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Natural Birth
sourapplemartini
member
38.5w and poorly prepared for med-free
sourapplemartini
member
If you can give me any tips or tricks that helped you, that would be great! I fully intended on going the Hypnobirth route but never ended up practicing, although I read the book.
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Re: 38.5w and poorly prepared for med-free
I second this. This is my first baby, so I'm not speaking from experience, but I feel completely prepared even though I haven't been able to go to any classes or really do anything much more than read a couple of books on going med-free. Remember that your body knows what to do, just as much as the woman who has been to multiple classes and read hundreds of books. I wouldn't focus too much on what you haven't done, I think that's probably the best way to start freaking yourself out. Good luck!
Same as above. I did take a "natural birth" class but it definitely did not focus on any specific methods. I am very much of the mindset that my body was created to do this and it knows what it needs to do. I just need to follow its cues. I went into the class with this mentality and I felt mostly out of place because I was the only one there who was not afraid; the other women talked a LOT about being scared and thinking that they wouldn't know what to do, or being afraid that they couldn't do it... I had no formal preparation before the class but I have told myself for a few years now that I simply CAN do it. I stayed quiet during many of the class sessions because it was awkward for me to not be able to join in on the conversations about fear. I was just telling DH the other night how I am actually very excited to go into labor; I know it won't be pleasant, but I am completely confident that my body will do its job and do it well.
It could be helpful to just google some things like different positions/techniques for comfort measures. I'd imagine that if you study anything in too much detail, you'll have a narrow focus and then when the big moment comes it might not be too helpful. That's why I've tried to build a mental library of ideas so that I know what some options are, but nothing so detailed that I have to expect myself to remember something exactly in the heat of the moment. I feel like just having a familiarity with different techniques might allow my mind to gravitate to whatever makes the most sense at whatever moment I'm in. I saw way too many women say "I focused my whole pregnancy on the ___ method and it all went out the window when I was in labor." I didn't want to risk that, so I just tried to give myself a lot of options.
blog! thescenery.net
You have to do what feels right for you. I did a hypnobirthing course and my practice at home was mostly listening to the birth affirmations track nightly before bed. While I hardly used hypnobirthing during my 21 hour labor I know it made a difference because I believed the affirmations and was confident in my body's abilities. It sounds like PP already has this confidence so maybe she would be less likely to benefit from this type of preparation. I will say the deeper your conviction the less likely you will doubt it if labor gets tough. Also i would think those with more preperation might be more succesful in achieving their NB goals than thise that did mot. I didn't feel ready for labor until my water broke (at 35 weeks) and suddenly I trusted my body and it's abilities and had a wonderful labor and delivery. Keep practicing if you believe it is helping and good luck with your labor and delivery.
I agree with what others have said regarding trusting your body and the fact that it was made for birthing.
I read Hypnobirthing and appreciated some of the breathing techniques, but I know from previous experience that the visualization techniques don't work well for me. What I found most useful in the book was the explanation of what is happening with your body during birth. I think understanding the physiological process will be most useful to me so I have a way to reason what's happening rather than freaking out because I don't know what's going on.
There are several midwives that practice at the center I'm using. The more experienced ones encouraged trusting my body and learning about how it works during birth, and gave me their thoughts on various birth methods. The newer MWs highly recommended Hypno/Birthing/Babies and even a new one called Baby Boot Camp or something but after looking into those programs more, none of them completely gelled with my sensibilities, so instead they recommended books that I may enjoy for learning different birth positions, partner massage, etc.
Anytime spent doing what you need to do to get the outcome you desire is never a waste of time. I did the hypnobirthing books and cd's too. It helped my confidence as I'm not surrounded by people that support my decision. So doing what I did to prepare meant learning to communicate my desires with my Dr. (I had twins so no midwife) and he was supportive.
It's about preparing in the way that will make you feel most confident and relaxed.
Personally, an hour a day of preparing sounds like no fun. So I didn't do that. A class every Saturday for 13 weeks also sounded no fun, so I didn't do Bradley. I like doing yoga, so I did that. I like having an expert around to tell me what's going on, so I hired a doula. That doesn't make yoga + a doula better or worse than Hypnobabies or Bradley for everyone... just for me.
OP, the book "The Birth Partner" is great. It's a pretty easy read and I really liked it. Really, just decide what you want and do it. The hard part is making that decision every contraction.
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Oh P.S: coming back to add:
I really, really wanted to do a labour massage class so that I could be prepared, but by the time we got around to booking it, there were no spaces available. I spent a lot of time freaking out over it, thinking "how am I going to be able to cope when I haven't even taken a massage class?". The first thing I did (obviously, easier said than done) was calm down and tell myself everything would be ok. Then, any time I had an ache or a pain, I would grab my DH and together we would figure out exactly what helped with that pain. For example, we figured out that for lower back pain I like him to take my roll-on deodorant (with the lid on) and rub my back with it; but for pain in my spine I like him to knead it with his knuckles. Again, this is my first baby so I can't comment on how useful it actually is in labour, but that's what I would recommend to you: experimenting with any aches or pains.
