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September 2012 Moms
STMs: Plan for your other children
Have you guys started thinking of what you'll do with your other child/children when you go into labor?
Do you have family close by that can help?
Will you have something etched in stone or will you just wait to see based on the logistics of when you go into labor?
Will your child/children go to the hospital while you're in labor or after the baby is already born?
Will you have a bag pre-packed and ready to go for them too?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: STMs: Plan for your other children
Ideally, my MIL and SIL will both come over to babysit the day of my scheduled c/s. If my c/s gets moved up for whatever reason (i.e. emergency), we'll see if my SIL is working that day / if she can get it off, and if not, my brother will babysit.
They are coming to our house, so no bags packed for them, but I will have laid out clothing and extras (diapers, jammies) for the kids.
My kids will likely visit the day after my c/s (or in the evening, if I get in early that morning).
The only family I have who is close by is my SiL (1.5 hours away) but she has a job and no car of her own (shares with her cousin/roommate) and isn't the kind of person to be super helpful.
Everyone who will likely stay with him is also 1.5 hours away, sometimes in different directions.
1st choice is my best friend. She'll be finishing her internship in late August and probably not starting a job for at least a week or two. *IF* it works out timing-wise, she'll come stay here with him. She is my first choice because she'll only have to keep up with 1 kid and she can bring him to the hospital after birth.
2nd choice is a SAHM friend who is also a doula. There is a chance she'll come and be a second doula (for the fun/friendship of it) if she isn't needed to watch DS. She'd likely bring her son, which means we may not have DS come to the hospital, though we may be able to work something out.
3rd choice is a SAHM friend who would definitely bring her son. Her son can sometimes be a bully to mine, and her parenting style is quite different than mine, so I'd prefer not her, but it is nice to have the backups.
I also have two friends who are local (I moved here in November so my friends here aren't nearly as close as my farther away friends) who have offered to watch him until the farther away people get here if necessary.
DD2 October 2010
DS September 2012
In-laws live a cornfield away, so we'll drop DD off on the way to the hospital. Unless I'm already so far along that I'm afraid to waste time loading and unloading her from the car, then I'll have tell them to come get her from our house. MIL used to babysit twice a week, so they have everything they need for her, so no pre-packed bag necessary. DH will be coming back home to stay the night with her after DS is born.
My Mom and sisters will be alerted that I'm on my way to hospital, and if they make it for the birth, they can be there. Everyone gets kicked out after he's born though, so DH and I can get some alone time with DS. After we've moved into the recovery room, family can come visit/meet the baby. My sister is going to pick DD up after all the grandparents and my sisters & brother have met the baby, so that she can meet her brother without a lot of commotion going on. If she were older, I'd have her meet DS first, before the rest of the family, but she is not going to know what's going on... and I'd like to be cleaned up a bit and not nursing at the time she comes in the room to avoid any baby jealousy drama.
Have you guys started thinking of what you'll do with your other child/children when you go into labor? Yes, we have a sitter lined up for them for the times DH will be with me at the hospital.
Do you have family close by that can help? Yes
Will you have something etched in stone or will you just wait to see based on the logistics of when you go into labor? Etched in stone because I have an RCS date. If this baby comes before that date then we have backup plans for sitters.
Will your child/children go to the hospital while you're in labor or after the baby is already born? I have really small children, (4,3,and 1), and I dont think the hospital is a place for them at that time, so I told hubby if he is up for it he can bring them to visit the new baby if he would like, or they can just meet the baby when we get home.
Will you have a bag pre-packed and ready to go for them too? No, but I will have easy meals ready and available, PLUS a sheet of instructions for the kids for hubby and whoever is watching them. I know that sounds odd but I work hard to keep our kids on a schedule and I want the sitter to do the same.Dexter 08/31/2012~Summer 07/25/2011~Jack 10/21/2008~Aaron 08/12/2007
Our families are on the opposite coasT. My mom is planning to come out in mid Sept, so hopefully I can hold out for that long. If not, I'll drop DD off with a friend.
We'll bring DD to the hospital a day or two after birth...mostly so she can see me. No bag (other than a diaper bag) will be needed in her case.
DH will be home each night with DD.
BFP #3 via cancelled IUI ~ C (2lb 3oz; HELLP) 5/16/11
BFP #4 via the natural (free!) way ~ E (8lb 11oz) 9/13/12
Have you guys started thinking of what you'll do with your other child/children when you go into labor? Yes, but I haven't asked anyone yet. I'm leaning towards asking my parents, I know they will say yes but I hate to burden them with it. They live on a dairy farm and have to get up very early, plus they are 2 hrs away. DD doesn't always sleep great away from home. Other choice is ask MIL to keep her the night before RCS and the day of. Then I have a SAHM friend that could keep her the other days when DH comes to the hospital. He never stays over. Then DD could sleep in her bed.
Do you have family close by that can help? DH's family is close but usually aren't able to help/babysit so I don't like to ask them.
Will you have something etched in stone or will you just wait to see based on the logistics of when you go into labor? I'm having a RCS so unless the date moves it's etched in stone.
Will your child/children go to the hospital while you're in labor or after the baby is already born? Probably not. Maybe the day I get discharged.
Will you have a bag pre-packed and ready to go for them too? Since I'm having a RCS I don't need a pre-packed bag. DH can restock the diaper bag daily.
My IL's with take DS when it's go time, they don't live far from us. I'm assuming IL's will bring DS to the hospital with them after I've had the baby. Children under 13 are not allowed in the L&D room once pushing has commenced.
Because IL's watch DS during the week already - we can literally just drop him off and they have everything he needs.
My MIL has volunteered to come stay with DS when I go into labor. She's about 35 min away, but I do have family within a few miles of my house that can come stay with him until she gets here if I'm unable to stay and wait.
I will have her bring him up to the hospital after the baby is born. Maybe even the next day depending on the time he is born.
We're lucky to have my parents and siblings within 5 min of our house.
I think the plan is if it's during the working day, my mom and dad have the most flexibility to leave work and come to our house to stay with DD. My mom wants to be in the delivery room again, so my dad or sister will eventually be with DD overnight.
My sister works right by our hospital, so I assume she will be bringing DD in shortly after LO #2 is here.
I think this stresses me out the most.
My mom is the one I trust the most with DS1 and she's the best with him but she's 45 minutes away. I think the first day she'll come stay with him (overnight too) but when she wants to come visit at the hospital I'm hoping my in-laws can stay at my house with DS1 until my mom gets back. They only live a few blocks away.
DH will come home each night after that first night so DS1 can be in his own bed. I don't want to disrupt his routine. And during the day he'll just be shuffled between family, whether it's at my house or not.
I'm not sure yet if DS1 will come visit at the hospital - that may confuse him even more.
Ugh, I need to get this figured out. I hate to leave things up in the air.
I feel the same way about both of these statements. Both my IL's and my parents live 15 minutes away from the hospital, so we'll probably leave DS and our dog with my IL's since they will probably feel uncomfortable being at the hospital with me in labor. I want my mom to be at the hospital with me until I'm pushing so I'm hoping it works out that my IL's can take DS.
I'm such a planner so it's hard for me to leave this open, but there's so many variables that can go in to this that it's too hard to plan it out.