Parenting after a Loss

Pre-Baby vs. Post-Baby

Back story:

DH asked if I could go pick up a form that we need from a place literally two minutes away. However, I am just about to put DD down for a nap. He asked if I could do it first since it'll "only take 5 minutes."

Hmm... pre-baby, I would jump in the car, head over, park (or double park with the hazards on) run in, pick it up, and get back. Five minutes for sure.

Post-baby, I'd have to check DD's diaper, change my clothes since I'm still in PJ's and I haven't even showered yet (I'm sexy and I know it!), grab her bag, strap her in, drive over and park nicely, get her out, carry her in, grab the forms, walk back out to the car, strap her in, drive back, well, you get the idea. This is more like a 30 minute ordeal!

So, it got me thinking about how different a specific event can be pre-baby vs. post-baby.

Pre-baby: Staying up til 1am meant a good night filled with fun. Can't wait to do it again! Post-baby: Staying up til 1am meant there were lots of screaming, tears, and no fun whatsoever. Please let that never happen again!

Pre-baby: Grocery shopping meant spending most of my time in the snack aisle. Post-baby: Grocery shopping means spending most of my time picking out snacks for DD. Seriously, I can sit there for forever reading the ingredients, deciding on which flavor puffs/yogurt melts/wagon wheels, what type of fruit puree mixes, etc.

Pre-baby: Going to the mall and leaving with clothes! Post-baby: Going to the mall and leaving with clothes for DD, only.

What are yours?

 

My Chart

My Life

BFP 7.7.09 - CVS 9.10.09 (Girl) - 9.24.09 Severe Fatal Malformation - D&E 10.7.09 @ 17wks
BFP 6.1.10 - 6.10.10 Ectopic M/C @ 5wks
BFP 10.26.10 - 10.29.10 CP
BFP 1.30.11 - CVS 3.28.11 (Girl) - EDD 10.11.11 - Born 10.6.11
BFP 12.18.12 - 12.20.12 CP
BFP 3.18.13 - CVS 5.21.13 (Girl) - EDD 12.2.13 - Born 11.24.13
BFP 6.10.14 - CVS 7.2.14 (Girl) - EDD 1.12.15 - Born sleeping 8.6.14 @ 17w5d

Re: Pre-Baby vs. Post-Baby

  • We could go out to dinner and a movie whenever we felt like it. Now we have to plan ahead a week in advance and line up child care, oh and go in the afternoon because he won't go to bed at night for anyone but me.
    BFP 7/27/10, no hb discovered 9/3/10, natural m/c 9/17/10
    BFP #2- 2/1/11,bleeding- 2/6/11, natural m/c @ 5wks
    BFP #3- 4/29/11 - DS born 12/31/11
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    TTCAL buddies with LilMaggs and psumel13
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  • Pre-Baby: Singing along with the radio cranked in the car.

    Post-Baby: Radio off but singing any and all children's songs I can think of. :)

    Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Third Birthday tickers

    image

  • Pre Baby- Relaxing stroll through Target, browsing anything and everything.

    Post Baby- madly running through aisles trying to hide from toy and food aisles while chucking snacks at DS

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  • Pre-baby: go shopping after work to the mall so I have something new to wear to work!

    Post-baby: shopping after work is not happening because DS doesn't like getting in and out of car especially after long day at daycare. I have to plan one weekend a month to go shopping for myself and started to buy most of my clothes online.

    BFP 1: 08Aug10, EDD: 14Apr11, D&E 11Sep10 BFP 2: 29Jan11, EDD: 12Oct11, DS born 07Oct11!!! Image and video hosting by TinyPic Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • "Sleeping in" has changed from getting up gloriously late on the weekend to getting up at 8am instead of 6am because DS miraculously "slept in." 

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  • imagemundayem:
    We could go out to dinner and a movie whenever we felt like it. Now we have to plan ahead a week in advance and line up child care, oh and go in the afternoon because he won't go to bed at night for anyone but me.