I went all natural with my second as I'd had way too much interference with my first that resulted in a long painful birth experience (he was stuck and my epidural had worn off by the time I gave birth)
I had my sisters and husband there to support me with #2, I refused the IV and would only allow intermittent monitering, the more you have to sit still while the hospital staff messes with you, the more impatient you'll get, less equipped you'll be to handle the pain and you'll want drugs.
My best advice is to move, move, move, walk, squat, do anything you can to open your pelvis and help baby move down in to the position they need to be in for a quick and successful birth. Do not feel like you need to be laying on that bed just because its there! With each contraction, I would squat in sort of a grande pliae(okay, I can't spell that word) and visualize my pelvis seperating, my cervix opening and my baby moving down the birth canal. When I couldn't take it anymore I got in the tub. The nurse was great, she brought me cranberry spritzers to keep me cool and I'll be honest, it eventually got really painful, right when I thought I couldn't take it anymore, my water broke and I felt like I needed to push and indeed I did. It went very very fast!
I can't tell you how amazing I felt immediatly after. It was like night and day compared to my first. After giving birth to my first son I was so exhausted from a long labor and I was shaking so bad I couldn't even hold him and had to ask DH to take him. NOT the experience I had looked forward to. With DS #2 I was alert and steady and full of natural endorphins allowing me to completely revel in his birth.
DS, May 2011
I had an almost natural birth with my OB and #2. I was doing intermittent monitoring and I believe I had an IV because I was planning on an epi at some point. She's the most "pro-med-free" OB at my practice so I'm hoping she delivers this baby too. She wanted to break my water when I was 7-8cm with DS and I asked for an hour, which she gave me. Water broke on its own not too long after. I know my OB with #1 was all about the clock so I guess we'll see who's on call that night.
Breastfeeding and pregnant!
Being a FTM and having yet to give birth, my opinion might not mean much, but I totally agree here. My biggest "prep" is hiring a doula to tell me what to do in the heat of the moment lol. That and having a chiropractor help prep my body, ligaments and muscles. My personality/temperament just gravitates to having the support of experts when I feel vulnerable, especially b/c I can be very cerebral, and I don't relax easily. I am also reading about what happens to the body in labor but to be honest, sometimes for me TMI is a very bad thing. I will start to overthink or analyze things and fail to relax. So I step away from the material when I find myself immersed in too many details and try to just absorb a little at a time. So yes, "preparing" has more to do with your needs, not completing one particular course!
"Your body is already prepared. Just get into the mindset that you are strong enough to do it all by yourself and you will. "
Ditto. You're body knows what to do, trust it. Take one contraction at a time. Relax.
Physically, i stayed in the shower while laboring at home and got on hands and knees during the contractions. bent over swaying and counter pressure helped. However, in the end, I believe it was my mental state that helped me do it.
I tried to prepare by going to a birth class and reading birthing from within.
Honestly? When the pain was mild-bad what helped was the breathing and trying to move around. Also a hands and knees position. When the pain was very very bad nothing helped. I couldn't focus on breathing or visualizing or positive affirmations! As if. I was just so very shocked and appalled that such pain existed. What got me through this tough time? I just took one contraction at a time. During it I screamed I wanted drugs, between them I asked myself if I could do it one more time? And I could. I was about to cave when she told me i was in transition.
I think knowing about the process etc helped. I knew transition was the most painful, so when she said I was 8cm I knew then, oh there is a reason for this level of pain. And I knew it was almost over and I'd meet my little girl soon. So then I could do it.
So I don't think I could have "prepared more". Next time I will prepare even less, aka do absolutely nothing and just hope I can be strong enough to make it. And if I am not? Well who cares! At the end of the day you have a beautiful little one in your arms and you don't care how they got there really! I thought I would care so much more about little details but in the end I didn't. I just wanted her out!
Oh boy. I remember that "unprepared" feeling.
I did a Hypnobabies home study course but I didn't finish it (DS came early at 37 weeks and I was working full time and I'm a slacker...lol). We took several childbirth prep classes. My mother-in-law is a childbirth educator. And how much of that preparation did I use? SQUAT.
I was only in labor for 4 hours. I was an hour in before my water broke and I realized what was happening. It was nothing like I expected. I refused to listen to my Hypnobabies tracks...it just didn't "feel right". I used none of the pain coping techniques we learned. All I wanted to do in the moment was pace back and forth and bend over with each contraction. My body TOTALLY took over in a primal way that I didn't expect. And thank God because I had no clue what I was doing.
Bottom line...you can prepare yourself all you want but you have no idea what will work for you and your situation until you actually get there. Things that helped me were having a supportive partner who was willing to meet my needs, even if that "need" is just having someone to *** at when things get uncomfortable.
Good luck mama! You're going to do great!