How would you handle this?

Rachl323 · July 2012

Ok, I am in a pretty unique situation and I don't really know what to do about this! Here is the situation: I will be moving from Dallas to Denver next week (at 20 weeks pregnant). My friends (in Dallas) and my family (in SE Texas) both want to throw me a shower, which I am ok with. I am high risk, so I won't be able to fly after September.

The plan is to fly to Dallas one weekend and have a shower, then drive to SE Texas and spend the week with my mom and have the other shower the next weekend, then fly back to Denver. This seems simple enough, but I am concerned about how to get gifts back to Denver from two showers! I can ship them, but that seems like it would be expensive, as would trying to fly them back.

My friend throwing the shower suggested putting my Denver address and having people ship the gifts, but I thought that might be tacky, not to mention my new house will not be ready until mid-September so I won't really know where I will be at the time of the shower (we will be in an apt until then).

Her other suggestion was just to request gift cards, but I am weary of that too. I don't want to demand gifts, I really just want to celebrate my good news with my friends and family!

What would you do? I am thinking the shipping method would probably be the best, even though it could be costly.

dufferoo · July 2012

I wouldn't say anything about gifts at all on the invites. IF people ask one of your hostesses what you would like, they could always say something like "gift cards or small items would be great since she'll have to ship everything back to Dallas." They might then get their own idea that they could ship stuff directly to you. But I think you have the right idea about just wanting to celebrate the good news with the people you love, and not worrying too much about the gift situation!

Cheerilee · July 2012

My showers were in a different state, as well. I was able to return and re-buy the larger items. Everything else, I either shipped back home (it cost me around $25 for a 16x16x16 box through USPS Parcel Post) or put it in a second suitcase. We packed our smaller suitcase inside an empty larger suitcase so we could just check the second bag one way.

MelleTX · July 2012

Cheerilee:
My showers were in a different state, as well. I was able to return and re-buy the larger items. Everything else, I either shipped back home (it cost me around $25 for a 16x16x16 box through USPS Parcel Post) or put it in a second suitcase. We packed our smaller suitcase inside an empty larger suitcase so we could just check the second bag one way.

THIS.

I am attending an out of state shower over Labor Day weekend. I assume most of my friends are smart enough to buy smaller gifts that can easily be packed or give gift cards. I think they will probably buy a lot of clothes, but I made sure to put plenty of small items on my registry. I am taking two suitcases, but packing the smaller one inside the larger one for the trip down. If someone happens to buy me something too big to fit then I will return it there and rebuy it here - or I will have it shipped.

I would never suggest they buy certain gifts over the others. I am grateful for whatever they gift me with.

rhubarb123 · July 2012

I agree with the others. Pack a small suitcase into a larger one that you can check with gifts for on the way home. Anything too big return and repurchase when you get home. You might have to ship some items that you don't have receipts for. It is a good thing you are at your mom's for a week. Maybe she can help you pack, return, and/or ship items.

Rachl323 · July 2012

Thank you for the all the ideas! As far as not having showers, I really want to celebrate this baby, as I have had 2 early m/c's and one ectopic in the past. I do understand flying can be rough, but my doctor is very comfortable with me flying during my second trimester, so I feel good about it too! I know that might change, but I will play it by ear!

I will be living in an apartment for the next month and a half that is known as a 'party place' (free with corporate relocation so I'm not complaining!) and don't think I will be making a lot of close friends. I will be working from home, so will probably not meet a lot of people, much less someone who will want to throw me a shower! Also, the move was kind of unexpected, and my friend already started making plans for it, and my mom is so excited about the family one!

I think I will pack an extra suitcase and go that route. I didn't even think about returning and re-buying things. Genius!

eav2c · July 2012

Not that unique--people ask this all the time.

Shipping will be bet expensive unless people just give clothes and other small and compact things. Will someone be driving your way when the baby is born? If so, I'd have them transport everything for you. Also, guests will be smart enough to have gifts shipped to you straught from the store or will buy things that can easily be packed. You can simply not register for big name items too (I.e stroller). It is my experience that people don't buy the big name purchased unless you are registered for it. However, it is not acceptable to ask for something specifically (I.e asking for gift cards only).

DelBride2012 · July 2012

Shipping via USPS Parcel Post really isn't that expensive; I shipped a 50 lb box from Oregon to Washington D.C. for ~$50.

Rachl323 · July 2012

eav2c:
Not that unique--people ask this all the time.
Shipping will be bet expensive unless people just give clothes and other small and compact things. Will someone be driving your way when the baby is born? If so, I'd have them transport everything for you. Also, guests will be smart enough to have gifts shipped to you straught from the store or will buy things that can easily be packed. You can simply not register for big name items too (I.e stroller). It is my experience that people don't buy the big name purchased unless you are registered for it. However, it is not acceptable to ask for something specifically (I.e asking for gift cards only).

I was thinking the unique part was that I'll have three different addresses in the next 60 days, so I won't know where to tell anyone to ship something! It's good to know that I am not alone in this situation though, because I've received some great advice!

With a 13+ hour drive, I think that most people will come and fly to see the baby!

bklynbmp · July 2012

Let people buy what they want and bring some empty suitcases.

Only register for small items.

If one or two people buy you something very large, you can decide if its worth it to ship back or not. Otherwise you could return it for store credit and rebuy it at your local baby store.

Prescribing what a guest may buy you for any reason is a no-no.

tiffmatt · July 2012

I am surprised I did not already see this in a reply, but for any items that are too large for your luggage or to ship, return them to the store then buy then when you get home. Your Aunt doesn't need to know that the swing she bought you was returned and you then bought the same thing, she'll just be happy to see a picture of the baby asleep in it some day.

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