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Natural Birth
Minipenguin
member
What exactly does a doula do?
Minipenguin
member
DH and I have been getting recommendations for the same doula from several people. So we scheduled a time to meet with her in September since she is traveling a lot in August and I'm not due until January 19th.
I'm not really sure what my expectations should be and I can't find anything concrete online (I am a FTM). I know they're there for support, but do they usually suggest different positions to try? Will she have enough medical knowledge to be able to say "this pain/feeling is normal" or "something may be wrong"...? I am giving birth in a hospital so I'm not expecting her to provide medical care, but DH and I will be the only ones in the room so I won't have my mother (or anyone) to ask questions and I worry about everything.
Some things I've read say doulas will help "facilitate communication" between the hospital staff and the patient. Is that normal? What kind of communication?
We will meet with her and ask her some questions, but I'm just trying to get an idea of what to expect to I can make a list of things to bring up with her.
TIA. Sorry I'm so clueless.
ETA: In hindsight, did you think your doula was "worth it"? (Good to have around, worth the money, etc.)
This discussion has been closed.
Re: What exactly does a doula do?
have you checked out www.dona.org? It is a national doula website. Lots of great information there and good answers to your questions.
I'm a FTM as well, and have already met with my doula (I'm due Oct 2). It's my understanding that *legally* she can't really give any medical advice, and a lot of things are "check with your OB, but I suggest....." type of stuff. At our first meeting she gave me a list of positions to try to practice for laboring, we talked about what will happen in the delivery room, and discussed my birth plan. It is my understanding that she is there to support me as well as my husband, and help facilitate us having the birth experience we want to have. She's not really there to "confront" any hospital staff, but she can explain things to me that are going on (because the nursing staff is busy busy busy!) and can advocate for me and my birth plan if necessary.
No, I hadn't seen that website! Thanks, I'm reading it now. I guess I don't really see the difference here. She can't "confront" them but she can advocate? I don't really see where the lines are drawn.
My doula made my DH a rock star. We met a three times before labour to discuss what I wanted (and she lent me some books). During labour, she came when I said I needed her and showed DH how to do hip squeezes and back counterpressure. She and DH also took turns so no one got too tired. She helped me know when it was time to go to the hospital. She reassured me that the amount of blood I was seeing was normal. She stayed with me in the ER while DH parked the car and we got checked in. She checked on us the next day and at home to make sure breastfeeding was going well.
A doula can help you articulate what you want and remind you of your plan. She can urge you to say "Can we talk about that for 5 minutes?" to slow down hospital interventions and give you time to think.
Entirely worth it. I said something about not hiring one for our next birth, and DH was the one pointing out that every birth is different.
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OP, this is kinda what I meant by "advocate" and not "confront"-she wants to help you stick to your wishes, but will not stand in the doorway of your room refusing to let the hospital staff do what they think is best....like tokenhoser said, it will give you time to slow down and think-I personally don't want to feel rushed or pressured into any major decisions when I'm already distracted by contractions. But I do want what's best for the baby above all, so if intervention becomes necessary, I want to at least know for sure what's happening and why.