50 Shades baby boom - kill me

RedPhoenix625 · July 2012

Okay, regardless of whether or not you're a Fifty Shades of Grey fan, who else is tired of hearing it called "Mommy Porn" and also being credited with a potential baby boom? Must be nice.

I don't want to post the actual article, because it's on my local paper's site and I'm a paranoid internet person, but basically it's this whole article about a few local families who are due with a "Fifty Shades baby". Just popped up on my FB. Grrrr.

I'm waiting for the day when this becomes one of the standard quips we get. In addition to "When you relax, it'll happen", and "Have you tried propping your hips up?" now we'll have to hear, "Have you read 50 Shades? I read it and jumped my husband and now I'm pregnant!"

Is it time to drink yet? Angry

Vent over.

LLPtobe · July 2012

RedPhoenix625:

Is it time to drink yet?

It's just after noon here, cheers!!! Drinks

lavril · July 2012

If books cause pregnancy, I'm pretty sure a lot of us would be KTFU by now!

RedPhoenix625 · July 2012

lavril:
If books cause pregnancy, I'm pretty sure a lot of us would be KTFU by now!

Dude. I'd have a whole litter by now.

ravenclaw1 · July 2012

omg. I'm on your team.

those books are so dumb. I read them (yes, I did read all three, and it was mainly just out of sheer curiosity). Nothing in them made me want to go get freaky. She's a dumb girl, he's an abusive as5hole, their relationship is so f-ed up. NOT this hot steamy romance novel people are painting it out to be.

and if people are touting it as the cure to not being able to get pregnant, they're dumb

ct103 · July 2012

BAAHAAAA! If only a book could get me pregnant!

Man, people say the stupidest sh!t sometimes.

jenn0021 · July 2012

nola78:
If I'm lucky enough to get KTFU and have a kid in the next year or so, I will seriously harm anyone who implies that 50 Shades had anything to do with it.

This.

Smash2009 · July 2012

I started reading them...have yet to finish, and I'm tired of hearing about them, all together. It was funny and cool at first. But now I'm over it Confused

RedPhoenix625 · July 2012

jenn0021:
nola78:
If I'm lucky enough to get KTFU and have a kid in the next year or so, I will seriously harm anyone who implies that 50 Shades had anything to do with it.

This.

Word. I can imagine the conversation now.

"Congrats! Is this a 50 Shades baby?"

"Why yes! After I read it, I asked my RE if he was into that kind of thing, and he totally was! He tied me up and knocked me around a little before sticking a tube filled with my husband's sperm into my cervix."

lavril · July 2012

RedPhoenix625:
lavril:
If books cause pregnancy, I'm pretty sure a lot of us would be KTFU by now!

Dude. I'd have a whole litter by now.

Haha! True!! I thought the book was more disturbing than anything.

Now if people wanted to draw conclusions about Channing Tatum's insanely sexy dancing....that'd be another story, LOL.

lavril · July 2012

RedPhoenix625:

jenn0021:

nola78:
If I'm lucky enough to get KTFU and have a kid in the next year or so, I will seriously harm anyone who implies that 50 Shades had anything to do with it.

This.

Word. I can imagine the conversation now.

"Congrats! Is this a 50 Shades baby"

"Why yes! After I read it, I asked my RE if he was into that kind of thing, and he totally was! He tied me up and knocked me around a little before sticking a tube filled with my husband's sperm into my cervix."

OMG - this make be completely burst out laughing. I'm just picturing my totally professional/reserved RE. Hilarious!

pkaren · July 2012

I still can't even bring myself to finish the first book....I don't even care anymore. The story is TERRIBLE, she's stupid, he's effed up. And it's not even good porn, it so ridiculously corny. I read some of it out loud to DH and he burst out laughing. I'm a Shades of Grey hater.

RedPhoenix625 · July 2012

pkaren:
I still can't even bring myself to finish the first book....I don't even care anymore. The story is TERRIBLE, she's stupid, he's effed up. And it's not even good porn, it so ridiculously corny. I read some of it out loud to DH and he burst out laughing. I'm a Shades of Grey hater.

You may enjoy this: Gilbert Gottfried Reads Fifty Shades of Grey

ravenclaw1 · July 2012

pkaren:
I still can't even bring myself to finish the first book....I don't even care anymore. The story is TERRIBLE, she's stupid, he's effed up. And it's not even good porn, it so ridiculously corny. I read some of it out loud to DH and he burst out laughing. I'm a Shades of Grey hater.

one night, I'm driving around with H and our two friends (they're a couple), and we started listening to the audio book just for kicks. funniest.thing.ever.