    Yep. And to add:

    Pre baby: have sex when we were horny

    Post baby: have sex because she's actually asleep and it's our only time to do so. Oh, and it had best be a quickie. 


    BFP #1 via IUI ~ L (Fatal Birth Defect) 4/7/10
    BFP #2 via IUI ~ m/c
    BFP #3 via cancelled IUI ~ C (2lb 3oz; HELLP) 5/16/11
    BFP #4 via the natural (free!) way ~ E (8lb 11oz) 9/13/12
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  • imagedamabo80:

    imagemundayem:
    We could go out to dinner and a movie whenever we felt like it. Now we have to plan ahead a week in advance and line up child care, oh and go in the afternoon because he won't go to bed at night for anyone but me.

    Yep. And to add:

    Pre baby: have sex when we were horny

    Post baby: have sex because she's actually asleep and it's our only time to do so. Oh, and it had best be a quickie. 

    Pre Baby:  Got horny

    Post Baby:  What does horny mean? 

    image







  • imagedamabo80:

    imagemundayem:
    We could go out to dinner and a movie whenever we felt like it. Now we have to plan ahead a week in advance and line up child care, oh and go in the afternoon because he won't go to bed at night for anyone but me.

    Yep. And to add:

    Pre baby: have sex when we were horny

    Post baby: have sex because she's actually asleep and it's our only time to do so. Oh, and it had best be a quickie. 

    What Damabo said Sad

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  • imagehopingwaiting:

    "Sleeping in" has changed from getting up gloriously late on the weekend to getting up at 8am instead of 6am because DS miraculously "slept in." 

     

    YesThis girl right here....

    12/13/10 BFP 12/23/10 Miscarriage 3/6/11 BFP EDD 11/09/11 11/03/11 C-Section at 39w1d for failure to progress on induction for HBP and GD Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Image and video hosting by TinyPic Cincinnati Reds Pictures, Images and Photos image ~~~~~Everyone Welcome PgAL/PAL~~~~~~
  • Pre-baby -- Friday night meant martinis at home and a relaxing dinner at a local restaurant with reservations at 9. Sleeping in on Saturday till 8. 

    Post-baby --  Friday night means watching DH have a martini (we still have "cocktail hour" but I have a mocktail in a martini glass) and getting DS to bed while DH cooks dinner. If we're lucky we eat by 9. Then we collapse into bed cause DS will be up overnight and early in the morning. :)

    image 

    BFP #1 5/2010 - Missed m/c at 8 weeks
    BFP #2 2/2011
    Baby G welcomed with love and relief 10/2011
    Surprise BFP 1/8/2013...say what? Baby A arrived 9/2013

    Motherhood is not for wimps

     image
    image


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  • All of the above and simple things like going to the library and browsing.
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  • Pre-baby: Datenights on a regular basis (usually weekly, every Friday night) Post-baby: DH an I are lucky to get one in once a month! Especially since we aren't close by to any family and we don't have many sitter options.
    Nov. 19, 2010 BFP #1--m/c Dec. 24th, 2010 First cycle after m/c on Feb. 2, 2011--March 8th, 2011 BFP #2 EDD Nov. 19, 2011. Nadia Dorothy Grace born on 11-18-11 @ 3:04pm 6lbs 14oz Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • imagehopefulmom81:
    imagedamabo80:

    imagemundayem:
    We could go out to dinner and a movie whenever we felt like it. Now we have to plan ahead a week in advance and line up child care, oh and go in the afternoon because he won't go to bed at night for anyone but me.

    Yep. And to add:

    Pre baby: have sex when we were horny

    Post baby: have sex because she's actually asleep and it's our only time to do so. Oh, and it had best be a quickie. 

    Pre Baby:  Got horny

    Post Baby:  What does horny mean? 

     It's more like:

    Pre Baby: DH helping me take off my clothes meant sex.

    Post Baby: DH helping me take off my clothes means there is either poop, puke or snot on my shirt and I'm trying not to get it in my hair.

