The reasons why I Love you... Lurkers come play too!

pottermommy · July 2012

So we did this on a FB group and I wanted to do it here too.

We all focus alot on our angels and we all are just trying to cope. So tell each other.....

What makes you love the other ladies here?

What makes you love yourself (or what about yourself)?

pottermommy · July 2012

I shall start

I love you because: You make me see that losing someone is not something you take steps to get through, it is a new lifestyle, a new heart, a new mind. You make me see the differences in myself that I never noticed before. You make me feel like I am worth something to someone and that I do matter.

What I love about me: I love my ability to smile even as the world crashes around me. I love that I remember tiny details and don't forget them.

lrichmond86 · July 2012

This is a great idea!

What makes you love the other ladies here?

On days when I can't stand the rest of the world and everything seems unfair; when I'm angry or sad or misunderstood; when I don't have the right words to match what's in my heart; I come here. I read what others have said and it makes me feel a little less alone in this horrible road that we all travel. No matter what I'm feeling, there's someone else who understands. No matter how trivial the matter, the ladies here support me. The women on this board have been my saving grace for the last seven and a half months. There aren't words enough to express how thankful I am to have you all in my life.

What makes you love yourself (or what about yourself)?

Through this journey I've learned to appreciate things about myself that I used to hate. I love how self-aware I am and that I wear my heart on my sleeve. I love that I am able to talk about my experience in a way that is empowering and positive (not that my loss was a positive experience, but I certainly feel that positive things have resulted from the process of dealing with that loss).

fluttergirlmoonchild79 · July 2012

What makes you love the other ladies here?

I love that you all get what I deal with and that I don't feel crazy when I'm here the way people on the outside can make us feel sometimes

What makes you love yourself (or what about yourself)?

I honestly love that I'm surviving. At the beginning, I really didn't think I could. Sometimes I still can't but that fact that I am where I am makes me proud. I'm also very proud to be the mommy of an angel. Sure, I'd love to be the mommy to a baby here on earth but how many people can honestly say they're the mommy of an angel? I find it special.

Petunia844 · July 2012

What makes you love the other ladies here?

While nobody wants to be in this club, I find that loss moms that I meet in real life and online just have an automatic bond. It's something nobody else will understand. We just completely understand and accept each other for all of our differences, all of our flaws, it's like a sisterhood. This sisterhood means I never feel completely alone, when nobody else will understand me, I know you all will.

What makes you love yourself?

Like most of you, I think I've found parts of myself I didn't know existed. I found a strength to continue on in a life when I had every reason to just give up. I'm proud of myself for being where I am now.

careyalis · July 2012

I love you because you understand the depth of pain in my heart. You help me to feel like I belong--this is the only place where I am normal. You are always here as a sounding board for my crazy days and as an inspiration when I feel like I can no longer go on living. I look at the ladies who have made it so far and realize that there is hope for me to be happy. You get my fears and insecurities, but you love me anyways. I truly love you all and consider you a vital role in my survival these past 8months. (I came here while I was still ctt)

I love myself because i now know that I can get through anything. I created a beautiful little girl and sacrificed my body for hers. I know that nothing in life can be harder than losing my child and somehow I have found the will to stay standing through this storm.

weddedwife · July 2012

I love you because you all "get it"; you know the pain I have felt and the hard road I walk. Here, I am normal and am accepted. I don't feel awkward or ostracized or abandoned. This has been a place of solace for me since last November; this is a place of calm in a storm. Here I am understood. I love you all for the support we all give each other. I love the way we are honest & real about the sometimes ugly truths of losing a baby.

I love that I have found a way to love my son and not regret him (because I can't do both). While I'd rather have not gone through this, I love that I am a better person for it, that I am more compassionate and able to truly enjoy the little things in life, the blessings that I still have in my life.

Bayberry12 · July 2012

What makes you love the other ladies here?

I am so grateful for this board and all the amazing women here, because you have helped me get through some very dark days when writing or reading a post would always bring me tears. To the ones who have been here for some time now, I really look to you for strength and advice and you always know the right things to say, when everyone else in my life is just saying the wrong thing. And all the new moms who have joined after me, (I still can't believe I see a new mom almost every week) I know what it's like to come here, and not wanting to be here, but it's like you need to be here. Everyone here is so compassionate and understanding. I want to thank ALL the women here for truly making this a safe place with zero drama.

What makes you love yourself (or what about yourself)?

I think I am still working on this. It's hard to love yourself or be gentle with yourself right now. My goals sometimes don't seem big enough, but I am trying and I am getting through this. I remember thinking "how can go on" but I did go on, and I still am going on.

tuscanbride2007 · July 2012

What makes you love the other ladies here?

The strength of all the ladies to hold others up. The willingness to listen no matter how "trivial" someone feels about what they are venting about. The overall bond that we all have with complete strangers. I never thought that I could find such wonderful women to help me through such a devastating event in my life. I am so grateful for each and everyone of you.

What makes you love yourself (or what about yourself)?

