ok, I'm pissed, how would you react?

FutureMrsTowns · July 2012

ok, so I just found out from DH that his mothers first response to finding out I was pregnant was "are you sure it's yours?" because he was deployed until about a month before we found out and she didn't think you could find out that soon...

00jennifer00 · July 2012

Oh my gosh, that's wretched! Maybe send her a calendar with dtd dates or your O date marked and your first bfp marked and a little snip-it about how pregnancy tests work. Oh my gosh, who says that crap?!

yecal262 · July 2012

Woah! Ugh I would be mad. Wth is Wrong with people!

FutureMrsTowns · July 2012

or maybe I can give her my fertility doctor's phone number...

I swear t God if it EVER is even hinted at that she wants a paternity test I will straight up punch her in the face, his mom or not, that's ridiculous

Spacebunny19 · July 2012

First off, well, sorry you have this fool as a MIL.

Second, ask DH to not overshare things like this with a pregnant lady.

There are some things you can't un-know; my ex MIL told my ex that she thought I was just using him to get through school (I was getting an advanced degree while he was working) and he told me this. It poisoned what was already a craptastic relationship. (Irony is that while I was working and paying for his living expenses while HE was getting advanced education, he cheated on me & divorced me, so apparently his mom was just confused as to which of us was the scumbag.)

So hopefully DH will zip his lip and not overshare things like this with you. All you can do is forget you ever heard it (or pretend) and focus on the good stuff, like your new LO.

Sorry, and HUGS.

yecal262 · July 2012

I just don't understand why your mil would think she know so much about your bedroom life to know when you ovulate or when y'all sleep together! Insane. I would ignore her unless she said something where I could hear har smart ass like or not she would be getting a piece of my mind mil or not.

Jasmine1082 · July 2012

00jennifer00:
Oh my gosh, that's wretched! Maybe send her a calendar with dtd dates or your O date marked and your first bfp marked and a little snip-it about how pregnancy tests work. Oh my gosh, who says that crap?!

To hell with that b**ch! Your personal life isn't her business.

PrimRoseMama · July 2012

Wow your MIL is a snatch.

sami1784 · July 2012

Coming out of lurking, though not currently pregnant.

Your MIL sounds like a gem. The same kind of gem as my aunt. When I found out I was pregnant with LO in 2011, DH had only been home from BOLC a month and two days. He got home on December 8th and I found out we were expecting on January 10th. Her response: "That was fast..." as if to insinuate that it wasn't DH's baby... on my sister's wall on FB where my sister had posted she was going to be an aunt. I was livid and made it quite clear to my aunt that LO definitely belongs to DH and quite frankly I didn't appreciate her insinuating otherwise. The best response to give your MIL - "Well, we obviously got it right on the first try" and leave it at that.

emjo03 · July 2012

I'd be upset just as you are.

By the way, isn't that typical near military bases? Those deployed return and suddenly the unit has a bunch of newly expecting Dads and Moms?

Next time you see MIL just tell her, "Of course it's your son's child. He was deployed for <insert time here>. What do you think we did for the first 4 weeks he was home? We had <insert time gone here> to make up for!!!!"

sgb721 · July 2012

Wow is really all I can say. I'd be livid too

carig63 · July 2012

When she wants to watch the baby, tell her you're not sure she's his or her grandma. But when you find out you'll get back to her.

Beaglechon2012 · July 2012

Oh, look who it is! I'm sorry she said that to you. I guess it's just because "women are bltches" though, right?

Or when you said this: "Also, women are bitches, and women in here are bitches on hormones dealing with disappointment on a regular basis, so ykno, tis to be expected. I've been on boards of all sorts for years and this is by FAR the most hostile one I've ever been on. " Did you only mean the ladies on TTGP?

Shayliz · July 2012

Beaglechon2012:
Oh, look who it is! I'm sorry she said that to you. I guess it's just because "women are bltches" though, right?
Or when you said this: "Also, women are bitches, and women in here are bitches on hormones dealing with disappointment on a regular basis, so ykno, tis to be expected. I've been on boards of all sorts for years and this is by FAR the most hostile one I've ever been on. " Did you only mean the ladies on TTGP?

Yessssssssssss for me not being the only person to remember this one. Go Beags. She also went off on 3T, although my hormones are keeping me from doing a Google search.

renc9828 · July 2012

Oh man I would be pissssed! I agree with the PP who mentioned the cold shoulder treatment.

This is our welcome home from deployment baby and I am wondering how many "that was fast" comments we will get.