     

    Pre Baby: Crawling into bed with DH and hearing him say, "I've been thinking about this all day." meant sex.

    Post Baby: Crawling into bed with DH and hearing him say, "I've been thinking about this all day." means sleep.

     

    Pre Baby: A hand sliding down my shirt meant sex.

    Post Baby: A hand sliding down my shirt means DS is hungry.

    image

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers



    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • vflipovflipo member

    Pre-baby: Sleeping in was 9am

    Post-baby: Sleeping in is 6am.

    I married a ginger.
    m/c 12/25/09 (5w5d) mm/c D&C 4/9/10 (11w1d) Take home baby 2/22/11
    My boobies belong to cour10e
  • Pre-baby: I had a real purse.

    Post-baby: I carry my wallet in the diaper bag.

    Pre-baby: Getting groped by DH

    Post-baby: Getting groped by DS 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Pre-baby:  Shopping anywhere and everywhere...Target, the mall, etc.

    Post-baby:  Shopping online so I can take my time to peruse and decide what I want, rather than having to run through the aisles to finish up ASAP before DS needs to nurse or gets tired of sitting in his carseat and I then have to spend the entire shopping trip holding him.

    Pre-baby:  Weekend brunch.

    Post-baby:  DH running to Dunkin Donuts to get coffee and munchkins, because, really, who has time for brunch, or even a whole donut?

    Pre-baby:  Sleeping in, napping.

    Post-baby:  Going to bed at 8:30 so I can get as much shut eye as possible before the first feeding of the night.  Waking up at 5:30 a.m. every day. 

    There are so many more but really who has time!?

    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers 
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers 

    BFP #1 6/28/11 ~ EDD 3/7/12 ~ m/c 7/15/11 at 6w2d
    BFP #2 8/29/11 ~ EDD 5/12/12. 4/25/12: Our take home baby is here!
     BFP #3 8/27/13 ~ EDD 5/11/14.  4/27/14:  Our second take home baby is here!

  • You ladies brighten my day.  Big Smile
    My Chart

    My Life

    BFP 7.7.09 - CVS 9.10.09 (Girl) - 9.24.09 Severe Fatal Malformation - D&E 10.7.09 @ 17wks
    BFP 6.1.10 - 6.10.10 Ectopic M/C @ 5wks
    BFP 10.26.10 - 10.29.10 CP
    BFP 1.30.11 - CVS 3.28.11 (Girl) - EDD 10.11.11 - Born 10.6.11
    BFP 12.18.12 - 12.20.12 CP
    BFP 3.18.13 - CVS 5.21.13 (Girl) - EDD 12.2.13 - Born 11.24.13
    BFP 6.10.14 - CVS 7.2.14 (Girl) - EDD 1.12.15 - Born sleeping 8.6.14 @ 17w5d
  • Pre-Baby: Showering - Shampoo hair, soap, Condition hair, shave, wash face, relax... 20 minutes. Post-Baby: Showering - Shampoo hair and hope the suds clean the rest of my body... 4 minutes.

    That is, if I even have time or remember to shower because honestly, more often than not, I realize at 10pm that I haven't showered for the day and I would rather just go to bed than spend any extra time awake.

    My Chart

    My Life

    BFP 7.7.09 - CVS 9.10.09 (Girl) - 9.24.09 Severe Fatal Malformation - D&E 10.7.09 @ 17wks
    BFP 6.1.10 - 6.10.10 Ectopic M/C @ 5wks
    BFP 10.26.10 - 10.29.10 CP
    BFP 1.30.11 - CVS 3.28.11 (Girl) - EDD 10.11.11 - Born 10.6.11
    BFP 12.18.12 - 12.20.12 CP
    BFP 3.18.13 - CVS 5.21.13 (Girl) - EDD 12.2.13 - Born 11.24.13
    BFP 6.10.14 - CVS 7.2.14 (Girl) - EDD 1.12.15 - Born sleeping 8.6.14 @ 17w5d
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