. I've done it myself--you get distracted by the cute baby. :-)
Nancy James 9.1.12
Calvin Donald 8.27.14
I said the same thing to someone on here a while ago that said they were tired of everyone only caring/asking about the baby. I said sorry, but it's only going to get worse.
And to everyone who says, thank goodness, I hate attention: Here's just a thought - after you have been the one who carried the baby for 9 months & have endured the pain & discomfort of childbirth, and then you are the one awake all night caring for your newborn - you will probably want someone to actually ask you how you are doing once & a while.
Mine too!
Also, you don't realize that when you are pg, yes, people are asking about the baby & rubbing your belly, but ultimately, you haven't had to share the baby with anyone else. You are the only one who has gotten to "hold" your baby this whole time. So when the baby is born & suddenly you have to share your baby with everyone else, it's easy to get resentful when you suddenly become invisible.
I will say, I went and spent 2 days with my sister when my nephew was born and washed, folded and put away 4 loads of laundry and cleaned her entire kitchen. I know that this is not common practice and certainly don't expect anyone to clean my toilet so I can take a nap.
Amen...I was completely baffled when everyone wanted to help clean. Pssh as soon as they walked in my door, they headed straight to the baby.
Dexter 08/31/2012~Summer 07/25/2011~Jack 10/21/2008~Aaron 08/12/2007
Again, hormonal.
When my first son was born, everyone just wanted to take him and leave me in the dust. They kept saying it was because "I needed my rest," but it was mainly code for "we want to pass the baby around without you hovering over us". I had quite a few fits over that.
This time around, I've pretty much shot people down if they say they're going to come help. I know that probably isn't smart, but I also know my hormones will set me up and get excited about someone actually coming to help me out, then I'll be pissed when they come over just to see the baby. The only people who I know will truly help [besides H] are my mom, sister and my sister's boyfriend.
My mom actually told me straight out that she would come hold the baby while i clean/cook etc. She said this when i was barfing my brains out in the first tri and came to clean my house 2x. haha..
Make a pregnancy ticker
Haha...I found that out when I got married, and the few that stuck around have babies or are also prego so not too concerned about that!
Oh gawd, I forgot about that. It's no different then everyone asking the "when are you due? what are you having? is this your first?" I mean, do you want to see my FAMILY TREE? I hate the gawking over baby when you take in public! "How old is he/she? What is his/her name?" Ugh. And, don't EVEN come closer than a foot with your gross germs and opinions.
It's so true. Once baby comes, it's all about them. For me personally, it's fine for the most part. I don't need to have attention on me 24/7. But it is nice to have people ask to if you're still alive every once in a while.
So looking forward to the random strangers coming up to the baby and the unsolicited parenting advice. Can't wait.
My favorite is when my DH asks (now that I'm a SAHM) my DD, "What did you do all day today?" Sure she'll mumble baby-gibberish at him, but she's not going to tell him we went to Target, and Kohl's, and then McDonald's!