BabyShipp · July 2012

carig63:
When she wants to watch the baby, tell her you're not sure she's his or her grandma. But when you find out you'll get back to her.

This would probably be what I would do. She sounds lovely!

Jbosarge85 · August 2012

DH's best friend said the same thing when he found out I was pregnant. I was livid, and so was DH. He told his friends that I'm not a hoe like some of his previous girlfriends. I gave him the cold shoulder and once he realized how much it pissed me off/hurt my feelings he apologized. But I'm still a little bitter

ChevyFam717 · August 2012

OMG - sounds like a monster in law... but I had a friend who's FIL replied, "Oh no, why?" when they got pregnant 6 months into marriage (they'd been together for a long time before)...

I guess it just teaches you a lesson that from now on- don't tell her until 12 weeks, then she can feel like a fool for not knowing when you first found out...

FYI - I got a BFP at 3 weeks... super early...

miakrita · August 2012

Spacebunny19:
First off, well, sorry you have this fool as a MIL.

Second, ask DH to not overshare things like this with a pregnant lady.

There are some things you can't un-know; my ex MIL told my ex that she thought I was just using him to get through school (I was getting an advanced degree while he was working) and he told me this. It poisoned what was already a craptastic relationship. (Irony is that while I was working and paying for his living expenses while HE was getting advanced education, he cheated on me & divorced me, so apparently his mom was just confused as to which of us was the scumbag.)

So hopefully DH will zip his lip and not overshare things like this with you. All you can do is forget you ever heard it (or pretend) and focus on the good stuff, like your new LO.

Sorry, and HUGS.

This. Sorry you have to deal with this.

njgal26 · August 2012

I'd be pissed too! My mil is a major pain in the butt b/c she says whatever she wants no matter how rude or inappropriate. I suggest either your hubby and/or you talk to her about how comments like the one she made are not acceptable so she knows that you guys won't stand for that

njgal26 · August 2012

carig63:
When she wants to watch the baby, tell her you're not sure she's his or her grandma. But when you find out you'll get back to her.

This is good too! Big Smile

dande2129 · August 2012

I'm clearly in the minority here... but I don't think the question was all that bad. You have to remember that this is his mother, and I can only assume that she's middle aged+, where they didn't really have the HPT technology that they do now. Women find out much, much sooner than they did in "her time." Again, I don't know how old she is, but if it bothers you that much, I'd talk to her about it like an adult.

I don't know if this constitutes monster-in-law unless she has made underhanded jabs at you in the past.

kllrbnny · August 2012

Spacebunny19:

First off, well, sorry you have this fool as a MIL.

Second, ask DH to not overshare things like this with a pregnant lady.

There are some things you can't un-know; my ex MIL told my ex that she thought I was just using him to get through school (I was getting an advanced degree while he was working) and he told me this. It poisoned what was already a craptastic relationship. (Irony is that while I was working and paying for his living expenses while HE was getting advanced education, he cheated on me & divorced me, so apparently his mom was just confused as to which of us was the scumbag.)

So hopefully DH will zip his lip and not overshare things like this with you. All you can do is forget you ever heard it (or pretend) and focus on the good stuff, like your new LO.

Sorry, and HUGS.

+1

and Spacebunny, sorry you had to go through that. Guess that apple didn't fall far from the tree.

Chocodoxies · August 2012

dande2129:
Women find out much, much sooner than they did in "her time." Again, I don't know how old she is, but if it bothers you that much, I'd talk to her about it like an adult.

Nah, anyone with a radio or a TV knows that with most HPT's you can test "up to four days before your missed period".

LeLe222 · August 2012

I was with the FOB for a year and a half before we got pregnant. He has become very distant since then and doesn't really want to be involved. I had my first appointment where I was told that I'd need the mother and father's family history (this being my first baby I didn't know how important it was to have it). So of course I had mine and asked him if he could just give me the information I needed, but he refused, so I called his mother thinking she could help me! She was no help at all.. telling me that I was going to be raising this baby on my own because "no one cares about this baby and no one wants to take care of this baby." I'm white and FOB is black and puerto rican, so she continued to tell me that "my zebra baby was going to be retarded and no one wanted anything to do with a zebra baby." I told her that she was ignorant and a sad excuse for a woman and hung up the phone. I don't think you should pay her any mind, if she wants to insult you, let her.. It might eat at you a little bit, but don't give her the satisfaction of letting her know she upset you, you know who you laid down with.. that's all that matters!

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