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Dads & Dads-to-be
ladyjenna13
member
The Last Month!!
ladyjenna13
member
So, fellow dads-to-be, how can we deal with the emotional rollercoaster that our late-term mothers-to-be are going through? At times I look at my wife and she is not the same woman that I married. She cries at the drop of a hat, over anything at all. She is flighty to the point that she is almost dingy. She is absent minded and forgetful as well. Add that to the obvious physical limitations, and you can get the picture.
I understand that women are the sensitive ones in our relationships, but at this point is is really going overboard. I find myself enjoying work more than every right now because it is less hectic at work.
How to get through the last month!!!!!!!!
Any ideas, guys?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: The Last Month!!
I suggest TV
There are a lot of reality shows about giving birth. "One born every minute" is very good and very realistic.
For us it helped know what expect and helped take her mid off of things. There will be tears! but possibly your own too. It also made her feel like a care about the pregnancy and wanted to actively seek information. This calmed her down which made her less emotionally volatile. It also filled her need to "get things in order" which made her less frustrated about her inability to clean and pack things in her physical shape.
and for me, sitting down next to her watching TV was much better than being berated for doing absolutely nothing. Its tough to be around them at this stage, but it would def be more helpful long term to find things you can enjoy doing rather then pretending to enjoy the things she wants to do.
As a man who has been down that road, and who is going thru it again, I sympathize with you. My wife has been difficult at times but at the same time I understand your gut reaction to being overboard. That's human nature and that's our normal response. What got me thru the last pregnancy and what will get me thru this one is that I have to realize that all the things that my wife is and has done for our family. She is the one that spitting out a watermelon thru that small passage way. She is the one that has to deal with possible tearing of her region (not all women experience it, but some do). She has to lose all that weight and we all know how sensitive women are about their weight and their body issues.
Now im not totally defending her but I'm just putting things in her perspective. And also my wife and I just had this discussion literally like 3 days ago, so I know exactly where you are, and like I said this is our second go around so these issues will prob come up again if you decide to have more kids. Just remember that you are in the home stretch and this time period will be over. You will eventually see your child born, and your appreciation for your wife will continue to grow from this experience.
This is a great response! Thanks for the insight!!!
At this point all I can do is rub the Sarna lotion on her twice a day, carry everything that needs to be carried, walk slowly so I can keep up with her, and try not to say anything stupid so I can avoid the wrath. The wrath is not a good thing...EVER!!
Oh, and even though we have a king size bed, it really does not matter with all of the pillows that my wife is surrounded by. I literally have a 15 inch wide section left from what used to be my side of the bed. It is cute though to watch her turn out of bed to get up. It takes about one minute and it is veerrryyy sllllooowww. I just smile and keep my mouth shut....
The Wrath, again.....
I can appreciate your snarky inputs because it reads less personal than some of the females on here that really need to loosen up a little bit. Some of them still think I am a troll whenever I stand up for myself.
Right now the battle I face is telling her to stop itching because she is starting to cause some real hot spots on her back. That is always fun....
Dude!
I totally feel ya! My wife is going through the exact same thing and since this is our first I rather punch myself in the face than deal sometimes, but I try to focus on the big picture. My son will be here soon, holy crap! I also remind myself that she will be back to normal AND I get an awesome kid to raise. So hang on, you got 6-7 more weeks and then it's over.
And for now...lay low. My wife literally lost her *** in the car yesterday because she had a dream that I cheated on her and left her. WTH? I was literally apologizing for her dream. How do you reassure a woman about a dream....beats me, but this is the life we live right now, just for a season. In the end, she will be back to her ole self, we get to raise this amazing creation and somewhere in between there we might get to have sex. See....big picture.
Along those lines, I went golfing last Friday and I failed to tell her that my buddy was a part of that 4some. I left my tee time confirmation email up on the computer, and later that night she "came across" the email that shed light on my omission. The next morning, on the way to her shower no less, she starts ripping into me while I was driving, talking about me lying about golf, lost trust, and, "what else have I lied about over the years?"
Gee...what fun that was!!
Wow, I must be one lucky SOB. My wife is still pretty much the same as always...just 15 lbs rounder! She's always been a type A, analytical type and has never been the highly emotional type so I think she must be wired differently than a lot of women regardeless of what her hormones are up too. I will say she wants me home more these days which is understandable considering she could possibly "go" any of these up coming weeks.
That being said my first wife was a HOT MESS when pregnant. Emotional, crazy, moody, absent minded, scatter brained, angry, lazy, unstable, volatile, spacey, irrational, insecure, unpredictable, neurotic, fickle, hyper-sensitive and in general just kind of scary. I could go on...it was terrifying!!!
I now know that much of the crazy behavior is hormone and insecurity based though. My wife has even shown me studies that chemically show a pregnant woman's brain in different that her brain before or after pregnancy. Plus many pregnant women are dealing with limited sleep. We all get a little punchy when we don't sleep. I do think though that pregnancy brings out some of the underlying personality traits that don't always rear their ugly heads under "normal" situations-but what do I know?
Quick Update:
So my wife is in full-blown nesting mode, which seems to have taken much of the edge off of her. She is actually glowing, and she is really starting to come into her own as a mother.
The itching is still non-stop, but should stop as soon as she gives birth to Jacob.
LIfe is very good in our house lately, and we are both very excited about meeting our son as we go through the last month. Here is a picture of one of his bookshelves in his room. The amount of time we spend in his room already is disturbing on some level...