Smash2009 · July 2012

lavril:
RedPhoenix625:

jenn0021:

nola78:
If I'm lucky enough to get KTFU and have a kid in the next year or so, I will seriously harm anyone who implies that 50 Shades had anything to do with it.

This.

Word. I can imagine the conversation now.

"Congrats! Is this a 50 Shades baby"

"Why yes! After I read it, I asked my RE if he was into that kind of thing, and he totally was! He tied me up and knocked me around a little before sticking a tube filled with my husband's sperm into my cervix."

OMG - this make be completely burst out laughing. I'm just picturing my totally professional/reserved RE. Hilarious!

HAHAHA....me too! Love it, Red Phoenix!

kread8 · July 2012

ravenclaw1:

omg. I'm on your team.

those books are so dumb. I read them (yes, I did read all three, and it was mainly just out of sheer curiosity). Nothing in them made me want to go get freaky. She's a dumb girl, he's an abusive as5hole, their relationship is so f-ed up. NOT this hot steamy romance novel people are painting it out to be.

and if people are touting it as the cure to not being able to get pregnant, they're dumb

Haha I loved this whole post... and completely agree with all of it! I'm impressed you powered through them though - I stopped 1/2 way through the 2nd book and just could not bring myself to finish it... That's probably the first book that I have ever stopped reading in the middle of it!

RedPhoenix625 · July 2012

I'm so glad I could provide you guys with a Friday chuckle!

Here's another one:

"Congrats! Is this a 50 Shades baby?"

"As a matter of a fact, I read it aloud to my husband while he jizzed in a cup so that we could take it to a doctor's office so that they could do sciency stuff to it and then shove it up my sex hole. It was so HOT!"

or

"Actually, no, this baby resulted from traditional sex. Our 50 Shades babies didn't make it." (My bitter b!tch coming out now...)

I could keep going with this...

I will say, I'm sure there will be babies that resulted from 50 Shades-inspired sex. It just kills me how easy some people have it. And that it's just taken for granted that sex=baby. Even the fertile among us are most likely not going to get KUed from one night of sex, regardless how inspired.

I have a tutoring appointment at 2, and I may or may not be considering bringing a spiked thermos with me, because I'm just not sure I can hold out any longer today...

(Disclaimer: no, I am not actually going to go tutor this kid while drinking in the library. Probably.)

frogs007 · July 2012

jenn0021:
nola78:
If I'm lucky enough to get KTFU and have a kid in the next year or so, I will seriously harm anyone who implies that 50 Shades had anything to do with it.

This.

Seriously.

frogs007 · July 2012

jenn0021:
nola78:
If I'm lucky enough to get KTFU and have a kid in the next year or so, I will seriously harm anyone who implies that 50 Shades had anything to do with it.

This.

Seriously.

frogs007 · July 2012

jenn0021:
nola78:
If I'm lucky enough to get KTFU and have a kid in the next year or so, I will seriously harm anyone who implies that 50 Shades had anything to do with it.

This.

Seriously.

jle625 · July 2012

Oh I had already heard it from the girls I worked with! I was like nope I was totally on my period when I read them! Huh?

dtowngirl · July 2012

pkaren:
I still can't even bring myself to finish the first book....I don't even care anymore. The story is TERRIBLE, she's stupid, he's effed up. And it's not even good porn, it so ridiculously corny. I read some of it out loud to DH and he burst out laughing. I'm a Shades of Grey hater.

dtowngirl · July 2012

pkaren:
I still can't even bring myself to finish the first book....I don't even care anymore. The story is TERRIBLE, she's stupid, he's effed up. And it's not even good porn, it so ridiculously corny. I read some of it out loud to DH and he burst out laughing. I'm a Shades of Grey hater.

This exactly.

1MrsDunn · July 2012

RedPhoenix625:
jenn0021:
nola78:
If I'm lucky enough to get KTFU and have a kid in the next year or so, I will seriously harm anyone who implies that 50 Shades had anything to do with it.

This.

Word. I can imagine the conversation now.

"Congrats! Is this a 50 Shades baby?"

"Why yes! After I read it, I asked my RE if he was into that kind of thing, and he totally was! He tied me up and knocked me around a little before sticking a tube filled with my husband's sperm into my cervix."

Oh goodness.

LaTi07 · July 2012

I couldn't get past the first page. Terrible writing style and I found the main character weak. Not sure why everyone loves it so much! It actually caused a dry spell in my house.