I love that I now know that I can handle a tragic event. I (thankfully) never had to deal with a tragedy in my life, so I had no idea whether or not I was going to be able to make it through. I'm not saying that it is not the hardest thing I have had to endure, but I now know that I am not going to "check out" and give up. This journey has also made me a better person in that I can handle others grief better. I was never comfortable in comforting others. Now I feel like I can sit down next to someone and hold their hand as they navigate through this terrible journey.

Heatherhah · July 2012

What makes you love the other ladies here? The week following my loss I was looking for a site to help with this and I asked and that very next week the loss board came about. Without you wonderful ladies I think i would hve gone crazy. i also met a bumpie from here in real life in my loss support group she and I are friend and we get it. I think that all of the ladies on this board just get each other. Like petunia said we have a sisterhood. A sad one but we have one. We all understand each others pain! I love you ladies and without you I wouldn't have been able to be in a place where I am now.

What makes you love yourself (or what about yourself)? I suppose I love the strength tha I have to get up every day and do my normal life even though it is never going to be the same I want to make this new normal okay for my other kids and future kids. I bring Sydney up in my life all the time she is a main topic of my life all the time. I am proud fo rmyself for going on and moving forward.

Petunia844 · July 2012

This post makes me wish we weren't all so far away. I wonder if it would be at all realistic to hope that maybe one day we could meet somewhere and have a loss mom weekend together? Probably not...but a girl can dream... I can see it now, some fun dinners and some real tears and some real hugs... just finally getting to meet you all.

Carolee · July 2012

I love this board and the ladies here because you all understand - you've been there. I hate that we're all here, but it helps that I don't have to go through this journey alone. I know I've been quiet on the board lately, but knowing you're here for me if/when I need you is so comforting.

I love myself because when we lost Eliott, I honestly didn't know how I could possibly keep going on. As cliche as it sounds and as much as I hate it when people tell me I'm so strong, I am stronger than I ever thought I could be. I'm still standing.

Carolee · July 2012

Petunia844:
This post makes me wish we weren't all so far away. I wonder if it would be at all realistic to hope that maybe one day we could meet somewhere and have a loss mom weekend together? Probably not...but a girl can dream... I can see it now, some fun dinners and some real tears and some real hugs... just finally getting to meet you all.

I would LOVE to do this sometime. It's a big dream, but I totally think it's doable.

yosemitemom · July 2012

I love that you are all so honest. I love that I can come here and share horrible details of my experience that will frighten my friends and family that have not been through this experience. You've all been there and you.get.it.

I believe I am a good mother to both my living and not-living daughters. I love that I took my passion for nature (which started as a toddler) and made it a career. I love that the work I do every day will benefit my daughter's future. I am learning to love that while I am strong, it's ok to not be strong sometimes; grief has brought me to my knees more than once.

weddedwife · July 2012

Petunia844:
This post makes me wish we weren't all so far away. I wonder if it would be at all realistic to hope that maybe one day we could meet somewhere and have a loss mom weekend together? Probably not...but a girl can dream... I can see it now, some fun dinners and some real tears and some real hugs... just finally getting to meet you all.

I know!! I would love this too. It would really be amazing.

Petunia, I can't believe that we are both So-Calers and have not managed to meet yet. I know we are like 3 hours away but... One day!

Petunia844 · July 2012

weddedwife:
Petunia844:
This post makes me wish we weren't all so far away. I wonder if it would be at all realistic to hope that maybe one day we could meet somewhere and have a loss mom weekend together? Probably not...but a girl can dream... I can see it now, some fun dinners and some real tears and some real hugs... just finally getting to meet you all.
I know!! I would love this too. It would really be amazing.
Petunia, I can't believe that we are both So-Calers and have not managed to meet yet. I know we are like 3 hours away but... One day!

I know! If it wasn't so far I would totally come keep you company on bed rest! Too bad I'd be way too scared to go that far from dh and my ob!

Lavender&Lillies · July 2012

I know that I don't post much, but I read posts every day and you all have helped me so much over the past three months. I appreciate how honest and supportive everyone is. I feel like this really is a safe place to share and one of the few places I can go to be truly understood. When I feel alone and start to feel sorry for myself, I think of all of you who are going through losing your babies too and I don't feel so lonely. Thank you all for sharing your journey and for giving me hope when it is sometimes hard to find.

Something that I love about myself is that I am supportive of my friends and family and saw this support reflected back at me when I needed it the most.

StephK86 · August 2012

Good idea Lynds!

What makes you love the other ladies here?

I often feel I do not belong anywhere in this world. I don't have anyone close to me IRL who has lost a child (besides my aunt who lives far away) and it makes me feel like the loneliest, saddest girl in the world. Like I'm the only one going through this. Then I come on here post my feelings or see others posting something I am thinking and it makes me feel like I belong. I love that everyone here is supportive, honest, open and cares about the other women on here. We have all been through enough and need a place to come where we won't be judged. This is is it and that is why I love you all.

What makes you love yourself (or what about yourself)?

I love that I can keep pushing even on days where I can't imagine getting out of bed. I love that my kids will always have happy holiday memories because even if my heart is ripping in two on the inside they still make me smile on the outside.I love that losing Gavin has made me want to help so many people and have the courage to do so. I have definitely always been there for my friends but I think even more so now that I have gone through hell and back.

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